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When does "lust" become a sin?
- Thread starter Ragnaros
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septemberskies
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ummidrinkcherrycoke
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MN John
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Ok, so here's the deal...
I'm sexually attracted to my SO, but don't act on it or fantsize about it or dwell on it. We intend to get married, but not too soon. Once or twice, I have actually lusted over her when thinking about her. Next week, I'm invited to a pool party. I would be seeing her in a swimsuit for the first time. I am concerned that this could feed my lust. I don't have a lust problem with any other women, I find it easy to look away from them.
In my circumstances, would you go to the party? (It's just her family, not a big group.)
I'm sexually attracted to my SO, but don't act on it or fantsize about it or dwell on it. We intend to get married, but not too soon. Once or twice, I have actually lusted over her when thinking about her. Next week, I'm invited to a pool party. I would be seeing her in a swimsuit for the first time. I am concerned that this could feed my lust. I don't have a lust problem with any other women, I find it easy to look away from them.
In my circumstances, would you go to the party? (It's just her family, not a big group.)
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septemberskies
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JAKG said:
If you think its going to be huge problem for you later then don't go. If you believe you can control your desires for her then just as the Lord to bless you with a great time and to be able to contain yourself.
ETA: I know for me, seeing my b/f with hardly anything on but swimming trunks would be an issue for me... its one of those images etched into the brain and you'll pull out for later references
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septemberskies
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JAKG said:
I hear you. Actions are not so bad but thoughts are just terrible. Its something that can go rampant when left unchecked. ...sometimes i'm not aware i'm lusting until i get convicted by the HS because at first its just a fleeing thought and then i dwell.
Can you see her ahead of time? If you think seeing her like that would lead to a stumbling block mentally then don't take the chance.
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MN John
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I am currently thinking that I will go because it is the only chance I will have to see her from before Christmas to New Year's. I will pray a lot beforehand and she'd never wear an immodest suit in any case (we are in our 40's). It will be in the middle of the day and I will be just getting finished with a shift of ministry at the homeless shelter, her brother-in-law will be among the family present and he is a pastor, and right after I will be going to have dinner with my small group leader's family. I'm hoping that all of these factors will help me to keep my mind in the right place. This will be Monday afternoon the 26th in case any of you want to help me out with additional prayer support.
John
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septemberskies
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You have my prayers John, have a wonderful day too when you go 
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septemberskies
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God bless, Evie
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Hmmm...I don't agree with everything that you said. I believe that finding someone attractive is ok, but when does it become a sin? That is not always easy to answer. However, I believe that one should not look at another person and want them in a lustful way....such as, thinking about their body, fantasizing about their body, about having sex with them, etc. If you go around looking at women's bodies parts...yes, that is lust. If you think of having sex with them, yes, this is lust. If you think of a woman and say "if my wife looked like that one day then I would want to have sex with her" then that is lust to.
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Punkdonkey
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septemberskies said:
Oh really? I thought it was an indication of how "PG" your post where :
I was thinking, what am I doing wrong...
he he
oups
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Great topic.
This translation makes it clear what Jesus really meant. Lustful INTENT - that is, PLANNING or ATTEMPTING to have out-of-wedlock sex. Another translation is "lusts AFTER". This translation also suggests a plan or attempt. Is sexual fantasy a plan or attempt? Clearly not. Therefore, sexual fantasy is okay provided you are fantasizing about married sex rather than casual sex, violent sex or other immoral sexual situations. In my view, if you fantasize about having sex within marriage with a devout Christian partner, you are doing no wrong.
I consider this to be one of the most misinterpreted verses in the entire Bible.
This translation makes it clear what Jesus really meant. Lustful INTENT - that is, PLANNING or ATTEMPTING to have out-of-wedlock sex. Another translation is "lusts AFTER". This translation also suggests a plan or attempt. Is sexual fantasy a plan or attempt? Clearly not. Therefore, sexual fantasy is okay provided you are fantasizing about married sex rather than casual sex, violent sex or other immoral sexual situations. In my view, if you fantasize about having sex within marriage with a devout Christian partner, you are doing no wrong.
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Take this scenario. You are unmarried and are planning to have sex with a married woman you know. You enter your car and start driving toward her house, but your car breaks down. Due to the breakdown, you do not end up having sex with this woman.
According to Jesus, you have committed adultery.
This was the type of thing Jesus was talking about, not sexual fantasy. Although in this case it would still be wrong to fantasize about having sex with this woman as the woman is married.
According to Jesus, you have committed adultery.
This was the type of thing Jesus was talking about, not sexual fantasy. Although in this case it would still be wrong to fantasize about having sex with this woman as the woman is married.
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