Why did God give up on me?

JesusisLord7 said:

I don´t understand why but He warned me many times because I kept doubting Him. Now I live with deep regret.

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Many of us have regrets, but it doesn't keep us from walking with Christ daily. Ok, so maybe you've tasted of the powers of the age to come. But because the taste is now gone, you think God is no longer with you? Where is your faith in His promise to never leave you? Where is your faith in the substitutionary atonement of Christ? Where is your faith in God's ability to forgive your sins? Do you measure God's forgiveness by what God's word says?

You are in a real test. I suggest you stop directing your faith toward yourself and your feelings, and start directing it toward the real Christ in heaven and toward the real word of God. "The word of God shall abide forever" it says. But our human feelings and experiences are suspect.
TD

JesusisLord7 said:

Him leaving felt like lots of power coming out of my body, wave after wave. And then something else bad coming in to destroy my own spirit and leave me empty. Everything changed about me and I felt like I hit the floor. It was more than just feelings, it was a horrible attack. It was like He was ripped out of my body entirely. I even smelt a beautiful rose fragrance leaving me, maybe the fragrance of Christ. Him leaving felt like all the goodness getting sucked out, including the life in me. My teeth feel different, my voice and my ability to sing a bit different to me. It was like being down graded.
Before, I was able to speak in tongues powerfully and now I can't.

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I had something similar happen to me too where it felt the Holy Spirit left me, it happened three times, for me it felt like he was leaving out from my chest and once I sensed a dove flying away from my chest. All three times I was in a moment of sin, like anger or disobedience or a bad thought about God. I'm still wrestling with this. It was really scary. I also felt something coming in and being empty also at one point. Everyone tells me this isn't real or true. One of the good encouragements I got was "Never ever last day, never ever last chance." I hope the fears go away for all of us struggling with this soon.

Beloved ones, weren’t you discussing your spiritual realities?

Consider what we have heard:
“Beloved, I now write to you this second epistle (in both of which I stir up your pure minds by way of reminder), that you may be mindful of the words which were spoken before by the holy prophets, and of the commandment of us, the apostles of the Lord and Savior,”
‭‭II Peter‬ ‭3:1-2‬ ‭NKJV‬‬

So what one of the holy prophet in the Holy Scriptures has spoken, this is what we heard the Lord said through prophet Nehemiah:

“but if you return to Me, and keep My commandments and do them, though some of you were cast out to the farthest part of the heavens, yet I will gather them from there, and bring them to the place which I have chosen as a dwelling for My name.’”
‭‭Nehemiah‬ ‭1:9‬ ‭NKJV‬‬

Beloved ones, were you considering that you were cast out ? Were you cast out to the farthest part of heaven ? Were you cast spiritually cast out ? Were you spiritually far from Him? Hear the word of the Lord and take heed, that is, to return to Him
and keep His commandments and do them, and yet the Lord will gather you from there, and bring you to the place which He has chosen as a dwelling for His name.

Beloved ones, return to the Lord.

To God be thanksgiving through Christ. Amen

Beloved ones, also consider what we have heard:

“For the Lord will not cast off forever. Though He causes grief,
Yet He will show compassion
According to the multitude of His mercies.
For He does not afflict willingly,
Nor grieve the children of men.”
‭‭Lamentations‬ ‭3:31-33‬ ‭NKJV‬‬

Beloved ones, though you may have been grieved and afflicted, return to your Shepherd. And perceive and understand the compassion of the Lord, that you heard, that the Lord will not cast off forever. So truly repent and be converted.

To God the Father be thanksgiving through Christ. Amen

JesusisLord7 said:

I had a fear of Holy Spirit leaving me and eventually His power really did leave and I got severely attacked by Satan, without my helmet of salvation on. I've been a fool so I deserve to suffer, but it is too much for one to bear.

I am just young and have my whole life to live, how can I live it without Him?
I am an evangelist and was ready to win 1,000's to the faith.

