why god why

[IDS]

Is there not one
who will challenge me?

Is there not one
who will come from their hiding?

I see your bibles
and your ornaments

I hear your words
but I see your life

Where is the champion
of righteousness?

Where is one
who will stand against me?

I see your fear
and watch you run

I see you hide
behind your light

Is there not one
who is willing to die?

Is there not one
who I can crucify?

I hate who you are
and who you serve

I have destroyed all
who have answered my call

Why do I bother with you
meaningless christians?

Why don't I accept that not one
really means what they say?





Is there not a cause?
Why do you flee?

Hear what he says
about the One we love

Yes, I am a child

Yes, you have been
a warrior for many years

Will you accept this challenge?
Why are you so angry with me?

What did I say wrong?
Is there not a cause?




I will go
I will silence this giant

Why do so many know what to do?
And yet not do what they know?

Wonderful advice,
beautiful strategies

But I have not time
to learn how to fight

Who is this one
who challenges my Love?

Who is this one
who puts fear in all?

My GOD will deliver
My GOD will win




I will fight you
HA!!! _ YOU???




Come, you puny, weak one
Is this the best GOD has?

I will rip you apart
Expose your heart and soul

All will see what becomes of the fool
who dares to challenge me





A hurting teen holds a bottle
of pills and contemplates

A needle sets "free"
from the unending pain

A lonely wife responds
to a stranger's invitation

A little child looks for food
while parents are too high

An inmate is trapped
by hatred and violence

The battlefield is covered
with the remains of ruined lives

And the laughter
of this champion of darkness




Armed with nothing but the Word and faith
I approach this vile creature

I reach into my heart
and lay hold of a truth

Truth solid as rock
and faith to launch it





Silence

Laughter stops
Advice from experts stops

Silence

A bewildered look
Blood flowing from his forehead

This enemy of righteousness
This champion of darkness falls

Wounded at your feet
lies the enemy of all you love

Quickly you take his large sword
and end the tryanny

Removing his helmet
you lift his severed head high

Only then do you recognize
the old creature



.....peace.....

 

[justabitofhelp]

Field,
You've gotten a ton of advice here the past week and some of it seems to be contradictory to me. I pray that I will only offer some true Biblical advice. First, your wife can justify a divorce on the basis of fornication, however; if you are both Christians (which I gather from your posts) she should know that she is to forgive you as she has been forgiven. GOD does not tell people to get divorces!

YOU have a hard row to hoe. You have betrayed her trust by your affair and from the sounds of it did so again by perusing porn on your PC?! And, yes, your wife will look upon that as a betrayal. Near as I can tell you don't give a time frame for when you were involved in the porn & when you were cleansed of it. If this is something that you gave up some time ago, you can show her evidence of it--the files she found on there will be dated from when you downloaded them. How much residue did she find? A few stray files that date back to when you gave up the porn, shouldn't be insurmountable. The greater the volume of files, the less acceptable will be the explanation that these were overlooked when you divested yourself of this lifestyle.

At this point you need to work on doing that which you should have been doing all along. You are to love her as yourself (Ephesians 5:25-33, Colossians 3:19) You are to give her honor (I Peter 3:7). Be slow to anger and quick to compliment. Search for reasons to give her compliments. Reassure her again & again that she is the ONLY one for you. Tell her how deeply you love her and how much you regret that you've done things to hurt her. Be completely honest and sincere with her. You can't force her to reconcile. Pray with and for her throughout every single day--not just while you are estranged, but ALWAYS! Give GOD thanks for her and your children and ask for Him to help you to always do what is right for them.

My prayers are with you and your family.

 

[bubblegirl23]

Just a question slightly off-track, but if a husband and wife are both christians: the husband must repent and the wife to forgive - but how many times can a man cheat before she is "allowed" to leave him?

I'm not saying you'll cheat again Fields, nothing about you - someone's reply to you sparked my interest as a new christian.

 

[fields316_2000]

welp i called her and told her that im still he rhusband in gods eyes and will still continue to support the finances that we have together (car, insurance, credit cards, etc) and that i had to apologize to her. i told her that with no excuses i hurt her in the past- i cheated on her, lied to her, hid things from her and that i was addicted to internet porn but i have been repentent and will give it to the lord. i told her that i didnt want a reply, but she said her reply was sometihng that i already knew. i told her to just pray for me and let that be that. she said ok.

