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Where do the single Christians hangout?
- Thread starter Shadolus
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dayhiker
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Ya, that is a tough one. Most Christian forums have quite a few people posting, but when you spread that out over the world or even your home country, that usually means a long distance to where they are.
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Nom De Guerre
Who amongst you doesn't see life as permanent?
yeah, most of the ladies here are pretty far apart from one another; same with the guys I presume.
Some people have transitioned themselves from online/LD to marriage though, and that's at least somewhat promising to somebody who's certainly willing to go through those avenues.
Some people have transitioned themselves from online/LD to marriage though, and that's at least somewhat promising to somebody who's certainly willing to go through those avenues.
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Well, I've been asking the same questions and I think that at the obvious places, you find a concentration of single Christians. Any other place will just be random.
As for God having people's paths cross... can't say. It's like asking is every man meant for one woman alone (and vice-versa) according to God's purpose or are we to choose?
And talking to anyone that shows interest is a no for me because I've had to say no to a lot of guys because I eventually found out that they were not Christians + the closer the 2 of you get, the harder it is to say no.
Well, I don't think I've been of help to you... just hope the questions will be answered
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- May 4, 2009
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Of course you were. It is hard to understand all life's questions such as those, though the Bible does give us some insight through scriptures.
Probably a good idea would be to ask married Christians and see what they went through. All I know is that it is takes some major faith to get through those lonely times, as it usually draws singles closer to God.
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HighwayMan
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I don't know. I'm starting to think dating sites really are the best bet. It'd be awesome to run into someone, pick up her books and go from there, but 'them times be a changin'.
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E
Edwards1984
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Outside of church and the church's activities, I don't think there's any real "place" single Christians hang out. You can probably try going to Christian concerts or hitting the local Lifeway, but I don't think you can really try to force a girl to come to you. God will bring your perfect wife to you one way or another.
Indeed, people as a whole are becoming more and more socially awkward or inept.
Indeed, people as a whole are becoming more and more socially awkward or inept.
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Tamara224
Well-Known Member
If you don't even talk to them, how do you know they're NOT Christian?
Christian girls go bowling too, ya know.
My advice is to expand your options with regard to how you treat women. You can have friendships with non-Christian women. Quit treating every chance meeting with a female as if she must fall into one of only two categories (potential mate or complete stranger). Just because you talk to a woman for a few minutes doesn't mean you have to ask her out or get in a relationship with her. If a woman catches your eye, talk to her. Make a new friend. If it turns out that she's not a Christian, and therefore not date material, at least you have a friend. And for all you know, her best friend or cousin or roommate is a Christian.
Christians who will only date/marry Christians have a tougher time of finding someone. We have to cast our nets a little wider. Ruling out a person just because you happen to see her at a bowling ally instead of in Sunday school is arbitrarily and foolishly limiting your choices.
Be open minded about where, when and how you might meet someone.
Oh, and BTW, if a girl is "glaring" at you, she's not interested. Gazing and staring may be signs of interest, but glaring is not.
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Tehchad
YOU! are awesome!
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on a Christian forum?
OP,
My approach, and this will not work for everyone, is to be more focused on my service than anything else. It gives me something to think about, work on, and be passionate about. Then a girl could catch my eye - they're good at catching a man's eye I hear!
My Sundays recently have been occupied by directing the "Celebrations" aka church services on Sunday mornings. But one thing I always look forward to is the break between services when I can go refill my coffee and hug Katie. She does "Seed Company" aka the little kids. She's never there before I am and I'm focused on getting things running from 730a on. She arrives much later, but I still find her in the crowd of Sunday morning.
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memoriesbymichelle
Senior Veteran
I don't think there are "places" that only christian single girls go or men for that matter. God can arrange you to meet anywhere, really. I'm not encouraging anyone to "try" this cuz at the time I certainly wasn't "trying" to meet only a Christian guy, but if it's any consolation, the place I ended up meeting my husband? a bar! And when we met, we became friends, and then started going to a Singles Bible study together and eventually we got married. But yeah, I NEVER would have thought I would meet my future husband in a place like that, but God had other plans LOL. So I agree with Tamara, quit "trying" to go to "certain" hangouts and looking at every opportunity to "meet a mate only" look for opportunities to serve God and He can and will take care of the rest.
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Tamara224
Well-Known Member
And we were just giving some general answers.
I'm sorry, but I don't understand what you want. No one suggested that you go talk to a girl because she is interested in you. You should go talk to a girl if you are interested in her. Let's not pretend like the girl at the bowling ally didn't catch your eye. Obviously, you were looking at her often enough that you noticed her looking at you.