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When did God move toward us to save us from our sins? When we were good people already, living holy, Christ-centered lives? Nope. When we were rebellious, sinful, unholy people, mired in wickedness, bound under the power of the World, the Flesh and the devil (Ephesians 2:1-3). Our sin did not keep God from us. If it could do this, if sin could keep God from us, no one would ever be saved! But God is far, far greater than our sin and made a way for us to know and walk with Him, fouled by evil though we are.

Romans 5:6-8
6 For when we were yet without strength, in due time Christ died for the ungodly.
7 For scarcely for a righteous man will one die: yet perhaps for a good man some would even dare to die.
8 But God commends his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.

Titus 3:3-7
3 For we ourselves also were sometimes foolish, disobedient, deceived, serving various lusts and pleasures, living in malice and envy, hateful, and hating one another.
4 But after that the kindness and love of God our Saviour toward man appeared,
5 Not by works of righteousness which we have done, but according to his mercy he saved us, by the washing of regeneration, and renewing of the Holy Ghost;
6 Which he shed on us abundantly through Jesus Christ our Saviour;
7 That being justified by his grace, we should be made heirs according to the hope of eternal life.

1 John 4:10
10 Herein is love, not that we loved God, but that he loved us, and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins.

If God was so determined to save us from ourselves, moving past our sinful filthiness to retrieve us from the darkness and terrible penalty of our sin, why do you think His Spirit, the Holy Spirit, is less determined, less resolved, less committed to you than God the Father is? Why do you believe the Spirit has left you when God has gone to the incredible lengths He has to bring you into relationship with Himself? Why would God do all He has done through the life, death and resurrection of Jesus to save you from your sins and then drop you when you go awry as one of His children, removing His Spirit from you? That's not the God I see revealed in the Bible. Instead, I see a God who is just as faithful and persistent after He saves us as He is in order to bring us to salvation.

Hebrews 13:5-6
5 ...be content with what you have, for he has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.”
6 So we can confidently say, “The Lord is my helper; I will not fear...

Romans 8:31-39
31 What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us?
32 He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things?
33 Who shall bring any charge against God’s elect? It is God who justifies.
34 Who is to condemn? Christ Jesus is the one who died—more than that, who was raised—who is at the right hand of God, who indeed is interceding for us.
35 Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword?
36 As it is written, “For your sake we are being killed all the day long; we are regarded as sheep to be slaughtered.”
37 No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us.
38 For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers,
39 nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.

The devil only gets a crack at us by God's permission. The devil could not abuse Job except by God's agreement; Satan could not "sift Peter like wheat" just as he liked, but had to ask God for the freedom to do so. But this means God has a good purpose in allowing such a thing. Sometimes, He is showing us where we're really at with Him, removing our illusions about our walk with Him. Other times, He's giving us cause to crowd up closer to Him than we have been doing, depending upon Him more fully than is our normal habit. Still other times, God is simply helping us to train deeply into ourselves spiritual reflexes of submission, a constant, God-centered focus, an attitude of prayer and the use of Scripture as our "sword" in spiritual warfare. At bottom, in all things, God is seeking to make us more like Jesus. (Romans 8:29)

Anyway, the great wonder of walking with God is that He doesn't ever give us what we really deserve. If He did, we'd all of us be in hell. Instead of casting us all straight into the torment of eternal punishment for our sins against Him, He bent down low to us, in His Son taking on our form, the form of a servant, and then died at the hands of wicked men for your sin and mine (Philippians 2:5-8). What amazing grace and love God has shown to us! What mercy, and patience, and compassion! This is the God who is your Heavenly Father, not the one you seem to have taken up who leaves you when you don't step just right, exposing you to the attack of the Evil One.

God doesn't just save you, then, but persists with you, knowing you are utterly weak without Him, unable to be who He wants you to be in your own power. And so, when you trust in Christ as your Saviour and Lord, God places you in him, in Christ, who becomes for you a "High Priest," who mediates between you and God, your Advocate with the Father.

Hebrews 4:13-16
13 Neither is there any creature that is not manifest in his sight: but all things are naked and opened unto the eyes of him with whom we have to do.
14 Seeing then that we have a great high priest, that is passed into the heavens, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold fast our profession.
15 For we have not an high priest which cannot be touched with the feeling of our infirmities; but was in all points tempted like as we are, yet without sin.
16 Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need.

