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Why do some Catholic leaders seem irreligious? And what is the data on Catholic Priests and other leaders who lost faith during or after retiring?

RileyG

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I recently began experimenting with a Catholic church and became curious how many of them are atheists or may become atheists. I have read statistics suggesting that as many as 4 in 5 "abandon traditional theology" while 2 in 5 will leave the Catholic church. To me, these statistics seem unrealistically high but when I was in inside an actual Catholic church recently (Palm Sunday) and their clergy style seemed extremely unenthusiastic to the point that I became convinced that there are many of them who are irreligious. Their service almost sounded sarcastic, like it was some SNL skit to mock how the Catholic church is all tradition and no religion (as some Protestants retort). I might just be too unfamiliar with the Catholic church's traditions, but I don't understand their worship style and each service is kinda repetitive. I almost feel like I'm watching the exact same movie over and over when I go to this particular Catholic church.

To me, this simple fact seems extremely discouraging toward experimenting more with the Catholic faith. I agree with the Catholic principle that all who espouse belief that Jesus Christ is your Lord and Savior and are saved through baptism, faith, and works will enter heaven regardless of denomination (as I don't believe any denomination that denies these things is truly "Christian"). But I'd rather be protestant my whole life than enter a denomination with a poor track history of having religious leaders who are actually religious. The fact that as many as 81% are pretending is a statistic that hurts. Some statistics claim it is lower however, but never a number lower than 1 in 3 being irreligious. I want to believe that it's rare but when common people in most Christian nations are (statistically speaking) more religious than your religious leaders, that's a huge problem.

Forgive me if you're Catholic and this post offends you. I'm curious about those two things primarily: why do Catholics worship in such a lackluster manner that it seems as if they don't actually believe a word they are saying, and what is the data on those who lose their faith? And what could actually be the reason they lose their faith? I was on Quora and some users claimed it's because of the rules on Catholic priests, who are required to abstain from marriage or any form of romance. News of sex abuse scandals between the clergy and parishioners have also been cited as motivating factors for them to lose their faith and become apostates of Christianity, either openly or secretly.

Regardless, I'd love to be educated by either Catholics or others who may know the answer or part of the answer. Thank you and God bless you all this Easter Sunday evening (from the east USA).
It seems you are not familiar with liturgical Churches where they follow a specific order and responses.

Liturgical Churches include the Catholic Church, the Orthodox Churches, Assyrian Church of the East, the Lutheran Churches, the Anglican/Episcopal Churches, and to a lesser extent, Methodist, Presbyterian, and Reformed Churches.

I have no idea where you got your statistics from. They don’t sound accurate.

Peace
 
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RileyG

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The Catechism of the Catholic Church states: 1324 The Eucharist is "the source and summit of the Christian life."134 "The other sacraments, and indeed all ecclesiastical ministries and works of the apostolate, are bound up with the Eucharist and are oriented toward it."
Catholics believe they are truly in the presence of Jesus Christ during the mass and what goes on at the mass is considered solemn and holy. Thus there is not a lot of jumping around and such outward expressions of enthusiasm. As to those Catholics who "lose their faith" the vast majority never really had proper understanding of their own faith to begin with. Without such understanding and a solid prayer life Satan is able to lead many away.
Thank you. Very well said!
 
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9Rock9

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There are lots of Protestant sex abuse cases, most recently unearthed in the Southern Baptists. Something not working there either.
With the SBC, though, it seems mostly relegated to seminaries and local churches. Apparently, the DOJ dropped all sex abuse related charges against the SBC.
 
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chevyontheriver

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With the SBC, though, it seems mostly relegated to seminaries and local churches. Apparently, the DOJ dropped all sex abuse related charges against the SBC.
Are you somehow excusing this because no charges were filed against corporate SBC? Lots of 'charges were not filed' situations happened in the Catholic Church too, but that's no excuse. We are still looking at bishops who knew or even should have known about abuse. For one I'm glad that the dirt swept under the carpet gets discovered. Sunlight is a good disinfectant.
 
