What's on your mind?

Wayholka said:

I'm at the point in my life where I am suffering from chronic compassion fatigued. I have helped so many people in life and very few of them had the common courtesy to return the favor. God made me a certain way that was completely unacceptable to the world so my relationship with others is parasitic at best. They have no problem accepting my gifts of time, money and possessions but can't seem to include me in anything. Just more requests for handouts.

I'm also thinking, "What's the point of any of this? Is this actually going to please God, or will it all be a waste since I desired a little praise for my efforts?" Bible Verses like Matthew 6:1-4 make me feel that all my efforts are a waste because I like having a little praise in a life where I'm constantly told since birth that I'm defective and need to be fixed otherwise they might as well throw me in the trash.

The more I read the Bible, the more I feel that the cards are stacked against me on the Judgement day. I'd rather just die and get the Heavenly humiliation over with.

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The verse in Matthew 6 isn't about receiving praise for your good deeds, it's talking about when people do "good deeds" that aren't really good deeds at all but are instead only doing things "for show". They never had compassion in their hearts, or any care for another - they just wanted to be seen like they do.

I understand what it feels like to feel like your works aren't seen or rewarded. I feel, myself personally, that I spent a lot of my life philosophically thinking about meanings to things, searching for truth and answers in life, in theology, etc. and my works have very little praise or respect. I've also experienced some great and amazing things from God himself, but again, these things aren't seen as desirable in many's eyes, Christians included. So all these things I've worked for, and striven for, and for what? To be walked on? To be dismissed as a regular Joe, as something common?(I think to myself as well).

But honestly, what's more beautiful then something that secret and hidden? What's more precious in God's eyes work-wise then work that's done that's hidden? Very little, if anything. Even I find those things to be the most beautiful of things... and I'm nothing to boast about, just a servant of the Most High.
Wayholka, one of the most highest callings in Christ is to do those secret good works imo. You're so far ahead imo I don't think you realize, you yourself aren't giving yourself enough credit.

Satan also wants you to make you feel like you are wasting your time. He hates those types of things, and he wants you to feel exactly how you're feeling about them because he himself believes it all to be in vain. Not saying it's all Satan, but remember that he does indeed do things like this.

We just gotta keep going. It's all we can do. I wholeheartedly believe you will see the fruit of your labor in this life, pieces of it of course not all, but you will see it.

Aslong as you find one person who appreciates you for who you are, that would be enough right? Because it would be for me. And I don't think that's asking God for much, to ask for that one person. He hears prayers like that imo. May not be his will, but it may.

Ever think of joining a church? I only ask because I did months back and have gained from going to church, not much yet, but a little. Right now it's still more work then it is reward, and I still don't feel I'm respected or cherished as much as I'd like to be, but I still go because it's what we're called to - fellowship. If you can't of course, then you can't... but I highly recommend it, to find a good church that believes in the right doctrines, and that has a stable healthy community of love, and to get all you can muster up to go.
I'll tell you something, every Sunday, and I mean every Sunday, I have the same routine. I almost not go each morning, each time with a different excuse (and they're valid excuses) but God gets me up every. time. to go. It's like I don't even have a choice in it. And when I do go, although it has it's struggles, the payout is greater.

Hope some of this will at least encourage you a bit.

mojoboy31 said:

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There is actually some truth to that. Think of Martin Luther, he would have been a universally celebrated, epic saint had he lost his life in the process of the Reformation, and thus had never had the chance to live old enough to write all the horrible super villain -stuff he did in his old days.

Jack of Spades said:

There is actually some truth to that. Think of Martin Luther, he would have been a universally celebrated, epic saint had he lost his life in the process of the Reformation, and thus had never had the chance to live old enough to write all the horrible super villain -stuff he did in his old days.

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That's one way of putting it, lol.

Yawn.......


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Hawthorne said:

As rough as that sounds, mate, it sounds like you're doing Christianity right.