in another conversation my cousin who called me up and told me about thier conversation. he told her that he prayed about it and that this is not going to end in divorce but delieverance...and we'll be tighter together because of it. he told her that he knows in his spirit that i have to change for the long haul and she replyed that she doesnt want me anymore period. he pulled her card and told her that she was probly praying to god to change my ways and wanted me to be the husband that she needed..she said she did but doenst want the prayers answered anymore. so my lil cousin told her that her prayers are according to HIS time not hers and this is why this is manifesting now.
she tried to say she has her bible verses to back up her decision, but she didnt feel like talking about it because im his cousin and wont listen. he asked her point blank - what did GOD say about it. not your pastor mom or friends..what did GOD say?
he told her not to lean on her own understanding, but on the will of the lord because this is not going to come to pass. he told her that since her prayers wernt answered she even questioned god in why her marriage wouldnt work, only now she is trying to ignore what is going on,,,...she is being super mean to me though. for real

she thought that it wasnt fair for her to be on her own, while i have her pick me up from the air port. so i had to find another way around. she seemed pretty conflicted when i caleld her because she was urging me to go to selective peoples housees for thanksgiving since she knew i wasnt eating with her. so there that is. i just pray for god's strength and his will. lonleyness and the iritation of thinking about her out with other guys in her church are building up. her pastor desperatly wants to speak with me monday morning, only she said she is not going to go because her mind is made up. so please pray. im pretty defeated. ive heard about 4 times that in the end there is victory in this..but for now it looks very ugly..

 

[bubblegirl23]

I'd be careful listening to hearsay. She may believe what she told your cousin, but women change their mind alot and she made decide different tomorrow. I hope it all works out for the best. What does get me wondering is why you sinned in the first place. Is there a problem in the marriage that was left unaddressed? Is it fixable? Have you spoken to her about it? Could you offer to fix it together?

 

[fields316_2000]

well apparently i was flirting with some girl online months back andshe found the email..that was the problem. it was something that happened and i let it go and never pursued it - repented and left it alone as far as online flirting. i have been addicted to internet porn, but im seeking the lord to be delivered. she isnt having it. she is quiet mad which is totally understandable..i messed it up. i was told that if i put god first life will work itself out..but looking at the problem makes me question the word i got at church..

 

[bubblegirl23]

Ok, but I meant a problem in the marriage. Did you flirt with this other girl because you are sexually bored? Looking for another fulfilment your wife doesn't agree with? I'm not asking you say it here because that's private, but you can think about it. Why did porn suddenly become of interest? Are you escaping from troubles elsewhere? boredom? wanting variety?

God will do his best for us - maybe He feels you're best to separate for a while. Your wife may feel this divorce is God's best for her because she won't have a "cheating" husband. In the back of her mind she is going to link "getting back together" with "risking him hurting me again". Pray and God will guide you.

 

[Endure2]

....wow
ive never heard a story like that before....

i think it was webster who said something like
"i can calculate the movements of the heavonly bodies... but never understand the madness of men"

i dont know if you should try to wrap your mind around this or understand it all... it might be a hopless cause.

man God has got a way, and if you seek him and pray and believe and follow the Lord, regardless of what you dont know or how crasy some people in your life are... hell make a way for you and restore your life.
i dont have all the answers and regardless of other peoples good intentions without the Lord they probly dont either ( im not saying the rest of these replies arent good ) but man give this to God and seek him, and he will see you through, he will... see you through, and hell doit all by himself.
go on with God and believe in a miracle.

 

[heartnsoul]

I'm sorry to hear all the pain and struggles you are experiencing. Know that your wife needs time to heal. Trust is the foundation of every relationship. When the trust is violated, it is very difficult to build back the trust. So your wife will need time to heal from the betrayal you committed. Granted, you have already repented and turned your life around, but that doesn't mean everyone is on the same "time zone" as you are. Time will be the test here. Now that you are separated from your wife, this will give her time to sort things out and hopefully grow closer to God and strengthen her faith. Meanwhile, it will also give you a chance to draw closer to God and grow stronger in your own faith. Separation is what got you into trouble in the first place, true? So this is a super way of testing you to see if you would remain faithful or go with another woman during your loneliness right now. If you truly love your wife, then keep gently letting her know how much you love her. Continue to do and say the things that would make her happy. Give her space to heal. Pray hard and be patient. Separation is not divorce. Try your best to focus on your own walk with God instead of focusing all of your energies on trying to control and monitor your wife's actions. Let go and let God. I know this is easier said than done. In all adversities in life, there are lessons to be learned. Through this separation, I believe good things will come out of this and God will teach both of you some important lessons of life. Look for the "lining" in every cloud. Know that this temporary separation will not be forever. Sooner or later, your wife will need to make a decision one way or another--to stay or divorce. Whatever she decides, know that God will never forsake you or her. God will always love both of you and work hard to bring you closer to Him. If worst case she leaves, know that God will have a plan for you and for her. Don't lose faith. Learn the lesson(s) *well* and love God with all your heart. Let your wife know everyday how much you love her. Give her space and watch God work in both of your lives. Miracles do happen. We will all pray for you.