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It sounds like the op should discuss questions with a priest and attend some RCIA classes. Scott Hahn’s journey from Protestantism to Catholicism is a good read. Rome Sweet Home. He has other books too explaining the liturgy. Reading the CCC can answer questions as well. Always get your info from Catholic sources. Too much junk out there concerning Catholicism. May God lead you. :praying:
 
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Adventist Heretic

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I recently began experimenting with a Catholic church and became curious how many of them are atheists or may become atheists. I have read statistics suggesting that as many as 4 in 5 "abandon traditional theology" while 2 in 5 will leave the Catholic church. To me, these statistics seem unrealistically high but when I was in inside an actual Catholic church recently (Palm Sunday) and their clergy style seemed extremely unenthusiastic to the point that I became convinced that there are many of them who are irreligious. Their service almost sounded sarcastic, like it was some SNL skit to mock how the Catholic church is all tradition and no religion (as some Protestants retort). I might just be too unfamiliar with the Catholic church's traditions, but I don't understand their worship style and each service is kinda repetitive. I almost feel like I'm watching the exact same movie over and over when I go to this particular Catholic church.

To me, this simple fact seems extremely discouraging toward experimenting more with the Catholic faith. I agree with the Catholic principle that all who espouse belief that Jesus Christ is your Lord and Savior and are saved through baptism, faith, and works will enter heaven regardless of denomination (as I don't believe any denomination that denies these things is truly "Christian"). But I'd rather be protestant my whole life than enter a denomination with a poor track history of having religious leaders who are actually religious. The fact that as many as 81% are pretending is a statistic that hurts. Some statistics claim it is lower however, but never a number lower than 1 in 3 being irreligious. I want to believe that it's rare but when common people in most Christian nations are (statistically speaking) more religious than your religious leaders, that's a huge problem.

Forgive me if you're Catholic and this post offends you. I'm curious about those two things primarily: why do Catholics worship in such a lackluster manner that it seems as if they don't actually believe a word they are saying, and what is the data on those who lose their faith? And what could actually be the reason they lose their faith? I was on Quora and some users claimed it's because of the rules on Catholic priests, who are required to abstain from marriage or any form of romance. News of sex abuse scandals between the clergy and parishioners have also been cited as motivating factors for them to lose their faith and become apostates of Christianity, either openly or secretly.

Regardless, I'd love to be educated by either Catholics or others who may know the answer or part of the answer. Thank you and God bless you all this Easter Sunday evening (from the east USA).
in my experiance, I find that familiarity Breeds contempt. for some reason the more one has contact with spiritual things the more they seem common place. and loose there special status. As believers we idealize the ministry and romanticize it, but the reality is that these are normal people with very human issues trying live in a broken world. They are suppose to be above us or at advanced in the spiritual training. To think they have problems like every commoner is beyond what most people can handle.
 
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9Rock9

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Are you somehow excusing this because no charges were filed against corporate SBC? Lots of 'charges were not filed' situations happened in the Catholic Church too, but that's no excuse. We are still looking at bishops who knew or even should have known about abuse. For one I'm glad that the dirt swept under the carpet gets discovered. Sunlight is a good disinfectant.

Fair enough. Just been seeing so much slander directed at my denomination that I can get a little defensive about it
 
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chevyontheriver

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Fair enough. Just been seeing so much slander directed at my denomination that I can get a little defensive about it
Sorry, but try being Catholic some time. It’s been an onslaught since 2002. Public school teachers have a far worse abuse profile than Catholic priests. But since you can’t sue the public schools for damages it’s almost like it never happened. But you can sue your Catholic dioceses for millions. Follow the money.

The real problem is the nearness of sexual deviancy in our culture.
 
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I recently began experimenting with a Catholic church and became curious how many of them are atheists or may become atheists. I have read statistics suggesting that as many as 4 in 5 "abandon traditional theology" while 2 in 5 will leave the Catholic church. To me, these statistics seem unrealistically high but when I was in inside an actual Catholic church recently (Palm Sunday) and their clergy style seemed extremely unenthusiastic to the point that I became convinced that there are many of them who are irreligious. Their service almost sounded sarcastic, like it was some SNL skit to mock how the Catholic church is all tradition and no religion (as some Protestants retort). I might just be too unfamiliar with the Catholic church's traditions, but I don't understand their worship style and each service is kinda repetitive. I almost feel like I'm watching the exact same movie over and over when I go to this particular Catholic church.

To me, this simple fact seems extremely discouraging toward experimenting more with the Catholic faith. I agree with the Catholic principle that all who espouse belief that Jesus Christ is your Lord and Savior and are saved through baptism, faith, and works will enter heaven regardless of denomination (as I don't believe any denomination that denies these things is truly "Christian"). But I'd rather be protestant my whole life than enter a denomination with a poor track history of having religious leaders who are actually religious. The fact that as many as 81% are pretending is a statistic that hurts. Some statistics claim it is lower however, but never a number lower than 1 in 3 being irreligious. I want to believe that it's rare but when common people in most Christian nations are (statistically speaking) more religious than your religious leaders, that's a huge problem.