Are you doing your good deeds to get recognition? I've never gotten that impression, but I'm just an internet person. If you're doing stuff so people will think you're a good guy... that's what the passage is talking about.

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Kind of. Since learning about eternal reward, I made earning reward a priority while any praise was a bonus. When I gave, I do it hoping that God will reward it later in the afterlife. Getting a little recognition in the process is certainly an encouragement to me but it's not always necessary.

Hawthorne said:

Remember the story of the father who poses the scenario to his son: If you came home with a skin of water on a hot day and your mother and I were both thirsty, to whom would you give the water? The boy replies he would give it to his father which was the wrong answer; giving it to his mother was also the wrong answer. Finally he asks who should get the water, and his father replies that the boy should drink it so that he can have the strength to fetch water for his parents.

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Huh. Sounds like the Bible gives me permission to take a vacation from serving. At this point, I will certainly take advantage of this because I really am burnt out from all of this.

Hawthorne said:

Take care of yourself, friend. You clearly have been graced with talents and abilities, but it seems like you're overdoing it. Step back and recover so you can return to productive service for our King.

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Will do. The whole concept of a hierarchy in Heaven just scares me. I'm a loser now and I'm afraid I'll be a loser for the rest of eternity if I don't apply myself.

Thank you for your encouraging words.

SarahsKnight said:

I think that desiring just A LITTLE bit of praise for your caring ways is understandable, and totally normal. That doesn't automatically equal underhanded or selfish intentions, at least not in my eyes. Of course, God knows your heart here better than anyone, but I for one would doubt that He sees only pride or selfishness there. Caring can be extremely taxing, especially when you see no encouragement or light praise from others for it, giving you the strength to keep on sacrificing in whatever way that you do for the good of others, confident that it is not all in vain.

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I hope so. This earthly life already had most of the cards stacked against me and it's slowly killing me that even God's cards are stacked against me. It's like my life has to be a long, continuous struggle to reach a standard I can never reach without suffering to the point where death becomes attractive while everyone else around me just prospers easily.[/QUOTE]

SarahsKnight said:

Life is precious, Wayholka, including your own. Do not be so quick to wish it over. If you believe in Christ, then there is ultimately no need to fear humiliation in the wake of God's judgment unto destruction. He is merciful. And I am sure He would rather you keep on keeping on with your life here in the present.

I do hope I have understood your grievances which you have expressed here well enough that you find my words of help. If you have not, if I have missed the point you may have been trying to make, then I apologize.

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You understood perfectly. Thank you for your encouragement.

CodyFaith said:

The verse in Matthew 6 isn't about receiving praise for your good deeds, it's talking about when people do "good deeds" that aren't really good deeds at all but are instead only doing things "for show". They never had compassion in their hearts, or any care for another - they just wanted to be seen like they do.

I understand what it feels like to feel like your works aren't seen or rewarded. I feel, myself personally, that I spent a lot of my life philosophically thinking about meanings to things, searching for truth and answers in life, in theology, etc. and my works have very little praise or respect. I've also experienced some great and amazing things from God himself, but again, these things aren't seen as desirable in many's eyes, Christians included. So all these things I've worked for, and striven for, and for what? To be walked on? To be dismissed as a regular Joe, as something common?(I think to myself as well).

But honestly, what's more beautiful then something that secret and hidden? What's more precious in God's eyes work-wise then work that's done that's hidden? Very little, if anything. Even I find those things to be the most beautiful of things... and I'm nothing to boast about, just a servant of the Most High.

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I've done thinking of my own during these past several weeks. What if my works were done out of vanity? What if my suffering was all my fault and wasn't as bad as I remembered it? What if I'm not applying myself hard enough and that what I'm doing was indeed a waste of my talents?

It didn't help when people kept pushing me to succeed in spite of all my disadvantages. The mental illness, the over-medicating, the broken home, the bullying, the isolation... It was either reach an acceptable standard that so many take for granted or die alone and miserable.

