When do you let them play outside alone?

[Evening Mist]

At what age do you let them play outside alone? I'm curious to hear the various answers! I'm sure where you live makes a difference. We live on a quiet street in a decent neighborhood and we have a fenced yard, and a very loyal and protective springier spaniel.

My 7 yo is allowed to play in our fenced yard by himself, or ride his bike around the block with permission and checking in each time he circles. He's also allowed in the neighbor's yard if he is invited and lets me know. My 3 yo is allowed in the fenced back yard with his big brother and the dog. I glance out the window at them obessessively. I take the 3 yo outside too, but occassionally he will spend 5 minutes in the yard alone waiting for me. I take them both for walks. I think that this summer (he will turn 4) I will back off a little and offer him more time alone in the yard with the dog. Maybe.

Just curious about other families rules.

 

[Didymus]

i love being outside so i was always with my girls. but then my youngest daughter has special needs so i don t leave her alone much period. also we do not have a fenced yard. my older girl was going to the neighbor s at 4. they had a big yellow dog who gusrded the kids so i didn t worry. i would watch out the window though. i think it depends on how well you know your neigbors and know they will keep an eye out too. that was how this street was when mine was small. and we live on a main highway too.

 

[~PICKLE~]

Where I live it's hars to trust anything or anyone. my son is 4 and since he's not in school yet, he likes to play outside all the time. Sometimes I go sit on the porch and watch him. Other times we set up a mom thing, where 4 of us mom's take turns watching the kids. That way each has a chance to clean house do laundry, whatever. Oh by the way, I live in the getto and there Apartments. He is never outside alone, cause I don't trust nobody. And he knows where he can go and where he can't. And if he leaves the front area, he has to come straight in.

 

[E-beth]

I am a completely obsessive worrywart mom and i will probably let my son out by himself when he is old enough to drive.

Seriously, though, today kids get snatched up in their own front yard and in their bedrooms. It is so scary to have them out of site!

On our local news this fall was a story of a 20 month old girl who had been run over by her 9 year old brother who had been "driving" the riding mower while she was playing outside. Mom was not even home! I hugged my (then) 19 month old and just cried and then I thought, what was that woman thinking to let a child of 9 take care of a not even two year old OUTSIDE?

Watch in about ten years my son will be posting on here: Help My mom won't let me out of her sight!!!

 

[sioleabha]

I let my almost 2 year old play in the backyard with his 5 year old brother and 6 year old sister. We have a tall fence and I glance out the window whenever I go by. We also have a dog, but it's a tiny thing, part chihuahua. Still, I feel confident in their safety.

We used to live in an apartment where I would let the older kids play outside if they stayed where I could see them through our open door. If they left that area they had to come in. A lot of people would let their kids play in the parking lot by themselves, kids as young as two years old.

__________________
The promise of [Satan] in the Garden of Eden is at last fulfilled in the socialist state. Man is as a god, determining for himself what is good and evil -- measuring everything by his own invented standards, apart from God's revealed standards.
-- Harvey & Laurie Bluedorn, Teaching the Trivium

 

[~PICKLE~]

lol E-Beth

 

[kdet]

I agree with Ebeth..there are too many children being snatched right outside of their homes in broad daylight to let children younger than 10 play outside by themselves...IMO

 

[Tangnefedd]

It is a sad fact that our children do not have the freedom to play out that we enjoyed a kids. Whether stranger danger is any worse than it ever was, I don't know, but traffic hazzards certainly are. I think one has to give one's child as much freedom as possible, while keeping a watchful eye on them, not very easy to achieve, I know.

 

[psychoceramic]

If you mean alone alone with out any watching what so ever,,,...i would have to agree with e beth.. when my daughter drives she can be alone....but in real life we live in a bedroom community and i let her play outside by her self and with freinds.... but i have all the doors open to the outside and the windows opened and if i dont hear a peep for more than a minute i go looking for them...

even in this sleepy littel community i am watchful and fearful of others.... but the worst threats come from my daughters time with her mom. So please keep her in your prayers.

 

[mamaneenie]

My son is 2. I am living in a fairly safe community. Our backyard is quite secure. To get into our backyard you have to be in either the backyard on either side of the house, or the house up the back. It is pretty hard for an intruder to come in. I let him play outside all the time when I am cooking dinner. We have a small backyard, and I can see all of it when I am making dinner. (partly why we chose this house)

 

[Evening Mist]

If you mean alone alone with out any watching what so ever...

No, I mean outside while you are inside, checking on them frequently through windows or whatever. I don't mean 100% unsupervised. Not sure that should happen until they are well into their teens!

 

[seventh seal]

WOW! This is my first time posting here. After reading all these posts, i cant believe you all would leave your 2, 3,4 and 5 yr old children outside by themselves. No wonder there are so many kids being kidnapped. I live in an apartment complex where one of the mothers lets her 4 yr old run around everywhere. A kidnapper can have your kid quicker than you can get off the couch and look out a window. Just my opinion.

 

[mamaneenie]

WOW! This is my first time posting here. After reading all these posts, i cant believe you all would leave your 2, 3,4 and 5 yr old children outside by themselves. No wonder there are so many kids being kidnapped. I live in an apartment complex where one of the mothers lets her 4 yr old run around everywhere. A kidnapper can have your kid quicker than you can get off the couch and look out a window. Just my opinion.

Like someone else said, It really does depend on where you live. There is no way someone would get in my backyard without me knowing about it. (while my son is outside by himself) although technically I wouldn't say he was by himself, because I am hovering by the door or the kitchen window. Like I said, I can see the whole backyard from my kitchen window.

