What to do when you are down?

[Mrs. Enigma]

Every time I start going down, I try to pick myself back up again, or hang on until I make it through the down time. But what things can I do to cope?

What I mean is, if I feel down and overwhelmed by emotions like loneliness etc, then I first of all go and try to chat with someone online or see if I have any emails to respond to etc, because stuff like that helps me feel stronger..like needed and wanted and special etc.

But, if noone is on to chat with me, and noone wrote me any messages, I feel like having a coupld drinks. Now, there is nothing wrong with having a couple drinks, but it really bothers me that I feel like I need them sometimes.

Sometimes I try watching a comedy or something to, to try to get my mind of things, but I really can't seem to figure out a good consistent, dependable way to get through the down times.

I was thinking that maybe if I found a good chat room it would help..like if none of my friends are online I could have a chat room there for backup, you know. But I can not seem to find any good chat rooms either.

Ah, well.

 

[mebby02]

Aww l'm here l feel depressed sometimes too l'm sorry to hear that. Go for a walk if your down or making join like some kind of fitness class. Or do a sport do something so you can enjoy yourself usually takes your mind off stress and depresstion.

 

[CFFosterAngel51]

Every time I start going down, I try to pick myself back up again, or hang on until I make it through the down time. But what things can I do to cope?

What I mean is, if I feel down and overwhelmed by emotions like loneliness etc, then I first of all go and try to chat with someone online or see if I have any emails to respond to etc, because stuff like that helps me feel stronger..like needed and wanted and special etc.

But, if noone is on to chat with me, and noone wrote me any messages, I feel like having a coupld drinks. Now, there is nothing wrong with having a couple drinks, but it really bothers me that I feel like I need them sometimes.

Sometimes I try watching a comedy or something to, to try to get my mind of things, but I really can't seem to figure out a good consistent, dependable way to get through the down times.

I was thinking that maybe if I found a good chat room it would help..like if none of my friends are online I could have a chat room there for backup, you know. But I can not seem to find any good chat rooms either.

Ah, well.

I'm sorry you struggle with depression too. I do as well from time to time. I like to watch a good comedy when feeling down as well!

I would agree with mebby's recommendation as well... the walking would get you out of the house. Staying in the house all the time tends to breed depression if done for an extended time.

Sometimes when I'm down I will write cards to my friends because that takes my thoughts off of how bad I'm feeling. Then I pray for them.

The problem with drinking when depressed, is that alcohol is a depressant. It helps us to relax, but it also has the tendency to continue to depress, especially if not used in moderation.

Take good care of you. Remember you are never alone.

In Him,
Kristen

 

[Mrs. Enigma]

I'm sorry you struggle with depression too. I do as well from time to time. I like to watch a good comedy when feeling down as well!

I would agree with mebby's recommendation as well... the walking would get you out of the house. Staying in the house all the time tends to breed depression if done for an extended time.

Sometimes when I'm down I will write cards to my friends because that takes my thoughts off of how bad I'm feeling. Then I pray for them.

The problem with drinking when depressed, is that alcohol is a depressant. It helps us to relax, but it also has the tendency to continue to depress, especially if not used in moderation.

Take good care of you. Remember you are never alone.

In Him,
Kristen

Sometimes I write letters to friends when I am down too.

I think you are both right about me needing to get out of the house more. I know that because I am so shy, I tend to not do that enough....

 

[Jeshu]

What really helped me was the bible especially the first letter of John and of course Paul is great as well - it helps to keep things in perspective.
God loves us and we are often going through extreme testing grounds. We need to learn to rely on God and not our own wits. Hard lessons but carrying the seeds for a harvest that has eternal ramifications.

Or at least that is how I experienced and survived 11 years of clinical depression.

 

[Mrs. Enigma]

What really helped me was the bible especially the first letter of John and of course Paul is great as well - it helps to keep things in perspective.
God loves us and we are often going through extreme testing grounds. We need to learn to rely on God and not our own wits. Hard lessons but carrying the seeds for a harvest that has eternal ramifications.

Or at least that is how I experienced and survived 11 years of clinical depression.

Because I got out of a cult last year, when I read the Bible I tend to only see condemnation or rules that are not even there...like it triggers teachings from the cult where they twisted scriptures etc. I wish that I could just have some nice loving scriptures to read when I am down.