Forgive me if you're Catholic and this post offends you. I'm curious about those two things primarily: why do Catholics worship in such a lackluster manner that it seems as if they don't actually believe a word they are saying, and what is the data on those who lose their faith? And what could actually be the reason they lose their faith? I was on Quora and some users claimed it's because of the rules on Catholic priests, who are required to abstain from marriage or any form of romance. News of sex abuse scandals between the clergy and parishioners have also been cited as motivating factors for them to lose their faith and become apostates of Christianity, either openly or secretly.

Regardless, I'd love to be educated by either Catholics or others who may know the answer or part of the answer. Thank you and God bless you all this Easter Sunday evening (from the east USA).
I recently began experimenting with a Catholic church and became curious how many of them are atheists or may become atheists. I have read statistics suggesting that as many as 4 in 5 "abandon traditional theology" while 2 in 5 will leave the Catholic church. To me, these statistics seem unrealistically high but when I was in inside an actual Catholic church recently (Palm Sunday) and their clergy style seemed extremely unenthusiastic to the point that I became convinced that there are many of them who are irreligious. Their service almost sounded sarcastic, like it was some SNL skit to mock how the Catholic church is all tradition and no religion (as some Protestants retort). I might just be too unfamiliar with the Catholic church's traditions, but I don't understand their worship style and each service is kinda repetitive. I almost feel like I'm watching the exact same movie over and over when I go to this particular Catholic church.

To me, this simple fact seems extremely discouraging toward experimenting more with the Catholic faith. I agree with the Catholic principle that all who espouse belief that Jesus Christ is your Lord and Savior and are saved through baptism, faith, and works will enter heaven regardless of denomination (as I don't believe any denomination that denies these things is truly "Christian"). But I'd rather be protestant my whole life than enter a denomination with a poor track history of having religious leaders who are actually religious. The fact that as many as 81% are pretending is a statistic that hurts. Some statistics claim it is lower however, but never a number lower than 1 in 3 being irreligious. I want to believe that it's rare but when common people in most Christian nations are (statistically speaking) more religious than your religious leaders, that's a huge problem.

Forgive me if you're Catholic and this post offends you. I'm curious about those two things primarily: why do Catholics worship in such a lackluster manner that it seems as if they don't actually believe a word they are saying, and what is the data on those who lose their faith? And what could actually be the reason they lose their faith? I was on Quora and some users claimed it's because of the rules on Catholic priests, who are required to abstain from marriage or any form of romance. News of sex abuse scandals between the clergy and parishioners have also been cited as motivating factors for them to lose their faith and become apostates of Christianity, either openly or secretly.

Regardless, I'd love to be educated by either Catholics or others who may know the answer or part of the answer. Thank you and God bless you all this Easter Sunday evening (from the east USA).
Are you familiar with the phrase

Ex Opere Operato ?

"Affirming the ex opere operato efficacy means being sure of God's sovereign and gratuitous intervention in the sacraments."

The Church is not made by men, but by Christ Himself. As He told Peter, you are are rock and on this rock I WILL BUILD MY CHURCH

From the parable of the wheat and the tares, it is inevitable that you would find stale unbelieving people in the Church, but they do not have the power to take away God from His Church.
The Holy Spirit works through the sacraments as they are instruments of grace. It is not dependent on the holiness of the minister or the recipient for their efficacy; however we must all take care not to perform sacrilege.
The sacraments are divided into the sacraments of the dead and the sacraments of the living.
The sacraments of the dead are so named because they can be received if a soul is in a state of mortal sin. These sacraments are Baptism, Penance, and Anointing of the Sick(if it includes sacramental Penance)
These sacraments are given to those in mortal sin, so that they may be restored to life in Christ, as He desires no soul to be lost but all come to repentance.
The other four sacraments are sacraments of the living, and it is a sacrilege to receive them while in a state of mortal sin. If the priest that ministers them is in mortal sin, it is a sacrilege between him and God, but the efficacy of the sacrament remains for their recipient, Ex Opere Operato, by the grace of the Holy Spirit.
These four sacraments are The Eucharist, Confirmation, Matrimony, and Holy Orders.
The Eucharist is the Body and Blood, Soul and Divinity of Our Lord Jesus Christ, we cannot approach Him if we have an attachment to mortal sin. As Paul says, if we eat and drink in an unworthy manner, we eat and drink condemnation upon ourselves. Regular reception of the Eucharist cleanses us from venial sin and decreases our desire for sin, aka concupicence.
Confirmation is the baptism in the Holy Spirit. It should be self evident of the sacrilege to receive the Holy Spirit while in mortal sin. Matrimony is a solemn bond between a man and a woman that can never be broken, save by death. Holy Orders is a solemn bond between a man and God to be completely in God’s service. We cannot serve two masters, so if there is an attachment to mortal sin, these sacraments become sacrilege.
Mortal sin can be cleansed by Baptism and Penance. Baptism can be received only once.
Since after one believes there remains no longer any sacrifice for sin, the soul is then required to consciously ask God for forgiveness and the grace to forsake the mortal sin.