1 Timothy 2:5
5 For there is one God, and there is one mediator between God and men, the man Christ Jesus,

1 John 2:1
1 My little children, I am writing these things to you so that you may not sin. But if anyone does sin, we have an advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous.

It is because you are in Jesus, "clothed" in him (Romans 13:14), that God accepts you (Ephesians 1:6). And because Jesus is perfect, those in him are also declared perfect by God ("justified) and accepted by Him. Your acceptance by God, then, doesn't rest on you, on your ability to live right, but on Jesus and only on him. What, then, of your idea that the Holy Spirit has left you, abandoned you, because you have sinned? How does this square with all that I've pointed out to you above?

One other thing: While you may have an evangelistic gift, it is ALWAYS and ONLY God who saves people (2 Timothy 2:25; John 6:44). You are merely a "signpost," pointing the way to God. It seems, though, that you don't yet fully understand the Gospel and what being saved means, so don't rush into evangelism. It was nearly twenty years after his experience on the Damascus Road before the apostle Paul was ready to serve God in the Early Church. Only when we are well-settled into Christ and spiritually mature are we of much use to God. Be patient, then; God would make you into a "mighty oak," not a squash. It takes decades for a mighty oak to develop, however - unlike a squash that grows to full size in about four months. Which would you rather be?

JesusisLord7 said:

For it is impossible for those who were once enlightened, and have tasted of the heavenly gift, and were made partakers of the Holy Ghost, And have tasted the good word of God, and the powers of the world to come, If they shall fall away, to renew them again unto repentance; seeing they crucify to themselves the Son of God afresh, and put him to an open shame. Hebrews 6:4-6

Take heed, brethren, lest there be in any of you an evil heart of unbelief, in departing from the living God. Hebrews 3:12

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Hebrews 6:4-6 is properly understood in its immediate context, starting in the previous chapter that is addressing immature believers (Hebrews 5:12-14), and extending beyond verse 6 of chapter 6 to verse 12. Those who are described in verses 4-6 of chapter 6 are set in contrast to the merely immature believers being addressed (vs. 4 "those" and 9 "in your case"). It isn't just immature believers, then, who are in view in verses 4-6 but false brethren, "tares" Jesus called them, participating in the life and work of the Church, experiencing in a second-hand way the power of the Spirit, having heard and been enlightened to the truth of the Gospel, but yet not actually saved. And because these people are false believers, because they aren't truly saved, often they fall away, exhausted by the effort of trying to live the Christian life apart from the Power Source of such a life: the Holy Spirit. What's worse, these false brethren gain a sort of "inoculation" against the Gospel, having heard and understood it but not having exerted saving faith in it. They are inured to the Gospel by their proximity to it while remaining untouched by its life-giving truth and so, in time, are made unable to change their minds - repent - about the Gospel, unable to see it as anything more than a set of curious, impotent, religious ideas. But these are unsaved folk set in contrast to those who are spiritual "milk drinkers" but are actually saved.

Hebrews 6:4-6, then, ought not to be applied to genuine Christians. The passage isn't about them.

Hebrews 3:12 is also not indicating a possible loss of one's salvation, which is understood by remembering that, although the Israelites in their hearts of unbelief toward God had departed from Him, He did not depart from them. Even though they were kept from the Promised Land as a result of their unbelief, God continued to move with them in the wilderness, providing for and protecting His Chosen People. So, too, with truly born-again children of God who wander from Him, failing to fully trust in His promises to them. The Good Shepherd goes out and retrieves his lost sheep because it is his sheep. He does not leave one of his own wandering in the darkness of the wilderness, cut off from him forever.