 

[CyberPaladin]

Mrs.E your not going to find easy anwser since you have a very complicated situation. I do believe that if you find the right church it could be very helpful. I will pm some more detail thoughts I have later.

 

[Mrs. Luther073082]

Exercise will give you a nearly immediate pick me up.

Volunteering is also good, particularly if it is where you can interact with animals or other people.

Getting in touch with your artistic side can sometimes help relieve stress/give you something to do, too.

 

[AWorkInProgress]

Heya,

I been working on this problem. I tackle it from 2 fronts really. First I realized that online friendships are not the cure for loneliness. Can be a small part of it but it will never saticify the relationship needs completely.

I come here to lean on couple of people I know, but I try not to let my social life consist of only that. Think of the other benefits of being with a friend in person, talk over coffee, go to movies together, talk about stupid stuff, work together on projects, go out to eat, or whatever. More interaction and that person is there.

Just what I do,

I sow seeds of love by serving others. Like I helped my mom's neighbor move some furniture out with her son. Peter and I had 30 min conversation afterward exchanging philosophies on music. Talk to some of the guitarists at the arts ministry and they share their wisdom with me. Not as much I like, but still rewards I reap from seeds I sow.

Other is to learn to not be attached or addicted to need of attention. This was a tough one for me, many ways I did it unconsciously. Even had a dysfunction based on it. Basicly instead of building myself up, I relied more on what others think about me. Later I ran into the Acceptance dysfunction too.

Now I am learning how to be wise and following what directions God put within me. I busy myself with the things I love to do and learn about. I donate time to church or help my folks. Learning to enjoy cooking more and better organize my appartment.

Other times I lean on God and Word of God. Lastly I listen to music that relates to my mood. Like "Shine" from Sevendust or "This is your life" by Switchfoot.

My latest understanding is that I been a fool most of my life. I crave many things, but going to take time for them to happen. I have to pay the depts of my foolishness first. Just how it is. If I remain diligent and wise, I can experience more and meet more people. Doing the things I want to do.

Learn contentment, and how to sow seeds of love. Dial out the garbage that keeps you chained to the floor and chart a new coarse in better waters.

 

[everlast]

Hi Mrs. Enigma, I hear you loud and clear on this one, sometimes its difficult to get out of the hole, I always find myself falling back in, altho some things Ive found to help relieve the dreaded state of D is to watch a movie, and if you find yourself online alot maybe you can find one of those puzzle games, math games and such those can really get your mind off things, maybe reading a book too, altho i havent done that in a long time,

others have suggested walking outside the only irony to that is that my depression keeps me from even wanted to get up lol and ontop of that my anxieties aswell but thats a whole other matter, infact this may sound wierd but the other day I was cooking something and when it was done I felt this sense of gratification, im not a cooking person and ive just begun and it sometimes makes me feel good. Just try to avoid any negative energy from like unpositive tv shows or even certain films or maybe even ppl. Hope you will feel better soon. God Bless.

 

[Jeshu]

I recommend the psalms - David struggled many a time himself - this makes it wonderful reading.
Please arm yourself with God's Word as it is your best tool against depression. Read it often by yourself and treat it as God speaking to you - loving magic.

 

[GrannieAnnie]

I agree with all of the above....I was diagnosed 10 yrs ago and have learned that trying to find your "artistic" side can be fun. It may be in the form of cooking or gardening or learning a new craft. I got a big sketch book and would draw things by making "dots" rather than lines, it takes HOURS, but it's very distracting. Or I'll write the name of a favourite pet or person in the smallest writing I can all over the page, and do it in different colours..anything that takes time, doesn't need much "brain work" but is still very time consuming....it takes your mind off your depression. I'm not saying it always works....but when I've been in my "black hole" sometimes I've stayed up 24 hrs a day just doing stuff like that. I also recommend Psalm 91....very encouraging....even write it out !! I confess when I'm REALLY BAD...I chain smoke...I'm not normally into cigarettes, but when I have to....I have to, and it's better than alcohol. Just don't hurt yourself....or anyone else...because the "black hole" will pass, so whatever you do....DO SOMETHING.

God bless and good luck.
Annie xxx

 

[rushingwind62]

Every time I start going down, I try to pick myself back up again, or hang on until I make it through the down time. But what things can I do to cope?