 

[forgivenmuch]

what ever happens God is there still. when people fail you God wont. hes there just a prayer away. call on him .. you are getting lots of advice... but only he can bring the healing.

 

[fields316_2000]

ok first -
when she came back she was cold. many a nights i 'got none' so i went and handled my situation and urges with internet porn . which i developed an addiction. i couldnt control my self..and took it to far. after we started to work things out and get together emotionally i went far away from that stuff..

secondly i love her and am in love with her. i just dont know how to show her sencerly without her thinking its a game or joke? i have been praying that god will see me to the end and allow her heart to accept my changes and my repentence. if god can reveal what ive done in the dark as sin i think he should be able to show her in the light what ive done in the positive.

ive been told in prayer sessions that god will make sure in the end we will have more trust and love AFTER we make it through this..and nothing else but god can make this work. at this point i believe it. if our relationship is based on meeting up at church weekly can anyone see us really breaking up? my son told me yesterday to go to church with him tomorrow at thier new church..and her pastor wants to meet me monday at 10..i think god is moving already but im consumed by fear of seeing her in church knowing i cant speak to her or hold her..man. god help me..

 

[forgivenmuch]

THERES NO EXCUSE FOR WHAT YOU DONE.. YOU SHOULD OF BEEN PATIENT WITH HER.. WHEN YOU SAY YOU DID NOT (get none) I KNOW WHY... YOU CHEATED AND SHE WAS FEELING SO SAD... I PRAY FOR YOU AND YOUR WIFE.. MAY YOU BOTH SEEK GOD IN THIS TIME.

 

[Endure2]

ill try to keep this decent but

actually..... what hes talking about when he said he didnt "get none" may seem like an immature bum's excuse....he has a very valid point... the scripture warns of this in 1 cor.7

there have been men fallen into adultery and shamefully exposed in the church... and they look really evil and their hated and adultery is evil bottom line... but some of those mens wives were not there for them in their time of need.... that is a real need and real fragile part of a man. men as husbands really do need that... im not saying we can demand it... but we do desperately need it. its how were made, and we cant help it, we cant change. its not lust or evil, but when wives are more emotional and deal more with feelings and affections and the need to feel loved and secure... husbands have more of a need for physical contact and stimulation and feeling and release, what pleases us is not what pleases you, were built diffrently, and we cant change. this is how God made us. yeah its pitiful..... but we cant help it. statistics say a mans sex drive is generally 20 to 40 times stronger than a womans... you probly really just dont know what men go through as far as sexual pressure. you werent made like us. and a marriage partners job is to find the needs of their spouse and meet those needs. and yes that goes for husbands too.

and the bible says in 1 cor 7.4 that when it comes to intercourse we must not please our own bodies, but must seek to please our spouse. that means a husband cannot get his own bodily pleasure and then stop... but he must seek to please his wife till she satisfied. but the wife cannot just seek her own bodily pleasure, but she must seek to please her husband till he is satisfied. though both have to do their job. and i as a husband will do my job becuase ill love her. and i pray that my wife will love me and do hers becuase i will desperately need it.

1 cor 7.3,5
let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence(affection): and the likewise also the wife unto the husband....defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent FOR A TIME, that ye may give yourselves to fasting a prayer, and come to together again, that satan tempt you not for your incontinency. (or your lack of selfcontrol)

a husband does not have the right to decide hes gonna go on a golf trip, a hunt, hang out with the boys... everyday and not come back home till night time and then not hold and nurture his wife becuase hes tired and got a headache and wants to just sleep... when hes leaving his wife alone with no help for her emotional needs, no feeling of love, no feeling of affection, no feeling of security . she will be tempted to go and get those things somewhere else... becuase she really genuinely needs them.

and a wife does not have the right to get all super spiritual and think shes gonna fast sex for a year to get more holy or something, or because shes never in the mood or shes always got a headache,... and leave her husband alone to battle the chemistry and divinely made mechanics of his body with no help from her... he will be severly tempted to go get help somewhere else... from someone or something else.

