Every where I go, everything I do, just reminds me that I am a widow. I go to church and see all the couples sitting together. I started a new Bible study today, and the leader went on and on about how to be a Godly wife. I just wanted to scream! Valentines is coming up and I dread the mention of it. I just want to stay inside and never go out again. When will this ever end? As you can tell this is one of those days when God seems so far away. Forgive my ranting. Maybe tomorrow will be better.
-
Starting today August 7th, 2024, in order to post in the Married Couples, Courting Couples, or Singles forums, you will not be allowed to post if you have your Marital status designated as private. Announcements will be made in the respective forums as well but please note that if yours is currently listed as Private, you will need to submit a ticket in the Support Area to have yours changed.
-
CF has always been a site that welcomes people from different backgrounds and beliefs to participate in discussion and even debate. That is the nature of its ministry. In view of recent events emotions are running very high. We need to remind people of some basic principles in debating on this site. We need to be civil when we express differences in opinion. No personal attacks. Avoid you, your statements. Don't characterize an entire political party with comparisons to Fascism or Communism or other extreme movements that committed atrocities. CF is not the place for broad brush or blanket statements about groups and political parties. Put the broad brushes and blankets away when you come to CF, better yet, put them in the incinerator. Debate had no place for them. We need to remember that people that commit acts of violence represent themselves or a small extreme faction.
When am I just me?
- Thread starter InHisCare
- Start date
- Status
D
dellinw
Guest
I am just me, and I do not like it. I lost my husband of 43 yrs June 13,2007. He was my "soulmate" I am sooo lost and lonely.
dellinw
dellinw
Upvote
0
I hate saying that I am a widow--I hate being a widow. Lately, I have started saying that I am single. It's taken me quite a while to reach that point because I have never felt single--in my heart I am still married.
I joined a bible study that has a mixture of marital status' and ages, as well as a mix of men and women. It is wonderful just being with a group who loves me and supports me. I recently was asked to go to a play and I thought I was going with a friend and her sister. Turned out it was with a group of people I had never met and of the 14 people, the teenage son of one couple and I were the only single people. I felt trapped because I did not drive there. We went out for dinner and it was devastating. Everyone had someone. Even the teenage boy had his parents to talk to. It was really mean of my "friend" to not tell me how it would be. I guess she knew I wouldn't have gone and she wanted to get me out of the house.
Well, I have started rambling and I have started feeling sorry for myself, so I'd better sign off.
I joined a bible study that has a mixture of marital status' and ages, as well as a mix of men and women. It is wonderful just being with a group who loves me and supports me. I recently was asked to go to a play and I thought I was going with a friend and her sister. Turned out it was with a group of people I had never met and of the 14 people, the teenage son of one couple and I were the only single people. I felt trapped because I did not drive there. We went out for dinner and it was devastating. Everyone had someone. Even the teenage boy had his parents to talk to. It was really mean of my "friend" to not tell me how it would be. I guess she knew I wouldn't have gone and she wanted to get me out of the house.
Well, I have started rambling and I have started feeling sorry for myself, so I'd better sign off.
Upvote
0
Alabale,
I appreciate your honesty in your reply, but it was quite cruel. I see that your marital status is married and I pray that you will not have to experience the pain of losing a spouse in death.
There are no rules when it comes to grieving a spouse and sensitivity from others is greatly appreciated and needed. I understand that people do not know what to say or do in this situation, but they are adults and they know what they are doing and how it will affect others. This person has known me for years, and yes, she is still my friend. We have worshiped together and have seen each other one-on-one several times since Terry died. I expected to be in the same situation when she invited me to the play. She was insensitive, however. She should have told me that there was a group going to the play and that they were all married couples. Does this mean I rip her out of my life? Does this mean she is no longer my friend. Having a misunderstanding means you work through it and continue on with the relationship. Your answer implies that my friendship with her is over and that is not the case.
Again, I appreciate what you said. But when you are grieving the last thing you need is to be scolded and told that what you are feeling is wrong. I hope that in the future, when in a situation with a person in deep grief, that you can be sensitive to that.
I appreciate your honesty in your reply, but it was quite cruel. I see that your marital status is married and I pray that you will not have to experience the pain of losing a spouse in death.
There are no rules when it comes to grieving a spouse and sensitivity from others is greatly appreciated and needed. I understand that people do not know what to say or do in this situation, but they are adults and they know what they are doing and how it will affect others. This person has known me for years, and yes, she is still my friend. We have worshiped together and have seen each other one-on-one several times since Terry died. I expected to be in the same situation when she invited me to the play. She was insensitive, however. She should have told me that there was a group going to the play and that they were all married couples. Does this mean I rip her out of my life? Does this mean she is no longer my friend. Having a misunderstanding means you work through it and continue on with the relationship. Your answer implies that my friendship with her is over and that is not the case.
Again, I appreciate what you said. But when you are grieving the last thing you need is to be scolded and told that what you are feeling is wrong. I hope that in the future, when in a situation with a person in deep grief, that you can be sensitive to that.
Upvote
0
memoriesbymichelle
Senior Veteran
My church has hardly any single people and the ones that are, are younger than I am. Alot of things focus on marriage and "couples". I go through different seasons. Most of the time I do not mind too much. It's not like their all married on purpose to spite me, but then I go through seasons where it bothers me, and once in awhile I say something so they are reminded that not everyone is married or has someone and they need to be sensitive to that. Tomorrow I am attending the women's ministry quarterly brunch. Guess what the topic being spoken is? "How to be a Godly wife" Isn't that special. I told the speaker "you know all of us aren't married" and her response was "oh well everyone can benefit anyway". She didn't mean to be insensitive, but to me...in this season....it was to me. Oh well
Upvote
0
- Status
Similar threads