Unfortunately, it is not custom to be spoon fed the faith when entering the Church. We must have an earnest desire to seek God, as He says you will seek me and you will find me when you search with all of your heart.
There is 2000 years of history to review that includes the writings of many saints.
The Christian life is not a passive one, but of continual seeking. God tells us to ask, seek, knock. He does not say ok you believe in me, your saved, see you in heaven, no.
When we join the Church, we enter the spiritual battle, and many will try to distract you and shipwreck your faith, but fear not, God has promised to be with you and has provided the sacraments for your assistance, if you avail yourself of their grace.
There are those that scoff at the Church and will tell you that they have a better way, but God’s Church is not built by men, we seek God, not the comfort of others that think well of us.

I am glad you asked the question and would be happy to talk with you if you like
 
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I want to pin down the statistics a bit more here.





Are your statistics talking about the clergy or the lay members? If you're talking about the clergy, then I'd be very very surprised if 81% of Catholic priests are "pretending". Can you give me a source for this?

If you're talking about the laity, then that's more plausible, though I'd like more detail on what you mean by "abandon traditional theology". I'll also note that changing beliefs and pretending about one's beliefs are two quite different things.


Regarding this observation:



This sounds like a critique of this particular priest. Perhaps he doesn't have the gift of public speaking, or perhaps (unfortunately) he has an abrasive personality. I haven't encountered any sense of sarcasm from the priests in the Catholic services I've attended. If the priest in the church you visited has a personality that clashes with yours, I'd recommend visiting a couple of other Catholic parishes before making an overall decision about Catholic clergy as a whole.

According to this source:
  • Those who affirm traditional theology and participate in a church (19%)
  • Those who do not affirm traditional theology but participate in a church (40%)
  • Those who do not affirm traditional theology and do not participate in a church (41%)
 
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HKDR

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The OP is vague and contains claims about statistics with no references. So far, we have opinion.

Let's see some facts and citations, and some specific examples and I may respond.
I apologize about not citing any sources but the first result for my inquiry on Google provides these statistics on retired clergy:
  • Those who affirm traditional theology and participate in a church (19%)
  • Those who do not affirm traditional theology but participate in a church (40%)
  • Those who do not affirm traditional theology and do not participate in a church (41%)
(Why some retired clergy lose faith and leave church – Baptist News Global)
 
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HKDR

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This. I agree completely.
I apologize again for not mentioning any sources, the burden of evidence is on me so that is my fault.

Very first result for "how many clergy members lose their faith": Why some retired clergy lose faith and leave church – Baptist News Global

Every subsequent result regurgitates similar statistics. Again, I didn't post this as an attack on Catholicism or anything like that, and I apologize if it seems that way. I wanted to learn a bit why Catholic worship (as ironic as it may sound) seems somewhat secular. It could just be a lack of understanding of the tradition which is what I want to believe because I look very highly upon Catholicism.

I do know I've only ever been to one cathedral but you do need to understand that I didn't grow up anywhere near Catholics and very few Christians in general (first time I went to church was in July 2023 after spending most of my life being agnostic in a relatively secular family). I just want to learn and right now I'm backtracking on some old messages so I might get that answer before you respond back to me but I think you and I can both agree that Catholic tradition has been building for 2,000 years so it's bound to be complicated. I try reading on the Holy See's website but I don't know where to start.
 
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Barna has some recent polling that 92% of Catholic clergy actually believe the creeds. A couple percent think they 'probably' believe them. Then there are six percent that are either nonbelievers or confirmed skeptics. That is too high a percentage, but less dismal than your numbers.