You seem to contradict yourself with each new sentence. You don't want to talk to women, but you want to meet more women, but you don't talk to them because they might not be Christian, but you wouldn't talk to them anyway because you don't want female friends, and anyway you never talk to anyone unless God specifically tells you to go talk to them, but where should you go to meet them, even though you're not going to talk to them.......
No one thinks you're desperate. Confused, maybe, but not desperate.
But if you're not unhappy with how things are, then you should stop complaining about it. And not ask for people's opinions on it if you have no intention of listening to or actually taking advice.
I'm sorry, but I don't understand what you want. No one suggested that you go talk to a girl because she is interested in you. You should go talk to a girl if you are interested in her. Let's not pretend like the girl at the bowling ally didn't catch your eye. Obviously, you were looking at her often enough that you noticed her looking at you.
You seem to contradict yourself with each new sentence. You don't want to talk to women, but you want to meet more women, but you don't talk to them because they might not be Christian, but you wouldn't talk to them anyway because you don't want female friends, and anyway you never talk to anyone unless God specifically tells you to go talk to them, but where should you go to meet them, even though you're not going to talk to them.......
No one thinks you're desperate. Confused, maybe, but not desperate.
But if you're not unhappy with how things are, then you should stop complaining about it. And not ask for people's opinions on it if you have no intention of listening to or actually taking advice.
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broken_one
Fear is but something to be overcome.
Took this from a book that came into my possession (sadly I don't have a title nor an author). Remember that Christian girls do things like any other girl.
-----
This is direct from the author: "Shopping Malls.
Try to remember the last time you went to a mall. Can you possibly look in a direction and not spot a beautiful girl that you would like to seduce? I'd venture a guess and say no. The malls are always full of girls. Girls who work at various stores and shops within the mall, but also a lot of girls who go shopping or just hang out. Girls love shopping. Though it is harder to seduce a girl if she is surrounded by her friends, it is not always the case.
Walk up and down the halls and look inside stores for beautiful clerks or shoppers. If it is a women's clothing store or something feminine, even better. You can easily walk up to a girl (clerk or shopper) and ask her: "Excuse me. Would you be so kind to hold this up in front of you for a moment? It's my sister's birthday next week and you are about the same size as her and from what I can tell you have the same excellent
fashion sense."
Better yet, after the initial approach you can even ask her if she sees anything else that she really likes in the store that your sister might like too because of the similar tastes in fashion. Probe for keywords why
she likes certain things over the others etc.
Once you have sufficient information of not only what she likes but also why she likes it you can start your charm. Expand the conversation to likes and dislikes in other areas of her life to get her view on things and so on. If she's a shopper you might want to act very quickly to finding ways for you to
continue your conversation somewhere else, but if she works there she won't mind spending the time with you especially if it's not very busy.
Libraries.
If there is one place that girls almost always outnumber guys, it has to be the library. Whether it's a public library or a college/university library, you will always find young girls trying to do research for a project or homework.
These girls are usually very intelligent and dedicated to their work, but the plain truth is the fact that everybody can use a break once in a while. If you provide a bit of a pleasant distraction they'll be more than happy to talk to you. You could be asking them for some help to locate a specific section or
specialty book. Even if they can't help you out they will at least have to tell you that they don't know where you can find your book. But guess what? That is a conversation taking place right there. Ask them about their own work, interests, etc. Show interest, and let them talk about it for a while.
These girls like to show off their knowledge so they'll tell you more than you need to know about the subject. But if you develop good rapport at this stage you can easily continue this fascinating conversation elsewhere. Get my drift? You can start asking why they're interested in this particular
subject, what's the most fascinating thing about it, what are the challenges and so on. Once you move to answering this type of questions then you will be able to get an insight as to what type of girl she is, what she holds dear and so on.
Gourmet Coffee Shops.
Before work, at lunch and after work these places are packed with girls.
Sometimes the more packed the place, the better because you may have to share a table with "someone". If it's not very busy you can still ask to sit next to a beautiful girl. Just tell her that you don't like to sit alone and if she'd mind you sitting with her till you're done with your drink. If you're sitting together might as well talk about something. And remember this is a gourmet coffee
shop. These girls don't come here for the coffee, they come here for the specialty coffee, and they come for the frills and sometimes even the prestige associated with a particular specialty coffee shop. So what do you talk about? Her favorite drink and why she likes it over regular coffee, how does it make her feel and so on. Try and talk in detail about the different sensations and aromas. Women love descriptive talk in detail especially
if it involves something that can even be compared to a sexual sensation.
The whipped cream, the cherry on top, how the blend of the coffee with the different liqueurs reminds you of a hot and steamy Latin love dance stimulating your taste buds beyond comparison etc. I guess while you are at the library you can pick up some books on gourmet foods and specialty drinks to learn the language fine critics use to describe them. Believe me, talking like that can make a girl melt even though you're only talking about a specialty coffee, because you end up planting all these wonderful images in her mind by using metaphors.