YOU NEVER RESIST YOUR MATE OR STOP SOMETHING THE OTHER PERSON SEVERLY WANTS AND NEEDS WITHOUT MUTUAL CONSENT FOR A LIMITED AMOUNT OF TIME! or you leave your beloved parter open to temptation from the devil. yes he or she needs to be strong in the Lord, but no one is an island unto themselves, and no one can make it on their own, what they need to survive is spread abroud in the body of Christ... and part of its in you, probly most of it actually.
someone needs to take an advil, or settle for watching hunting videos instead... dont forsake your partner.
leaving your mate to battle the chemistry and workings of their person all by themselves is forsaking them, breaking your vows and the commandment of God and your love and loyalty to them.

i did not say all that as an excuse to be a slobbering dog....
but i say that to show why we as men are sometimes fragile creatures and we need help from our wives, even if its in this seemingly taboo kind of way.
we cant help it... but God did not apologise when he made us this way, and we wont apologise for being how we are. solomon called this part of us a spring that could not be covered or stopped up... and we really cant stop it.

oh, i know im not married, but im really trying to get ready for when i am, so that it doesnt take me years and heartache and trouble to learn how it works, i dont want to cheat... and it would break me in two if my wife had to cheat to get what she needed.

 

[Endure2]

i dont care how good a hitter or pitcher you are... theres always somebody warming up in your bullpin, somebody or something has got it's eye on your spouse.
and if you neglect your spouse, or start throwing sloppy pitches, or cant hit a ball for nothin anymore, or just wont try....
it will be a temptation to them to switch you out. and the longer you neglect, the stronger the temptation.

cus theres always somebody warming up in your bullpin.

just thought that made sense and wouldnt hurt if i posted it....

 

[Dexx]

God wouldnt have told her to leave you. God honours marriage.
I think you should leave the military and move back in with your family full time (if she'll let you). Either that or get a long term posting somewhere and move your family to you.

 

[fields316_2000]

PRAISE REPORT!!!! thank you all for praying for me!!!

when i came back down here i was not seeing her. she wouldnt talk to me see me or anything. she even had a divorce lawyer, and got a job. i went kinda crazy. i was walking the streets with my kids with my gun loaded in my jacket pocket in case something popped off i didnt like. so my boy thought it be best if i left it with him while i go through this..so ok i left my gun with a friend. my son nathan asked me 'dad will you go to church with me sunday?'..and i didnt want to go because alex (my wife) was going to be there. so i decided his love is still there so i wont let him down..
i get there and it turned out to be a 2 hour prayer session where the pastors will pray for problems in groups..well ask me why every last one of them came up to me telling me that god told them i had a problem to release?! first guy said that god knows i made alot of mistakes but im forgiven and that god's hand is moving in my life. the second guy said i have a calling and god wants to use me - the third guy said that we need to pray for my family..and asked where they were. i told him to turn around! alex and the boys were right behind him..so we prayed and cryed and all..the main head pastor came over and hugged me and told me that god wanted me to know that my family is going to be back and that i have to do what the pastor says when he says it..the next thing i know im getting baptised! alex was crying and trying to avoid showing her cards..but i felt great..everything that i said i dont do is now public knowledge that i need to turn away from. the pastor then told me to come back to his office first thing in the morning. so i did.

i get there and for 3 hours the pastor is badgering me like a drill sgt about how i been a bad guy and playing in church and how since im a manipulative pretty boy i can sin..then ask for forgivness and then keep the 360 going..he said that is why my wife is gone. he did that for awhile until we got on the bible and argued the points about theology..he then told me he wants to train me to be a pastor at his church! however after his drillsgt role he called alex and had her come in..well when she got there he broke down the biblical right she DID have to leave me since i was playing with ladies on line and such..however as a christian she HAD to forgive me since i got baptised and saved (recommited) and jesus commands to forgive your brothers 7 X 70..490 times a day. so he MADE HER take my right hand and tell me im forgiven..and we cried! he showed me how to show her more love with out feeling like its forced, and told her when i do that she better not snap back something mean like - you are only doing that because pastor told you to...she HAS to let me show her. he said that today and every day after we are married - period. and that we are starting our relationship from scratch. he told me i could quiet possibly be the greatest manipulater on the plaanet and pulled the wool over his eyes..so im on trial. he wants her to stay at her moms while i stay on base for a time period. when he can see that im serious nad wont relaps into backsliding or being mean again he'll ordain that she goes home. anyhting sooner i would not learn my lesson. he also said that she has to submit to my needs - period..so we are starting over , but if i mess up he'll press forward for divorce..period. no other options. so the rest of the night alex and i were talking and laughing and i was treating her with love and respect and she took it...and thats been my last few days!!

in a conversation after the fact my wife told me this is my last year in the military..she cant take my deployments at all..so dexx you are 100% correct that im done in the army!! thanks again!!!

 

[Endure2]

well... there ya go man.
awesome.

 

[TLC4God]

you need to just pray and ask God to help you at this time ok I will be praying for you that God will be there for you. you can ask some you of your colse friends to pray for with you and hlep you at this time

 

[justabitofhelp]

Great News

 

[Machin Shin]

vondabah to hear it man