Where Do Threads Go to Die?

[Travelers.Soul]

On a silly note....

Have you ever seen a thread and thought..."why won't this subject just die?!" or maybe you've created a thread and it lived for a short time only to die a tragic death? Perhaps you had a favorite thread that died slowly and was never successfully resuscitated? So where do threads go to die and what happens to them?

I highly recommend all answers be as ridiculous as possible.

 

[SnowyMacie]

If they were good threads, they go to "Thread Heaven" where they live out their true purposes and never go off-top or have trolls, and the discussion never ends. Bad threads go to "Thread Hell" where there's nothing but trolls that never stay on topic.

 

[Saucy]

I think I killed more threads than anyone on CF. I was the king of splitting (back when they could split!) it was a fun competition to see who could split a thread and be the first poster.

I like to think that the threads don't die. They just go to thread purgatory until 8 years from now when someone will resurrect it haha

 

[Saucy]

If they were good threads, they go to "Thread Heaven" where they live out their true purposes and never go off-top or have trolls, and the discussion never ends. Bad threads go to "Thread Hell" where there's nothing but trolls that never stay on topic.

Thread Valhalla?

 

[leothelioness]

I think I killed more threads than anyone on CF. I was the king of splitting (back when they could split!) it was a fun competition to see who could split a thread and be the first poster.

I like to think that the threads don't die. They just go to thread purgatory until 8 years from now when someone will resurrect it haha

That last point is spot on.

 

[LoveDivine]

Just so everyone knows my and @Saucy 's combined fitness and soda thread, shall never die

 

[Saucy]

Just so everyone knows my and @Saucy 's combined fitness and soda thread, shall never die

we'll all be 20 pounds and still try to keep it going.

 

[Travelers.Soul]

So basically we will all be dead...

 

[LoveDivine]

So basically we will all be dead....hahahaha.

It's a suicide mission of sorts. We sacrifice our lives to keep the thread going

 

[Gnarwhal]

Eventually they all end up here:

 

[High Fidelity]

"Will they like me if..."

Spoiler

 

[Deadworm]

I have started controversial threads and expressed what I thought was the last word on an issue. Like-minded trolls have joined me and supported my ravings--and thus I felt good about myself! Thus, my thread quietly drifted into blissful oblivion. After a couple of months, some arrogant troll dares to restart my topic, as if I never posted and overlooks all my precious points! I think to myself, "Doesn't he realize that on the Day of Judgment, my thread will be reproduced for him and he will be held accountable for why he didn't thoroughly search CF for God's answers to his questions?" Thus, I feel a righteous indignation that is most pleasing to God. Then I stew over whether I should repeat some of my past threads, but hesitate because I have already been wickedly accused of retreading my old stuff. O the pain! Why can't newbie posters just bow deferentially to my searing logic and be done with that topic? Sigh!

Some threads attract only Fundies and quickly gain a narrow-minded consensus. But then some trolling Libbie tracks them down and feels outrage at their mindless prooftesting or utter lack of political correctness. God calls him to resurrect the thread, that it might be held up to loving scorn. Then, like flies to fly paper, more Libbies are drawn to the resurrected thread and they vent their unbiblical screed until all dissent seems squashed and they feel very righteous. But then, a few months later, a newbie educated Fundie stumbles on to the old thread and cries out, "This shall not stand!" And soon Fundie minions swarm like vultures to set the smug Libbies straight and, properly chastened, the groupie Libbies go whimpering home to Momma! Thus, the thread dies and receives a proper burial.

 

[Sketcher]

Old threads never die. They just fade away until someone brings them back 5+ years later for no good reason.

 

[CodyFaith]

Nicolas Cage takes them to the afterlife