Workplace or School/College.
This is a more relaxed atmosphere for seducing women because you are
not under time constraints. If you can't get her hotter than hot for you today, you can talk to her again tomorrow. You'll have much better opportunities to get to know her. In addition, if you work or study
closely together for an extended period of time chances are that you will become attracted to each other anyway.
Restaurants with attached bars: These places are often great Tuesday to Thursday nights, around 6 -8:30 PM. Especially upscale places, they cater to a professional crowd. Some VERY nice looking women looking to unwind after work. Also often these places serve as a meeting ground for women having bacheleorette parties.
Coffee houses: like Starbucks, Coffee Bean, Tea Leaf etc. Great from 8 - 10:30 AM every day of the week. After 9 AM you are more likely to get women who work in retail, outside sales like pharmaceutical reps, self-employed, students etc.
Supermarkets: M - F noon to around 1:30 PM as women on their lunch hours pop into buy things. Monday to Thursday 6 - 8:30 PM, Saturdays 10 AM to noon, same for Sundays.
Shopping malls: This is a no brainer. If they have a good food court and are near offices, then noon til 1:30 PM, M - F. Hit the food courts and forget most of the rest of the stores. Other good times: Tues -Thurs 6:30 - 8 PM and Sat afternoons.
Self-improvement seminars: Such seminars are LOADED to the gunwales with good-looking, SUGGESTIBLE women who are totally open to the type of themes discussed in any good Seduction pattern. Same with most of the self-help gurus. Ya don't even have to sign up. Just find
out where they are being held, hang out in the lobby of the hotel and swoop in on the HB's during the coffee, pea and dinner breaks.
Gyms: The women are in awesome shape and usually quite adventurous.
Yoga Classes: Unbelievable amounts of hard-bodied, wildy well-shaped women. Take a beginners class if you've never done it before and you'll met lots of women, who are also VERY suggestible and open to "new ways" of thinking.
Sporting clubs and associations: "These areas are very good for meeting single women. You find out easily which women are single and you can talk with them easily because you have a similar interest. What could be easier? There is immediate conversation to talk about and its enough to get to know each other enough to work out: "Am I attracted to this person or not?"
Now the footy club [Australian football?] is maybe not the best place for hunting women but a netball club that has mixed competitions definitely is. Gymnasiums are good to. Women at gyms will talk to any guy that talks to them. Everything is on your side in these places because the woman knows you are in the same club and therefore will not automatically be rude to you. Also it gives them a harmless excuse to talk with you without people thinking any sleaziness is going on. They may be waiting for you
to say something.""
-----
I tried to clean this up a bit, but it originally came so disjointed and badly formatted that I've tried my best. Hope this does it for you.
-----
This is direct from the author: "Shopping Malls.
Try to remember the last time you went to a mall. Can you possibly look in a direction and not spot a beautiful girl that you would like to seduce? I'd venture a guess and say no. The malls are always full of girls. Girls who work at various stores and shops within the mall, but also a lot of girls who go shopping or just hang out. Girls love shopping. Though it is harder to seduce a girl if she is surrounded by her friends, it is not always the case.
Walk up and down the halls and look inside stores for beautiful clerks or shoppers. If it is a women's clothing store or something feminine, even better. You can easily walk up to a girl (clerk or shopper) and ask her: "Excuse me. Would you be so kind to hold this up in front of you for a moment? It's my sister's birthday next week and you are about the same size as her and from what I can tell you have the same excellent
fashion sense."
Better yet, after the initial approach you can even ask her if she sees anything else that she really likes in the store that your sister might like too because of the similar tastes in fashion. Probe for keywords why
she likes certain things over the others etc.
Once you have sufficient information of not only what she likes but also why she likes it you can start your charm. Expand the conversation to likes and dislikes in other areas of her life to get her view on things and so on. If she's a shopper you might want to act very quickly to finding ways for you to
continue your conversation somewhere else, but if she works there she won't mind spending the time with you especially if it's not very busy.
Libraries.
If there is one place that girls almost always outnumber guys, it has to be the library. Whether it's a public library or a college/university library, you will always find young girls trying to do research for a project or homework.
These girls are usually very intelligent and dedicated to their work, but the plain truth is the fact that everybody can use a break once in a while. If you provide a bit of a pleasant distraction they'll be more than happy to talk to you. You could be asking them for some help to locate a specific section or
specialty book. Even if they can't help you out they will at least have to tell you that they don't know where you can find your book. But guess what? That is a conversation taking place right there. Ask them about their own work, interests, etc. Show interest, and let them talk about it for a while.