Catholicism isn't generally a path to atheism. If anything was a path to atheism I would guess mainline Protestant ho hum attitudes would get you there OR fundamentalist anti-intellectual attitudes when reality comes knocking and one has to decide to continue being anti-intellectual or abandon it all.

I wouldn't want to be in a parish where they didn't believe in what they preached. I'd run for the door. Happily I think that is somewhat uncommon. My parish is not at all that way, nor the other parishes I frequent from time to time. Maybe you found a real loser parish. Just saying they are definitely not all that way. Don't judge us all by this one experience.
Thank you for your detailed reply. Now this is definitely ironic of me given I personally didn't cite any sources (which I confess was a silly mistake), but I'm curious if you know off hand where I can find the information on that study. I will say though, I might have been too harsh the first few times I was there because they don't seem quite as dead as they did when I first got there. I'm slowly coming to the conclusion that the priest isn't a gifted public speaker and that the deacons aren't trying to show him off or something like that. Just my theory of course, I think my issue is that I don't know enough of Catholic tradition.
 
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PloverWing

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According to this source:
  • Those who affirm traditional theology and participate in a church (19%)
  • Those who do not affirm traditional theology but participate in a church (40%)
  • Those who do not affirm traditional theology and do not participate in a church (41%)

Thanks for the link. It could be a springboard to a whole conversation in itself. (It also helps to confirm for me that my own calling is to the laity, not the priesthood. I've wrestled with truth and doubt my whole adult life, and as a lay person, I have a freedom to explore theological questions that I think priests do not have. Again, a whole conversation...)

I'll note the author's disclaimer: "This was not a large or a scientific survey. Instead, it represents the responses of about 100 retired (almost all Mainline) clergy who read DoubtersParish.com, ProgressiveChristianity.org or Baptist News Global. In short, the responders to this survey already trend “liberal/progressive” theologically and ecclesiastically." The article, being about a small group of Mainline Protestants, may not be a good indicator of what's going on in the Catholic community.

I'm slowly coming to the conclusion that the priest isn't a gifted public speaker and that the deacons aren't trying to show him off or something like that. Just my theory of course, I think my issue is that I don't know enough of Catholic tradition.

Different people have different strengths, and it may well be that this particular priest isn't a good public speaker.

Here are a couple of thoughts on getting to know the Catholic tradition better.

1) Are there parish ministries that you could be involved in? Do they operate a soup kitchen or food pantry or homeless shelter or after-school tutoring center? In my (Episcopal) parish, there are members who aren't good at articulating their faith in words, but they'll show up every weekend at the church to hand out groceries to families in need -- they're excellent at demonstrating their faith in action. It might be informative to spend time with Catholic Christians whose faith is best expressed in actions.

2) Reading a few books by Catholic authors could help. I'm not thinking of the argumentative books so much, but rather writings that give you a glimpse of what it's like to live and experience the Catholic faith -- poetry, stories, autobiography, that kind of thing. For myself, I'd list the poetry of Gerard Manley Hopkins, The Seven Storey Mountain by Thomas Merton, Behold the Beauty of the Lord by Henri Nouwen -- some books like that. Not apologetic arguments, but people's expressions of how they've experienced God through their Catholic faith.
 
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concretecamper

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I apologize about not citing any sources but the first result for my inquiry on Google provides these statistics on retired clergy:
  • Those who affirm traditional theology and participate in a church (19%)
  • Those who do not affirm traditional theology but participate in a church (40%)
  • Those who do not affirm traditional theology and do not participate in a church (41%)
(Why some retired clergy lose faith and leave church – Baptist News Global)
Thank you for the article that never mentions the word Catholic although the title of the thread does. It seems you have an axe to grind.
 
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RileyG

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I apologize again for not mentioning any sources, the burden of evidence is on me so that is my fault.

Very first result for "how many clergy members lose their faith": Why some retired clergy lose faith and leave church – Baptist News Global

Every subsequent result regurgitates similar statistics. Again, I didn't post this as an attack on Catholicism or anything like that, and I apologize if it seems that way. I wanted to learn a bit why Catholic worship (as ironic as it may sound) seems somewhat secular. It could just be a lack of understanding of the tradition which is what I want to believe because I look very highly upon Catholicism.