It was like my life ended before it even began. If God tells me I've failed then I would be crushed.

CodyFaith said:

Wayholka, one of the most highest callings in Christ is to do those secret good works imo. You're so far ahead imo I don't think you realize, you yourself aren't giving yourself enough credit.

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Aw shucks.

CodyFaith said:

Satan also wants you to make you feel like you are wasting your time. He hates those types of things, and he wants you to feel exactly how you're feeling about them because he himself believes it all to be in vain. Not saying it's all Satan, but remember that he does indeed do things like this.

We just gotta keep going. It's all we can do. I wholeheartedly believe you will see the fruit of your labor in this life, pieces of it of course not all, but you will see it.

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You're right. As soon as I get my health back up and I'm back at work, I'll see if I can be productive again. For the time being, I'm just going to take it easy.

CodyFaith said:

Aslong as you find one person who appreciates you for who you are, that would be enough right? Because it would be for me. And I don't think that's asking God for much, to ask for that one person. He hears prayers like that imo. May not be his will, but it may.

Ever think of joining a church? I only ask because I did months back and have gained from going to church, not much yet, but a little. Right now it's still more work then it is reward, and I still don't feel I'm respected or cherished as much as I'd like to be, but I still go because it's what we're called to - fellowship. If you can't of course, then you can't... but I highly recommend it, to find a good church that believes in the right doctrines, and that has a stable healthy community of love, and to get all you can muster up to go.
I'll tell you something, every Sunday, and I mean every Sunday, I have the same routine. I almost not go each morning, each time with a different excuse (and they're valid excuses) but God gets me up every. time. to go. It's like I don't even have a choice in it. And when I do go, although it has it's struggles, the payout is greater.

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The only thing I've ever wanted in life was to be loved and appreciated, and for people to see value in me. This eludes in real life because of the way I was made. Defective. I feel nothing but anger and bitterness towards God in this respect. I know He does not like one of his pottery criticizing for how it was made but it does not help when it is made a chamber pot that gets treated like crap by all the other pottery. He should not have been surprised by this.

CodyFaith said:

Hope some of this will at least encourage you a bit.

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It has. Thank you.

Lol at everyone getting butthurt about Amy Schumer getting body shamed over her being cast as Barbie in a live upcoming live action film.

She's a hypocrite when it comes to body shaming. She's fine with shaming short men, but when it comes to overweight women that suddenly crosses a line. Also, unless this film is some ironic comedy, she's a horrible choice for Barbie.

When most people think of Barbie, they picture a thin women in her 20s. Not an overweight one pushing 40. Lol. Like I said before, if the comedy is supposed to be ironic, I think she's a good choice, but if its not we're just getting another hypocritical sjw film.

Swan7 said:

I used to do some RPing on another site. Sadly I didn't keep up with Naruto. But I'd certainly love to RP again! perhaps we can do that at some point, maybe after Christmas

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that sounds lovely, I'm sure we could come up with something fun together

SarahsKnight said:

Wait. You are a game creator, Senkaku?

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haha, umm, guess the cat's out of the bag now. I have been designing a card game, I'm actually working on it right now. I can't give all the details away just yet (embargo) but when the time is right I will discuss it more.

I just don't understand social justice warriors. Equality means equality to the bitter end. Sadistic equality needs to be achieved too. You body shame men, we have to make sure women are as equally body shamed too.

That's just how my mind works. I tend to take things literally. I'm not one who's really for double standards.

MehGuy said:

I just don't understand social justice warriors. Equality means equality to the bitter end. Sadistic equality needs to be achieved too. You body shame men, we have to make sure women are as equally body shamed too.

That's just how my mind works. I tend to take things literally. I'm not one who's really for double standards.

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It's only because they haven't got anything better to do. They don't care anywhere near as much as they make out.

ReesePiece23 said:

It's only because they haven't got anything better to do. They don't care anywhere near as much as they make out.

