My girlfriend and I have been dating officially for 10 months but have been "courting" for about two years. The reason for the 1 year or so difference is she wasn't prepared to make a jump into a relationship as she sees a relationship as a definite precursor to marriage (as it should be) and needed to make sure God was leading us together, which He definitely did. So ever since we started officially dating we have had the notion of getting married to each other.
We entered our relationship long distance, me being in Lubbock (West Texas) and her being in Houston. Since dating, we took things slow for a month or so and then started getting physical, we never went far (mainly just getting on top of each other or starting our "engines"). But even with that we felt guilty and we had to take a step back and reexamine the relationship. Around month six we stopped everything physical besides kissing and now in month 10 we have stopped kissing, but only by the Grace of God.
We talk about marriage, and our futures pretty openly with each other. She is a freshman (18) in college and I am a sophomore (19 almost 20). She goes to A&M and i go to Texas Tech. This next school year I will be transferring to A&M - after a lot of prayer - and that will be about the three year mark. Even though we are young God has made plainly evident that the path for us is definitely marriage. The only question is when?!
I want it to be soon, as in proposing probably the spring of my junior year which would be about a year and a half from now, dating officially for two and a half years by then. My reasons are because while we are very good about the physical relationship or lack of one currently, it is always an issue for me in my thoughts, or even when we get together we have to take "time-outs". She is leaning closer and closer to my thought on the time frame. But most adults say we should wait until after college which for us would be in four and a half years. With me waiting for her to finish school because I am a year older and because she is in a five year program.
We study the Bible together and pray together. We work every one of our problems out very well, with both of us very blessed with good confrontational skills and problem solving skills. We skype and talk to each other once a day (at least we try to) and studying the Bible is a daily thing, and we both have individual quiet times. Our spiritual, emotional, and intellectual relationships are highly matured, due to us being vulnerable and caring for each other. The only thing that hasn't matured - in the sense of activity - is the physical and it desperately wants to catch up. Maybe we have developed the other aspects too fast but I can't see the reason in trying to hinder something that is naturally progressing.
The question may arise that we should wait and see if we are compatible together when we experience a long time together due to this being a long-distance relationship. But we have been able to spend months together at a time due to summer breaks or week long periods together as well because of other school breaks. Plus skyping everyday has allowed for more contact than previously allowed say 5 years ago in a long distance relationship.
Regarding parents, her dad led me to Christ, and has been an active mentor in my faith. Her parents are very for a marriage between us and I have even discussed it with her parents, although not the timeline of it all. My parents are supportive of the relationship and although not Christians, offer amazing relationship/marriage advice (almost Biblical which is scary cool) and can really see where this relationship could be headed.
A verse that has been on my heart for longer than I can remember now is
We entered our relationship long distance, me being in Lubbock (West Texas) and her being in Houston. Since dating, we took things slow for a month or so and then started getting physical, we never went far (mainly just getting on top of each other or starting our "engines"). But even with that we felt guilty and we had to take a step back and reexamine the relationship. Around month six we stopped everything physical besides kissing and now in month 10 we have stopped kissing, but only by the Grace of God.
We talk about marriage, and our futures pretty openly with each other. She is a freshman (18) in college and I am a sophomore (19 almost 20). She goes to A&M and i go to Texas Tech. This next school year I will be transferring to A&M - after a lot of prayer - and that will be about the three year mark. Even though we are young God has made plainly evident that the path for us is definitely marriage. The only question is when?!
I want it to be soon, as in proposing probably the spring of my junior year which would be about a year and a half from now, dating officially for two and a half years by then. My reasons are because while we are very good about the physical relationship or lack of one currently, it is always an issue for me in my thoughts, or even when we get together we have to take "time-outs". She is leaning closer and closer to my thought on the time frame. But most adults say we should wait until after college which for us would be in four and a half years. With me waiting for her to finish school because I am a year older and because she is in a five year program.
We study the Bible together and pray together. We work every one of our problems out very well, with both of us very blessed with good confrontational skills and problem solving skills. We skype and talk to each other once a day (at least we try to) and studying the Bible is a daily thing, and we both have individual quiet times. Our spiritual, emotional, and intellectual relationships are highly matured, due to us being vulnerable and caring for each other. The only thing that hasn't matured - in the sense of activity - is the physical and it desperately wants to catch up. Maybe we have developed the other aspects too fast but I can't see the reason in trying to hinder something that is naturally progressing.
The question may arise that we should wait and see if we are compatible together when we experience a long time together due to this being a long-distance relationship. But we have been able to spend months together at a time due to summer breaks or week long periods together as well because of other school breaks. Plus skyping everyday has allowed for more contact than previously allowed say 5 years ago in a long distance relationship.
Regarding parents, her dad led me to Christ, and has been an active mentor in my faith. Her parents are very for a marriage between us and I have even discussed it with her parents, although not the timeline of it all. My parents are supportive of the relationship and although not Christians, offer amazing relationship/marriage advice (almost Biblical which is scary cool) and can really see where this relationship could be headed.
A verse that has been on my heart for longer than I can remember now is
But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.
1 Corinthians 7:9
And while we CAN control ourselves for the time being. Everyday of this relationship makes it harder and harder to control. And not that I am using marriage as a means to have sex. This verse speaks to one aspect of why getting married would be useful.
Im about too open a bank account for a engagement ring, and although I barely have any money, the money I will be making hopefully in the next year and a half will have a percentage going into the account for the ring.
I wouldn't be making any decision until I get to A&M in about 7 months. But just some input on what we should do would be so great.
Sorry if this is too long, I just have a lot on my mind. And when there is a lot on my mind I tend to write or type a lot to get my thoughts out there and allowing me to process better. Also I wanted to be specific so that I can get specific answers.
Im about too open a bank account for a engagement ring, and although I barely have any money, the money I will be making hopefully in the next year and a half will have a percentage going into the account for the ring.
I wouldn't be making any decision until I get to A&M in about 7 months. But just some input on what we should do would be so great.
Sorry if this is too long, I just have a lot on my mind. And when there is a lot on my mind I tend to write or type a lot to get my thoughts out there and allowing me to process better. Also I wanted to be specific so that I can get specific answers.