I do know I've only ever been to one cathedral but you do need to understand that I didn't grow up anywhere near Catholics and very few Christians in general (first time I went to church was in July 2023 after spending most of my life being agnostic in a relatively secular family). I just want to learn and right now I'm backtracking on some old messages so I might get that answer before you respond back to me but I think you and I can both agree that Catholic tradition has been building for 2,000 years so it's bound to be complicated. I try reading on the Holy See's website but I don't know where to start.
It’s all good! God bless you!
 
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chevyontheriver

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Thank you for your detailed reply. Now this is definitely ironic of me given I personally didn't cite any sources (which I confess was a silly mistake), but I'm curious if you know off hand where I can find the information on that study.
I looked for it but can't find it now. It compared evangelical Protestant and mainline Protestant and Catholic clergy and their belief in the historic creeds. Evangelicals did pretty good, Catholics did fairly good, and mainline Protestants had a chunk of what I guess we could call non-believing clergy.
I will say though, I might have been too harsh the first few times I was there because they don't seem quite as dead as they did when I first got there. I'm slowly coming to the conclusion that the priest isn't a gifted public speaker and that the deacons aren't trying to show him off or something like that. Just my theory of course, I think my issue is that I don't know enough of Catholic tradition.
And again, not every Catholic parish is perfect. There will be a balance between cutting the clergy a break once in a while and knowing when to try a different parish. Some parishes will not fit you. Others are astoundingly good. Choose well.
 
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chevyontheriver

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I apologize again for not mentioning any sources, the burden of evidence is on me so that is my fault.

Very first result for "how many clergy members lose their faith": Why some retired clergy lose faith and leave church – Baptist News Global

Every subsequent result regurgitates similar statistics. Again, I didn't post this as an attack on Catholicism or anything like that, and I apologize if it seems that way. I wanted to learn a bit why Catholic worship (as ironic as it may sound) seems somewhat secular. It could just be a lack of understanding of the tradition which is what I want to believe because I look very highly upon Catholicism.

I do know I've only ever been to one cathedral but you do need to understand that I didn't grow up anywhere near Catholics and very few Christians in general (first time I went to church was in July 2023 after spending most of my life being agnostic in a relatively secular family). I just want to learn and right now I'm backtracking on some old messages so I might get that answer before you respond back to me but I think you and I can both agree that Catholic tradition has been building for 2,000 years so it's bound to be complicated. I try reading on the Holy See's website but I don't know where to start.
Being, or becoming Catholic is not for people scared of diving into the deep ocean. It’s not a kiddie pool three inches deep. Consequently it is hard to figure out with waves and currents and tides and thermoclines and stuff. So don’t worry that you haven’t got it all figured out. Go as slow as you need, but be prepared for a lifetime of learning. And asking questions. And alternating not getting it and having big aha moments. All the time coming closer, hopefully, to God.
 
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RileyG

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Being, or becoming Catholic is not for people scared of diving into the deep ocean. It’s not a kiddie pool three inches deep. Consequently it is hard to figure out with waves and currents and tides and thermoclines and stuff. So don’t worry that you haven’t got it all figured out. Go as slow as you need, but be prepared for a lifetime of learning. And asking questions. And alternating not getting it and having big aha moments. All the time coming closer, hopefully, to God.
Well said, sir!
 
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Valletta

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I apologize again for not mentioning any sources, the burden of evidence is on me so that is my fault.

Very first result for "how many clergy members lose their faith": Why some retired clergy lose faith and leave church – Baptist News Global

Every subsequent result regurgitates similar statistics. Again, I didn't post this as an attack on Catholicism or anything like that, and I apologize if it seems that way. I wanted to learn a bit why Catholic worship (as ironic as it may sound) seems somewhat secular. It could just be a lack of understanding of the tradition which is what I want to believe because I look very highly upon Catholicism.

I do know I've only ever been to one cathedral but you do need to understand that I didn't grow up anywhere near Catholics and very few Christians in general (first time I went to church was in July 2023 after spending most of my life being agnostic in a relatively secular family). I just want to learn and right now I'm backtracking on some old messages so I might get that answer before you respond back to me but I think you and I can both agree that Catholic tradition has been building for 2,000 years so it's bound to be complicated. I try reading on the Holy See's website but I don't know where to start.
I watch a lot of EWTN. I am sure there are shows that would hit home with you. A number of converts are interviewed, and there are Bible courses and discussions and inspiring talks galore. For Lent I usually record Father Bill Casey on EWTN, he does missions around the country, here is a sample of one of his missions on YouTube. He does speak of fallen away Catholics:
 
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