JesusisLord7 said:

Him leaving felt like lots of power coming out of my body, wave after wave. And then something else bad coming in to destroy my own spirit and leave me empty. Everything changed about me and I felt like I hit the floor. It was more than just feelings, it was a horrible attack. It was like He was ripped out of my body entirely. I even smelt a beautiful rose fragrance leaving me, maybe the fragrance of Christ. Him leaving felt like all the goodness getting sucked out, including the life in me. My teeth feel different, my voice and my ability to sing a bit different to me. It was like being down graded.
Before, I was able to speak in tongues powerfully and now I can't.

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Your feelings and experiences don't trump God's word, however strong your experiences may be to you. There is nothing in God's word that supports what you describe here; but there is much in the Bible that confounds it. What will you believe? What you feel and experience? Or what God has said?

This was the same decision that confronted the Israelites at the borders of the land of Canaan, the Promised Land. They saw the great cities and formidable inhabitants of the land and were powerfully afraid of them. Even though God had said the land was theirs, that He had given it to His Chosen People, the Israelites went instead with their experience, with what they saw and felt, rather than with what God had declared to be true. And they spent the rest of their lives wandering in the wilderness, as a result.

You are doing the very same thing, putting your experience above God's word, above His promises to you in Scripture. And you will dwell in a spiritual wilderness so long as you do - as you have already discovered.

JesusisLord7 said:

I had a fear of Holy Spirit leaving me and eventually His power really did leave and I got severely attacked by Satan, without my helmet of salvation on. I've been a fool so I deserve to suffer, but it is too much for one to bear.

I am just young and have my whole life to live, how can I live it without Him?
I am an evangelist and was ready to win 1,000's to the faith.

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I dont belive He left you, Holy Spirit is not just a feeling, your feelings can lie to you, maybe God is just being quiet to teach you something, be sure that He who began a good work in you will finish it. Dont lose hope and faith. Also read Galatians, you have received Holy Spirit by faith and was sealed.

JesusisLord7 said:

I had a fear of Holy Spirit leaving me and eventually His power really did leave and I got severely attacked by Satan, without my helmet of salvation on. I've been a fool so I deserve to suffer, but it is too much for one to bear.

I am just young and have my whole life to live, how can I live it without Him?
I am an evangelist and was ready to win 1,000's to the faith.

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You may be being tested through fiery trials to bring you closer to GOD.

I was walking in the Spirit strongly at one point so much so that a church person told me she could see it in me. Everyday and throughout the day for quite some time I was involved in the word of GOD, praying and learning more than ever before.

This has since been back and forth. I think when you get closer to GOD you experience fiery trials but once you overcome with GOD's help you become stronger in certain areas of your life. I think this continues so you develop more and more in holiness.

By the way you don't win anyone to the faith, GOD does. This is your pride and may be one of the reasons you are struggling. Remember everything good in your life and any good you do is through the power of GOD not of yourself.

Ask for wisdom from above and learn to wait on GOD and humble yourself before HIM. Take care brother in your trials, tribulations and hardships and remember all the apostles suffered.

Peace be with all those in the Body of Christ.

aiki said:

Your feelings and experiences don't trump God's word, however strong your experiences may be to you. There is nothing in God's word that supports what you describe here; but there is much in the Bible that confounds it. What will you believe? What you feel and experience? Or what God has said?

This was the same decision that confronted the Israelites at the borders of the land of Canaan, the Promised Land. They saw the great cities and formidable inhabitants of the land and were powerfully afraid of them. Even though God had said the land was theirs, that He had given it to His Chosen People, the Israelites went instead with their experience, with what they saw and felt, rather than with what God had declared to be true. And they spent the rest of their lives wandering in the wilderness, as a result.

You are doing the very same thing, putting your experience above God's word, above His promises to you in Scripture. And you will dwell in a spiritual wilderness so long as you do - as you have already discovered.

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Great advice!

JesusisLord7 said:

I had a fear of Holy Spirit leaving me and eventually His power really did leave and I got severely attacked by Satan, without my helmet of salvation on. I've been a fool so I deserve to suffer, but it is too much for one to bear.

I am just young and have my whole life to live, how can I live it without Him?
I am an evangelist and was ready to win 1,000's to the faith.

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He is just one prayer away.
But it's a hard one of submission.
- Answered Prayer - God heard your prayer