I am not sure what I have or if I have anything. I think the worst thing that I go through now in my life is sitting down and trying to focus on what I need to do. I get in these brain freeze modes when I can't think of anything better to do than to medicate myself with Nicotine or get into some sort of sexual "happening". I use to contemplate suicide as a teen and used to chew lead pellets to try and give myself lead poisoning. I used to inhale a lot of aerosol air fresheners, and I used to get drunk a lot. I still medicate myself with nicotine and still sniff the occasional glue bottle and stuff like that. A friend of mine, who is a drug counselor though I might have a form of Bi-polar disease because of my mood swings and buying habits, but I often dont think there is anything wrong with me but maybe there is. Any suggestions?