What will it look like?

[Million Pieces]

What will it look like when I find someone who really loves me? How will I know? Will it be like back when I was 17? Will it make me blush and act like a giggling teenager? lol

What will his name be? Where will I meet him? What does he look like? Will he look more like Peter, or Gerry?

I have my ideas what I want to look for, what I want it to be like, but I'm so afraid that it's not realistic at my age. By the time a guy is around this age, he's either single for a GOOD reason, or he's someone's leftovers. Of course I'M going to be someone's leftovers too, so I guess I can't be too demanding can I.

What will it feel like to be loved deeply, passionately, wholeheartedly and madly? Or am I assuming more than I'm entitled to, that I'll ever BE loved that way.

Look at me... moping around about being loved again, and I'm not even single yet.

 

[captiveheart]

I watched a movie last night called Fighting Giants I think it was. A man was giving another man advice about what to do. He told a story of two farmers who were praying for rain. One of the farmers prayed and waited and the other prayed and went out to prepare his fields for rain. He asked his friend, which farmer do you think received rain?

I think you have to prepare yourself for who God would bring you. I dated around for a long time before I heard a sermon about becoming the right person for someone else. Instead of focusing on looking at every single female I met as a candidate for wife, I started focusing on me and making myself the best candidate for husband. I left the connecting part to God. I continued to date Christian women. I learned a lot about myself and waited for something that really felt special. I dated one woman for nearly two years. She was an amazing woman. She was beautiful, fun, talented, smart and a great friend. She used to tell me she loved me and I used to pray that I would fall in love with her. I used to wonder if something wasn't wrong with me. Why couldn't I fall in love with her. I often thought that maybe I wasn't going to feel that way again. I thought about asking her to marry me because we just got along so well. Then, I met Linda. She was a lot like my friend except for one thing, I fell in love with her almost right away. God opened a maze of doors that brought her and I together. I had no doubt.

A kind of funny side note. I had full custody of my kids and when many of the women I met/dated found out that they were with me all of the time, their whole demeanor changed. The corners of their smiles dropped noticeably.

 

[RobinRedbreast]

By the time a guy is around this age, he's either single for a GOOD reason, or he's someone's leftovers.

Someone's leftovers? You speak of other divorced people as being different or worse off than you would be as a divorcee? Am I someone's bloody leftovers? Did my current husband "settle" for someone else's cast-offs?

Think more positively than that. It will be the death of you. Stop your moping and love yourself first before anyone else can.

I'm sorry but that one line really miffed me.

 

[Million Pieces]

So sorry to have insecurities. And nowhere in my post did I ever allude to MorningGlory or her situation, past present or future. It's not always about you, get over it.

Actually what I meant by that is the divorced guys who ARE the slugs of the earth, much like my best friend's (two) exes, and my own father. I'm fairly convinced that they're not ALL like that. Take our friend captive heart up there.

 

[EbonNelumbo]

MP

You know I love you, right?

You are NOT someone's leftovers, don't EVEN get me started on HIM....

I can tell you this, though I realize it's different...

When I broke up with my ex-fiance, Nick, albeit he was abusive, I never thought I would love again, I never thought that if I found someone I would know it and so on and so forth. But I did, I found Mark, he looked NOTHING like Nick, he actually surprised me because I had never really cared for redheads before, but you've seen him, he's Irish through and through...my point is, I let go, and I let God, and then I was blessed with the love of my life, far more than the guys I had invested my heart into before.

Keep strong, babe. You're worth every tear I shed, every prayer I send. Never forget that. Love you.

 

[Million Pieces]

Thanks so much Hallee, I just love you guys to pieces.

It's been interesting some of the attention I've been getting on Facebook, and in other social situations. Maybe it's always been there and I'm just noticing it more now, or maybe I'm inviting it to myself now, or maybe I'm just assuming things that I'm not entitled to. But I've been getting little compliments, little flirts (and some downright straightforward ones that have surprised the heck outta me), that I never expected. I'm havingn to remind myself very firmly NOT to let them flatter me.

 

[GryffinSong]

I fell in love again in my early 40s. Yes, it was giggly and fun and absolutely fabulous! As captiveheart said, I worked on myself. I focused on doing things I loved, on growing as a person, and on being happy with myself and my life.

As someone in here told me recently, age is just a number, and my experience tells me that life just gets better and better over time.

Hugs and good luck! You WILL get through this!!!

 

[dayknee]

What will it look like when I find someone who really loves me? How will I know? Will it be like back when I was 17? Will it make me blush and act like a giggling teenager? lol

What will his name be? Where will I meet him? What does he look like? Will he look more like Peter, or Gerry?

I have my ideas what I want to look for, what I want it to be like, but I'm so afraid that it's not realistic at my age. By the time a guy is around this age, he's either single for a GOOD reason, or he's someone's leftovers. Of course I'M going to be someone's leftovers too, so I guess I can't be too demanding can I.

What will it feel like to be loved deeply, passionately, wholeheartedly and madly? Or am I assuming more than I'm entitled to, that I'll ever BE loved that way.

Look at me... moping around about being loved again, and I'm not even single yet.

Aww...I know exactly how you feel. I wonder the same exact thing daily..
Ive been seperated for two years..today is our 19th wedding anniversary..

I have asked all the same questions you are asking..the being loved..madly/passionately/ just..irrevokably.
I dont know when you will find it but I bet when you do..you WILL feel like 17 all over again..I have faith and hope in the future and in God..
He will bring someone to you that is all those things you need and desire.
He truly knows your heart.
I see your hurt in your words becuase I know how you feel. I actually see me writing the exact same things.
God bless you so much. I am sorry you are hurting.

 

[Autumnleaf]

I suppose it will feel like it did when you met your other lover(s). Or maybe it will feel like you are settling for someone who is okay but not ideal according to your standards. It depends on what your standards are and how the other person treats you.

 

[EbonNelumbo]

Well you're loved to a million little pieces. It doesn't matter what your true man is going to look like, so long as he actually has some manhood this time. Love you.

 

[Million Pieces]

LOL Odd, you know who I want, and I suppose you know that it's not HIM, but someone LIKE him. Is that too much to ask for? That's a pretty high standard to meet, but if one man can do it, who says there can't be another?

 

[EbonNelumbo]

God has control of all the standards, made the man who you want, and has already made one better for you too. I love you Glynn, I want the best for you, and I am praying you find it.