Why Are Christians More Receptive to Divorce Than Polygamy?

[Kukus]

Why is it that Christians are more receptive to a man who has divorced his wife and remarried, or a woman who has divorced her husband and remarried, but very unreceptive to a man having two or more wives?

People who have divorced and remarried work as pastors and elders without any problem, regardless of whose fault it was for the divorce. Even the vague "Incompatibility" is becoming increasingly tolerated. However, the marriage of two wives, which unlike divorce and remarriage after divorce, has neither been condemned nor discouraged in the Bible, is frowned upon?

Is this a case where the traditions of man make the word of God to be of not effect? Mark 7:13

 

[grasping the after wind]

Why is it that Christians are more receptive to a man who has divorced his wife and remarried, or a woman who has divorced her husband and remarried, but very unreceptive to a man having two or more wives?

People who have divorced and remarried work as pastors and elders without any problem, regardless of whose fault it was for the divorce. Even the vague "Incompatibility" is becoming increasingly tolerated. However, the marriage of two wives, which unlike divorce and remarriage after divorce, has neither been condemned nor discouraged in the Bible, is frowned upon?

Is this a case where the traditions of man make the word of God to be of not effect? Mark 7:13

I believe it is a case in which human morality is the guide more than biblical morality. Like you, I know of nowhere in the Bible where polygamy is condemned. Also I do not know why polygamy ought to be represented only as a case of multiple wives. If a woman should have multiple husbands that would fit the definition of polygamy as well. All that being said, if the prevailing government has decided that polygamy is not an option, a good Christian will adhere to the secular law even if it seems a strange place to draw the line in comparison to other relationships the secular law allows because adhering to that law is not morally wrong while violating a secular law that is not morally wrong is itself morally wrong. The only time one is justified in violating secular law is when it is in contradiction to actual Christian morality. And even then one will be subject to the consequences that the secular government will impose upon one for violating their law.

 

[Rubiks]

For one, the verses on when divorce is permitted are very open to interpretation.

Does "permitted because of the hardness of the heart" mean divorce is in fact (as it literally suggests) permissible? Is it only remarriage that is condemned here? Does the sexual immorality exception in Matthew 5:32 extend to the entirety of verse 32 or just the "divorcing his wife" clause?

There also verses like Luke 18:29 which seem to be encouraging divorce in certain cases.

Also some have used a very vague notion of "sexual immorality" in Matthew 5:32 (contrary to popular belief, it does not say "adultery") to allow a loophole for divorce and remarriage on demand, essential. But can this view easily be proven wrong?

 

[Rubiks]

Why is it that Christians are more receptive to a man who has divorced his wife and remarried, or a woman who has divorced her husband and remarried, but very unreceptive to a man having two or more wives?

People who have divorced and remarried work as pastors and elders without any problem, regardless of whose fault it was for the divorce. Even the vague "Incompatibility" is becoming increasingly tolerated. However, the marriage of two wives, which unlike divorce and remarriage after divorce, has neither been condemned nor discouraged in the Bible, is frowned upon?

Is this a case where the traditions of man make the word of God to be of not effect? Mark 7:13

Not only is polygamy not condemned, it is explicitly permitted in Exodus 21:10.

 

[Albion]

Polygamy was permitted in Old Testament times, but it was never God's ideal. In the New Testament, however, we find it flatly rejected. See Romans 7:1-3; marriage to another person while the first spouse is living is deemed to be adultery. Neither a fornicator or an adulterer shall inherit the kingdom of God -- 1 Corinthians 6:9-10.

In 1 Corinthians 7:2 we see, “Let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.” Polygamy is therefore rejected.

 

[He-rat of the Circus-mice]

Polygamy was permitted in Old Testament times, but it was never God's ideal. In the New Testament, however, we find it flatly rejected. See Romans 7:1-3; marriage to another person while the first spouse is living is deemed to be adultery. Neither a fornicator or an adulterer shall inherit the kingdom of God -- 1 Corinthians 6:9-10.

