maybenotcrazy, thankyou for that story. I think most, if not all, people do know that God exists. With an open mind, everyone is capable of realising this truth, because the knowledge of it is within us already. As Paul also said,
"For since the creation of the world His invisible attributes are clearly seen, being understood by the things that are made, even His eternal power and Godhead, so that they are without excuse, because, although they knew God, they did not glorify Him as God, nor were thankful, but became futile in their thoughts, and their foolish hearts were darkened" - Romans 1:20-21.
This knowledge is readily available to all.
I have accepted that God exists for all my life. You mentioned that before you met God, you would wake in the night with a "horrendous feeling of meaninglessness". I have only had one day in my life where I woke up in the morning, and felt something close to that. It was a brief moment, and it passed. It was absurd, and made no sense to me why I even had that feeling at that moment. For me, I can intellectually see that despair would flow from atheism, but understanding what that is like is far from my ability to comprehend. So thankyou again for your story.
Eudaimonist, thanks for your thoughts. You were quick to say that my conclusion is negated by your personal experience, but you should note two things:
1. That particular conclusion was the logical outcome - in many cases it is not the actual outcome, because atheists like yourselves don't think deeply about the consequences of your beliefs
2. I anticipated your response, and even wrote on it. Instead of negating my views, you have merely rejected them
And so, you say,
I'm an atheist. I reject both conclusions. They don't actually flow from atheism.
If you reject both conclusions, then you are saying you believe the following first two propositions, and that they are compatible with the third one:
1. Life is meaningful
2. Objective moral values and duties exist
3. God does not exist
I invite you to explain how propositions 1 and 2 are, or can be, true on atheism, and not incompatible with 3.
To help you see why this is a problem, I will use a common formulation of the argument from morality:
4. If God does not exist, objective moral values and duties do not exist
6. Therefore, God exists (from premises 2 and 4)
Clearly, if this argument works, you hold an inconsistent set of beliefs. 2,3, 4 & 6 are contradictory. But 4 seems like a *very* plausible premise, and indeed many atheists accept it is true. Without an unchanging, eternal being in which to ground morality, there can be no objective moral values and duties. You must show how 4 is mistaken, if you want to continue to hold premises 2-3.
Regarding meaning, this is obviously false. If God does not exist, and we are not immortal, then life cannot have meaning. One day, believes the atheist, the universe will be a sea of black holes that will consume all matter, and following that it will be a soup of elementary materials that do not bond together. A lifeless soup, empty of anything bigger than an atom, if I recall correctly. Or the universe will collapse, and nothing of this life will be remembered or have any affect on what is to follow (if anything). What are humans? An accidental byproduct of evolution, a mere speck on the story of history. As a speck we came, a speck will we pass. Will the universe care that we composed a beautiful symphony? Will it remember that we were kind to our neighbour? Will the black holes that consume us praise our genious in understanding how they work? No. All will pass away into nothing, forgotten forever, with no eternal meaning. Ultimately, it will not matter if you were kind or cruel to your neighbour, if you wrote songs that pleased ears or cause people to block them, or if you had any children or not. How could this not be more obvious? One day, all of us humans will cease to exist, must the atheist believe. It is most clear that life is meaningless for the athiest. And if you think life is meaningful, then you hold another contradictory belief:
7. If God does not exist, life has no meaning
8. Therefore, God exists (from premises 1 and 7)
Any meaning you can devise will be transitory. If you say that you give life its own meaning, then you're not talking about the same thing as me. I'm not referring to an internal illusion you devise for your own comfort. I'm talking about whether life has *actual* meaning. Your personal meaning and mine may differ, and we can't both be right - but we can both be wrong. A personal meaning to life will not do. It might give you some false comfort - but when we reflect on the ultimate bleak nature of reality, it will quickly be seen as a joke.
Then don't become an atheist. It doesn't sound like you can handle it.
Another possibility is that I am right, and recognise things about your beliefs that you either refuse to, or cannot. Then it's not a question of whether someone can handle atheism, but whether atheism is true.