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I doubt that. Body image is extremely important to people.

Especially considering all the heavy girls who make fools of themselves by posting bikini photos of themselves on sites like Buzzfeed.

False hope is all it really is. Men are never going to accept this, especially when they're getting hypocritical body positive messages shoved down their throat. SJWs somehow make an impossible task even more impossible.

What's funny is that women's description on why they like tall and muscular men can also be done in the reverse to explain why men like thin and youthful looking women. Like the attractions compliment each other.

Women are attracted to the big, and the men the dainty.

Women like tall men to feel protected. Men like thin women to feel more like protectors. Women like muscles to feel protected, men like youthful women to feel like better protectors.

Yet SJWs expect men to inact the labor of going against their biology, yet women are not expected to do the same. Double standards. They shove feminism in your throat saying it's the definition of equality. Well if you're a feminist you're going to have to be open to being as cold to physically unappealing women as we are to physically unappealing men.

In short, it's feminist to body shame women. I've been body shamed all my life, and as a good feminist I need to do the same to them.

After further reading, yes this is a hypocritical feminist/sjw movie.

Oh no..

You're really just giving young girls false hope. Sure you can be hypocritical. I want tall men, but any body type I have is fine. Yet the hot ones still won't date you.

Psst.. tumblr/buzzfeed feminists.. reality isn't a social justice warrior.

Although given how much women hide their fat bodies on dating sites, most of them know better deep down, lol.

I mean they still want double standards. They want it acceptable to say "I only want tall men" on their profiles while throwing a hypocritical fit when men state they only want thin women on theirs. Even banning a few men who dared to go for equality.

1st cold I have had in over 4-5 years

Just ate raw chilli to clear up my throat and sinuses

Tongue feels like it is on fire now

I hate equality. That sounds bad. No, really, equal rights are good, but I'm not a fan of "equalizing" things, if that makes any sense. I mean, what's the point of having rights if we have the right to take rights away from others? Most social issues and hot topics sound a lot like this to me.

Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them!!!!!!!

OcifferPls said:

I hate equality. That sounds bad. No, really, equal rights are good, but I'm not a fan of "equalizing" things, if that makes any sense. I mean, what's the point of having rights if we have the right to take rights away from others? Most social issues and hot topics sound a lot like this to me.

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By any chance, are you referring the the terrorist feminist movement?

OcifferPls said:

I hate equality. That sounds bad. No, really, equal rights are good, but I'm not a fan of "equalizing" things, if that makes any sense. I mean, what's the point of having rights if we have the right to take rights away from others? Most social issues and hot topics sound a lot like this to me.

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I see what you mean. Economically things don't have to be equal. I don't think we have to force to adjust for things like bad genetics, but everyone should have an equal shot at success according to their natural abilities.

My idea of equality is more rough, one that probably more realistically assures checks and balances.

Not one that feeds emotionally masochistic feminist egos.

EyesOfKohl said:

By any chance, are you referring the the terrorist feminist movement?

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Terrorists in general I think would possibly be a more fair way of putting it lol. That the domains overlap a bit, seems plausible.

Edit: I guess, really, it's dominant parties that I have the biggest issue with. I have problems with people behaving as if they have special rights to limit others' rights, and I have issues with both men and women in American society. That could include "terrorists" but not really where I am. Maybe some feminists. There are women who seem to confuse those "special rights" for equal rights, and behave like chauvinists in the process, but it's not really a feminist thing I'm against.

hot chocolate

MehGuy said:

I see what you mean. Economically things don't have to be equal. I don't think we have to force to adjust for things like bad genetics, but everyone should have an equal shot at success according to their natural abilities.

My idea of equality is more rough, one that probably more realistically assures checks and balances.

Not one that feeds emotionally masochistic feminist egos.

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Economic disadvantages are another bag of problems altogether. I'm not sure that there is a perfect solution. I wish it were more fair but it seems like we're headed on a crash course no matter what route we take.