In 1 Corinthians 7:2 we see, “Let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.” Polygamy is therefore rejected.

I think the point was that divorce is explicitly prohibited in numerous places, but polygamy is essentially advised against once (?) in the passage you quoted. Yet Christians seem quite content with the more seriously condemned sin, yet take very seriously the lesser evil.

I hadn't actually realised this apparent hypocrisy before, until it was stated plainly here.

 

[Albion]

I think the point was that divorce is explicitly prohibited in numerous places, but polygamy is essentially advised against once (?) in- the passage you quoted.

I don't think so. You cannot separate polygamy from adultery, not based upon Scripture. Therefore, it is hardly true that polygamy is "advised against" only once.

Yet Christians seem quite content with the more seriously condemned sin, yet take very seriously the lesser evil.

Why should Christians take more seriously what you consider the greater evil? The issue is adultery, right? Well then, every polygamous union falls under the same condemnation and the main reason that divorced persons seem in practice to be tolerated more than people in a polygamous relationship is because we do not (in our society) have any of the latter!

Not unless you are speaking of some cult in the deserts of Utah or some commune, that is. But not in the everyday goings-on of the typical Christian denomination. But were a bunch of polygamous families to apply for membership in your local Lutheran, Presbyterian, or Baptist church, I am sure you would see the situation change.

 

[Kukus]

I believe it is a case in which human morality is the guide more than biblical morality. Like you, I know of nowhere in the Bible where polygamy is condemned. Also I do not know why polygamy ought to be represented only as a case of multiple wives. If a woman should have multiple husbands that would fit the definition of polygamy as well. All that being said, if the prevailing government has decided that polygamy is not an option, a good Christian will adhere to the secular law even if it seems a strange place to draw the line in comparison to other relationships the secular law allows because adhering to that law is not morally wrong while violating a secular law that is not morally wrong is itself morally wrong. The only time one is justified in violating secular law is when it is in contradiction to actual Christian morality. And even then one will be subject to the consequences that the secular government will impose upon one for violating their law.

Polygamy in this context means a man marrying more than one wife aka polgny. A married woman having more than one sexual partner is adultery. As for the law, the govt prohibits a person from having more than one marriage license at the same time. it doesn't prohibit marriage to to wives.

What if i live in a country where polygamy is expressly allowed? Why do Christians still find divorce to be more acceptable?

 

[Kukus]

Polygamy was permitted in Old Testament times, but it was never God's ideal. In the New Testament, however, we find it flatly rejected. See Romans 7:1-3; marriage to another person while the first spouse is living is deemed to be adultery. Neither a fornicator or an adulterer shall inherit the kingdom of God -- 1 Corinthians 6:9-10.

In 1 Corinthians 7:2 we see, “Let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.” Polygamy is therefore rejected.

There is nowhere that polygamy has been potrayed less than ideal. People were even commanded to marry the wife if a dead brother and being already married was never an excuse.

The verse in Romans talks about the woman and not the man.

 

[Albion]

Polygamy in this context means a man marrying more than one wife aka polgny. A married woman having more than one sexual partner is adultery.

That's interesting and based upon modern societal concepts, but the Scriptures themselves are not reflective of it. See 1 Corinthians 7:2 for instance.

What if i live in a country where polygamy is expressly allowed? Why do Christians still find divorce to be more acceptable?

Not being a resident of such a country, I cannot comment on that or even affirm that what you describe is in fact true. I would, for one thing, have to know which Christians in those countries are being described.​

 

[Kukus]

I don't think so. You cannot separate polygamy from adultery, not based upon Scripture. Therefore, it is hardly true that polygamy is "advised against" only once.


Why should Christians take more seriously what you consider the greater evil? The issue is adultery, right? Well then, every polygamous union falls under the same condemnation and the main reason that divorced persons seem in practice to be tolerated more than people in a polygamous relationship is because we do not (in our society) have any of the latter!