We are in a really safe part of Australia. I know my child is safe playing in our backyard. A. because I can see him, B. because God is watching over him.

 

[Evening Mist]

WOW! This is my first time posting here. After reading all these posts, i cant believe you all would leave your 2, 3,4 and 5 yr old children outside by themselves. No wonder there are so many kids being kidnapped. I live in an apartment complex where one of the mothers lets her 4 yr old run around everywhere. A kidnapper can have your kid quicker than you can get off the couch and look out a window. Just my opinion.

The suggestion that I am laying on my couch while my children run around unsupervised is rather offensive. I am cooking, tidying, in and out of the house with trash, gardening, listening to them through the window, checking each time the dog barks, etc... When we lived in an apartment complex, I always went outside with them. Part of the reason we moved to this house was the safety provided by a quiet street, kind neighbor's, and a good fenced yard.

And... stranger abduction is very low on the list of awful things likely to happen to children. Most children are abducted by relatives. We don't have any relatives who would want them!

 

[seventh seal]

Im sorry. I ma have been a bit overzealous. There have been so many kids abducted where I come from that it scares me to death. There are way too many perverts running loose out there. The young girl (unmarried w/ 2 kids by different fathers aho arent in their life) who lives below me just lets her 5 yr oldd run all over the place. He has been in the streets and almost ran over. Please forgive me Evening Mist. Im just very overprotective w/ my kids.

 

[sioleabha]

Im sorry. I ma have been a bit overzealous. There have been so many kids abducted where I come from that it scares me to death. There are way too many perverts running loose out there. The young girl (unmarried w/ 2 kids by different fathers aho arent in their life) who lives below me just lets her 5 yr oldd run all over the place. He has been in the streets and almost ran over. Please forgive me Evening Mist. Im just very overprotective w/ my kids.

I understand what you are saying, like I said, I used to live by a family that let their two year old play in the parking lot all alone everyday. They didn't even leave the windows open. You don't know how many times I nearly hit that kid in my car. But there is a happy medium between neglect and locking your kid in his room with 24/7 video serveillance and a high-tech alarm system.

You do have to be ever vigilant in an apartment complex. But the whole point of living in a good neighborhood with fenced backyards is so your kids can have a little freedom.

 

[HeatherJay]

We live out in the country and my 5 year old is allowed to play in the front yard (I keep a good eye on her through the window). My little one isn't allowed outside unless I can be outtside with her or at least leave the windows open. Our town is very small and a child has never been abdusted from this town, but I'm still very cautious. If Emily leaves the yard (i.e. if I can't see her from the window or the front door) she has to come inside immediately.

Before we moved back here to my home town, we lived in a pretty big city in an apartment. I never allowed my kids to play outside unless I was watching their every move. Luckily, I had wonderful neighbors with small kids, too, so we were able to plan lots of activities to keep the kids active (long walks, swimming, etc), but it's just too dangerous in some areas to let your kids run off on their own, even if they're with friends.

love, Heather

 

[Thankful75]

I am a completely obsessive worrywart mom and i will probably let my son out by himself when he is old enough to drive.

That is so me! We have a fenced back yard so mine are usually out there alone, but I am always peaking every now and then. Last spring Hannah age 5 started going across the street to play with the little girl who just moved in. Only because my Hubby told me to lighten up. I didnt like it but I let her go. And I still peaked out the window.

 

[MommyT]

It is very interesting to see so many different opinions on this. I too have wondered the same things. I have three children:5-3-1. I let my 5 year old go in the backyard and play, but my other two children are still at the wandering age- one glance away and they are gone! So I never leave them un supervised-EVER!My oldest pretty much just plays with his cars, etc in the dirt, so i feel that it is pretty safe. Last week though there was a story about some sicko going into a little girls room etc(this was only one town away from us)So they arent even safe inside your own house. That REALLY gets me. I try and let them have the freedoms that I think they should have, but it is VERY difficult, like all of you have stated,trying to find that medium.

 

[HeatherJay]

It is so hard these days. I remember when I was little (8 or so), my brother and I would come in the house to eat and sleep and that was pretty much it. We explored the woods around my house, sometimes a couple of miles away all day long, completely on our own. Obviously nothing ever happened to us, and my mom and Gram never had any reason to worry. But I ask myself sometimes if I would ever let my girls, when they're 8 or 9 do that (we live in the same town I grew up in). I don't think I would. I'd be a worried mess. It's really sad, and sometimes I feel like I'm being unfair to them because I can't give them the same freedom I had when I was little. But, it just seems like the world has changed so much...or maybe we're just more aware of the dangers now.

We live less than 2 miles away from the school my daughters will go to soon. When I was young, my mom would have thought nothing of me walking home on a nice afternoon (she might have worried about me getting out in the road or bad drivers or something, I guess). These days, it's impossible for me to NOT think of that poor little 11 year old girl, Carlie Bruscha (I'm not sure that's her name exactly)...walking home, her dad even on his way to meet her halfway...and some monster snatched her, raped her, and killed her. As a mother of two girls, it's terrifying. It's so hard to know where to draw the line...when are you being too over protective? I guess I find myself thinking I'd rather be too protective than not vigilent enough. And I know that I can't protect them from everything, even then.

Being a mother is SO hard sometimes. I have no idea how mothers who don't draw strength from God do it, honestly. At least I know I can lay my worries in His hands and feel comforted from that. Without that, I would be a nervous wreck, truly.

Love, Heather