These girls like to show off their knowledge so they'll tell you more than you need to know about the subject. But if you develop good rapport at this stage you can easily continue this fascinating conversation elsewhere. Get my drift? You can start asking why they're interested in this particular
subject, what's the most fascinating thing about it, what are the challenges and so on. Once you move to answering this type of questions then you will be able to get an insight as to what type of girl she is, what she holds dear and so on.
Gourmet Coffee Shops.
Before work, at lunch and after work these places are packed with girls.
Sometimes the more packed the place, the better because you may have to share a table with "someone". If it's not very busy you can still ask to sit next to a beautiful girl. Just tell her that you don't like to sit alone and if she'd mind you sitting with her till you're done with your drink. If you're sitting together might as well talk about something. And remember this is a gourmet coffee
shop. These girls don't come here for the coffee, they come here for the specialty coffee, and they come for the frills and sometimes even the prestige associated with a particular specialty coffee shop. So what do you talk about? Her favorite drink and why she likes it over regular coffee, how does it make her feel and so on. Try and talk in detail about the different sensations and aromas. Women love descriptive talk in detail especially
if it involves something that can even be compared to a sexual sensation.
The whipped cream, the cherry on top, how the blend of the coffee with the different liqueurs reminds you of a hot and steamy Latin love dance stimulating your taste buds beyond comparison etc. I guess while you are at the library you can pick up some books on gourmet foods and specialty drinks to learn the language fine critics use to describe them. Believe me, talking like that can make a girl melt even though you're only talking about a specialty coffee, because you end up planting all these wonderful images in her mind by using metaphors.
Workplace or School/College.
This is a more relaxed atmosphere for seducing women because you are
not under time constraints. If you can't get her hotter than hot for you today, you can talk to her again tomorrow. You'll have much better opportunities to get to know her. In addition, if you work or study
closely together for an extended period of time chances are that you will become attracted to each other anyway.
Restaurants with attached bars: These places are often great Tuesday to Thursday nights, around 6 -8:30 PM. Especially upscale places, they cater to a professional crowd. Some VERY nice looking women looking to unwind after work. Also often these places serve as a meeting ground for women having bacheleorette parties.
Coffee houses: like Starbucks, Coffee Bean, Tea Leaf etc. Great from 8 - 10:30 AM every day of the week. After 9 AM you are more likely to get women who work in retail, outside sales like pharmaceutical reps, self-employed, students etc.
Supermarkets: M - F noon to around 1:30 PM as women on their lunch hours pop into buy things. Monday to Thursday 6 - 8:30 PM, Saturdays 10 AM to noon, same for Sundays.
Shopping malls: This is a no brainer. If they have a good food court and are near offices, then noon til 1:30 PM, M - F. Hit the food courts and forget most of the rest of the stores. Other good times: Tues -Thurs 6:30 - 8 PM and Sat afternoons.
Self-improvement seminars: Such seminars are LOADED to the gunwales with good-looking, SUGGESTIBLE women who are totally open to the type of themes discussed in any good Seduction pattern. Same with most of the self-help gurus. Ya don't even have to sign up. Just find
out where they are being held, hang out in the lobby of the hotel and swoop in on the HB's during the coffee, pea and dinner breaks.
Gyms: The women are in awesome shape and usually quite adventurous.
Yoga Classes: Unbelievable amounts of hard-bodied, wildy well-shaped women. Take a beginners class if you've never done it before and you'll met lots of women, who are also VERY suggestible and open to "new ways" of thinking.
Sporting clubs and associations: "These areas are very good for meeting single women. You find out easily which women are single and you can talk with them easily because you have a similar interest. What could be easier? There is immediate conversation to talk about and its enough to get to know each other enough to work out: "Am I attracted to this person or not?"
Now the footy club [Australian football?] is maybe not the best place for hunting women but a netball club that has mixed competitions definitely is. Gymnasiums are good to. Women at gyms will talk to any guy that talks to them. Everything is on your side in these places because the woman knows you are in the same club and therefore will not automatically be rude to you. Also it gives them a harmless excuse to talk with you without people thinking any sleaziness is going on. They may be waiting for you
to say something.""
-----
I tried to clean this up a bit, but it originally came so disjointed and badly formatted that I've tried my best.
Hope this does it for you.
Last edited:
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Howard Cneal
Well-Known Member
Farmers' markets, Veggie Tales' movie releases, garage sales, death metal concerts mostly come to mind...
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E
Edwards1984
Guest
Actually, I've read that gyms or places where you can work-out in general tend to be places where women are very defensive, in that it's one of the places they're most likely to be hit on. From my own experience in gyms, most women are too busy or focused to get into discussions that would lead anywhere romantic.
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