Not unless you are speaking of some cult in the deserts of Utah or some commune, that is. But not in the everyday goings-on of the typical Christian denomination. But were a bunch of polygamous families to apply for membership in your local Lutheran, Presbyterian, or Baptist church, I am sure you would see the situation change.

I think, this is a point that needs to be discussed. At no point did God in the Old testament say that he hated polygyny, in Malachi he said that he hated divorce. If anything, he told David that he is the one who gave him his WIVES. He went further to tell him that he would have added him more if he felt the ones he had were too few; would God support Adultery which he rejected in the Old Testament?

When it comes to the new testament, the issue of plygyny was never spoken against but the teaching on divorce was quite clear cut.

The issue is not whether one is more evil than the other (of which i think divorce is) , but why people find it more acceptable to tolerate one which has been EXPRESSLY forbidden, and revolt against that which is not and which was even encouraged in the OT

 

[Albion]

When it comes to the new testament, the issue of plygyny was never spoken against but the teaching on divorce was quite clear cut.

Read 1 Corinthians 7:2.

 

[FireDragon76]

Polygamy does not fit with western ideals of egalitarian relationships, it implies ownership of women.

Having said that, in the past missionaries dealing with different cultural contexts in Africa have been willing to make concessions in the interests of not tearing communities apart. But acceptance should not be confused with affirmation.

 

[Dkh587]

Polygamy is definitely permitted in the scriptures, but for most people, their financial and living situations cannot support it.

 

[Kukus]

How do you justify that statement, from Scripture? It is one thig just to make a declaration. Can you substantiate that?

Polygamy is permitted the same way Marriage is permitted. Is there a place why you'll find polygamy prohibited?

 

[Dkh587]

How do you justify that statement, from Scripture? It is one thig just to make a declaration. Can you substantiate that?

Yes - God never forbid polygamy, and many of the patriarchs had multiple wives and concubines.

Jacob was married to 2 sisters, and had the nation of Israel through them & their 2 concubines. Even God was “married” to 2 sisters: Israel & Judah...

Does God ever say that multiple wives is a sin?

 

[thecolorsblend]

Why do Christians still find divorce to be more acceptable?

Monogamy is something that most westerners can easily wrap their heads around. The current generations were raised by Baby Boomers who turned divorce into an art form. Divorce is something the majority of society has been desensitized to.

Polygamy is shocking because of how unusual it is. Also, I can't help thinking that a lot of men are probably intimidated by having to memorize that many birthdays, anniversaries, wedding dates, etc. It's bothersome on every level.

Polygamy does not fit with western ideals of egalitarian relationships, it implies ownership of women.

Realistically, even monogamous marriage was ownership of a woman. It's baked into the western understanding of marriage. All of it is the handing over of property from one owner to another.

That's why it's always funny when feminists say they want their fathers to walk them down the aisle. I don't think they understand the property-exchange symbolism they're demanding. I choose not to tell them about that until after the ceremony is over. "Wow, I'm really surprised you did that, it seemed really patriarchal".

 

[FireDragon76]

Monogamy is something that most westerners can easily wrap their heads around. The current generations were raised by Baby Boomers who turned divorce into an art form. Divorce is something the majority of society has been desensitized to.

Polygamy is shocking because of how unusual it is. Also, I can't help thinking that a lot of men are probably intimidated by having to memorize that many birthdays, anniversaries, wedding dates, etc. It's bothersome on every level.

This one got me laughing, because it's true.

 

[ewq1938]

Why is it that Christians are more receptive to a man who has divorced his wife and remarried, or a woman who has divorced her husband and remarried, but very unreceptive to a man having two or more wives?

Seems that the potential to have sexual relations with multiple women is considered more immoral than ending a relationship where one or both parties are unhappily married.

 

[ewq1938]

Not only is polygamy not condemned, it is explicitly permitted in Exodus 21:10.

That has no bearing on Christians under a different covenant. The NT only promotes one husband and one wife.