Why am I thinking about her?

[NoName12]

I am 20 and I have latly bin having these intens sexaul fantasys about a old friend of mine who I have not seen or heard from in years. We have not seen one onther in a vary long time But for some reason I have bin hit with vary intess sexaul thoughts about her. There has to be somthing wrong with what I am doing here and would like advice on how to stop the fantays, I mean we use to be freinds and nothing ever romanitc every happen between us I really doudt anthing every would happen if we met aghen for so many reasons, ( for starters she is at least 10 years older then me, we were on differnt sides the subject of poltical views, I doudt she would feel anything special for me and most inportialy we HAVE NOT SEEN OR HEARD FROM ONE ANOTHER IN YEARS!! so why am I thinking this way now?

Can any one give me advice or even why they think I bin thinking this way now?

 

[Akathist]

Hi noname. I can't say why you are having these thoughts now. My guess and it is only a guess is that something has reminded you of her and for some reason your lustful ideas were converted over to her.

One of the wierd things about our minds and memories is that they are not filed in chronological order or alphabetically. Our memories are stored based on things that are similar in some way. This is why I think something has triggered a memory.

I had a boy friend in college with really wild hair and he used a black "pick" to deal with it. He thought this pick was "fashionable" or "said something" and around the dorm he would wear it in his hair just sticking out. He was abusive to me. There was a time I was in a dollar store and needed some rubberbands for my hair. I noticed a black pick like he used to use and that night I had a nightmare about him. See?

I wonder if your memory has been jogged by something related to her, maybe something related to another girlfriend that you did have lustful thoughts about? Or maybe some old porn you have seen before. (It is very hard to get those images out of our minds!)

I suggest that each time you have a lustful memory of her, that you immediately get out your bible and start to read it and that you pray. This is the only way I know of to fight against lustful thoughts effectively. (Another less effective but similar method is to yell "Stop" inside your head and try to distract yourself.)

 

[NoName12]

Hi noname. I can't say why you are having these thoughts now. My guess and it is only a guess is that something has reminded you of her and for some reason your lustful ideas were converted over to her.

One of the wierd things about our minds and memories is that they are not filed in chronological order or alphabetically. Our memories are stored based on things that are similar in some way. This is why I think something has triggered a memory.

I had a boy friend in college with really wild hair and he used a black "pick" to deal with it. He thought this pick was "fashionable" or "said something" and around the dorm he would wear it in his hair just sticking out. He was abusive to me. There was a time I was in a dollar store and needed some rubberbands for my hair. I noticed a black pick like he used to use and that night I had a nightmare about him. See?

I wonder if your memory has been jogged by something related to her, maybe something related to another girlfriend that you did have lustful thoughts about? Or maybe some old porn you have seen before. (It is very hard to get those images out of our minds!)

I suggest that each time you have a lustful memory of her, that you immediately get out your bible and start to read it and that you pray. This is the only way I know of to fight against lustful thoughts effectively. (Another less effective but similar method is to yell "Stop" inside your head and try to distract yourself.)

You might be right, reacently we did hear from her because her sister (who was also a friend of our famliy) was allmost killed and lost her home ( and the freind I am talking about could be in danger to). I have bin praying for them both for a while now, could this have some how trigger my fantasys? But why are they sexaul? We never got involed with each other like that I dont belive we ever will.

Dose this make me a bad friend?

 

[Akathist]

You might be right, reacently we did hear from her because her sister (who was also a friend of our famliy) was allmost killed and lost her home ( and the freind I am talking about could be in danger to). I have bin praying for them both for a while now, could this have some how trigger my fantasys? But why are they sexaul? We never got involed with each other like that I dont belive we ever will.

Dose this make me a bad friend?

How could thoughts that you don't even want make you a bad friend! No way! The fact that they bother you shows what a good friend you are!

I still think that you are moving lustful thoughts you might have had about another girlfriend or a person you saw in porn to this person because they have recently come to your mind.

Praying for her is a great way to cope. I don't know why I didn't think of that!

I am not any kind of expert on such things but sometimes I think we are spiritually attacked in our dreams and "fantasies" and maybe this is happening. That is why praying for her is a good counter attack!

I had nightmares that I was walking down the stairs of my church and this "person" in a hooded outfit pushed me down the stairs. Everyone was worried about me as I fell in a heap in the fellowship hall and then they all thought I was crazy when I asked about the hooded guy who pushed me. It was a nightmare but I couldn't get it out of my head. It effected me when I was at church even, in a distracting way. I felt it was a spiritual battle to distract me from my prayers at church. When I told a close mentor of mine about them and they agreed to pray for me the nightmare stopped (I was getting it every night and then thinking about it during the next day.)

Prayer is very very powerful! And so is talking to someone in real life who you trust about things (another Christian) and having them pray with you and for you!

 

[TheWakeUpCaller]

I notied all your reasons for nothing ever happening between you and your friend. What I did not see bothers me. Many of the people I work with get their passions confused. Could there be a bad relationship between you and your Mother or Father? Several people have these problems from not developing their relationship with the opposite sex as they grow older, mainly their father. They need both parents to learn the lessons of life. I suggest if you are having feelings at all for the same sex, that you need to pray hard without ceasing, and talk to someone who will listen. This is very dangerous ground to be on. The devil twists feelings of love into something sinful, and makes it wicked. I hope that God surely helps and blesses you. If you need to talk please feel free to pm me. I am a mental health nurse and will do my best to help you. michael

 

[NoName12]

I notied all your reasons for nothing ever happening between you and your friend. What I did not see bothers me. Many of the people I work with get their passions confused. Could there be a bad relationship between you and your Mother or Father? Several people have these problems from not developing their relationship with the opposite sex as they grow older, mainly their father. They need both parents to learn the lessons of life. I suggest if you are having feelings at all for the same sex, that you need to pray hard without ceasing, and talk to someone who will listen. This is very dangerous ground to be on. The devil twists feelings of love into something sinful, and makes it wicked. I hope that God surely helps and blesses you. If you need to talk please feel free to pm me. I am a mental health nurse and will do my best to help you. michael

Wait, What do you mean by same by same sex?

 

[2401 Penitent Tangent]

I am 20 and I have latly bin having these intens sexaul fantasys about a old friend of mine who I have not seen or heard from in years. We have not seen one onther in a vary long time But for some reason I have bin hit with vary intess sexaul thoughts about her. There has to be somthing wrong with what I am doing here and would like advice on how to stop the fantays, I mean we use to be freinds and nothing ever romanitc every happen between us I really doudt anthing every would happen if we met aghen for so many reasons, ( for starters she is at least 10 years older then me, we were on differnt sides the subject of poltical views, I doudt she would feel anything special for me and most inportialy we HAVE NOT SEEN OR HEARD FROM ONE ANOTHER IN YEARS!! so why am I thinking this way now?

Can any one give me advice or even why they think I bin thinking this way now?

These thoughts obviously aren't right and should be there. Whenever you feel these thoughts coming on, just reach out the the Lord and focus on him instead. Read the bible, pray, or worship. It doesn't matter, just get your mind off those thoughts and onto the Lord.

 

[radhead]

It's possible that you have recently grown or matured in some area, or discovered something about yourself, and then you realized that you are attracted to some quality that she has, subconsciously.