What I mean is, if I feel down and overwhelmed by emotions like loneliness etc, then I first of all go and try to chat with someone online or see if I have any emails to respond to etc, because stuff like that helps me feel stronger..like needed and wanted and special etc.

But, if noone is on to chat with me, and noone wrote me any messages, I feel like having a coupld drinks. Now, there is nothing wrong with having a couple drinks, but it really bothers me that I feel like I need them sometimes.

Sometimes I try watching a comedy or something to, to try to get my mind of things, but I really can't seem to figure out a good consistent, dependable way to get through the down times.

I was thinking that maybe if I found a good chat room it would help..like if none of my friends are online I could have a chat room there for backup, you know. But I can not seem to find any good chat rooms either.

Ah, well.

For me I often felt like the walls were closing in on me. So I would get out of the house and go for a walk in the park. It seems like sunshine helped me. Don't isolate yourself within your four walls, that will only add to your depression. It is not always easy to push yourself to get out, but once you do it will help. At least it helped me....God Bless You!!

 

[April Angel]

Hi

Try to avoid negative people or situations. There are certain people (e.g. Landlord) who always trigger my depression so I try to get my husband to deal with them. They don't have the same effect on him because he does not suffer with depression.

Last time I was very down, I managed to pick myself up after having a chat with some people on CF. Their sympathy really helped me.

I hope that everyone in this thread will feel happier soon.

God bless you all.

 

[brel]

A couple things.. when I'm depressed, it's physically painful. I can feel it in my hands and arms and legs and so on. I just relax into it and get very still. And it helps, a lot. The default state of being is peace and joy and love. And even the feeling of depression can be a way back to it.

Another thing is music. I can't thank God enough for music! Music is life and a little bit of heaven.

 

[Taylor43]

I come onto cf knowing it is safe, even i lurk. I find it helpful here to know i am not alone in the struggles i deal with. I also listen to music oldies/classical,and Christian Hyms

 

[Mrs. Enigma]

thanks for all your advice people! I read through all of it.
I have been trying to find some sort of hobbies, and I am hoping to try to make friends in real life, because I realize their support would be good, but I am very shy and insecure.

Also, about avoiding negative people etc..I do try to avoid deep heavy movies etc, and the prob. with people, is that the people who make you happy can also make you sad.

Please, keep me in your prayers.

 

[AWorkInProgress]

You are not alone that is for sure. We will be here if need to talk it out.

In recent discussions with my good friend here. I discovered new yet old problem. Seems my battle with loneliness never ended. I only conquored deep loneliness.

I have more researching to do on the subject. What I picked up so far is that certain what seems like normal behavior is really all associated with loneliness. What seems to be the cause is that emotions were turned inward.

I learned from my break up with my exgirlfriend that emotions, specially strong ones, can not be suppressed. If done so, they build up and at some point explode. What I never really thought about was normal day to day emotions? If I can not express my daily emotions or be myself openly, then my needs are never met. Creating that void of loneliness.

I dropped off a file on another floor, and as I was walked back. I did the usual, "Hello!" to people I walked by. I noticed that there was an invisible barrier. I never go beyond "hello" because I think they can not relate to my problems. I judged them and chose not to open up or let some of my emotions out. Also I ran into someone where I felt the barrier wasn't fully up, but still in the way of me expressing myself.

I am going research this more, and in trials of letting down my social guard. To say what I want to say and to do what I want to do. Instead of maintaining massive amounts of control over myself.

 

[cardfan1]

You are not alone that is for sure. We will be here if need to talk it out.

In recent discussions with my good friend here. I discovered new yet old problem. Seems my battle with loneliness never ended. I only conquored deep loneliness.

I have more researching to do on the subject. What I picked up so far is that certain what seems like normal behavior is really all associated with loneliness. What seems to be the cause is that emotions were turned inward.

I learned from my break up with my exgirlfriend that emotions, specially strong ones, can not be suppressed. If done so, they build up and at some point explode. What I never really thought about was normal day to day emotions? If I can not express my daily emotions or be myself openly, then my needs are never met. Creating that void of loneliness.

I dropped off a file on another floor, and as I was walked back. I did the usual, "Hello!" to people I walked by. I noticed that there was an invisible barrier. I never go beyond "hello" because I think they can not relate to my problems. I judged them and chose not to open up or let some of my emotions out. Also I ran into someone where I felt the barrier wasn't fully up, but still in the way of me expressing myself.

I am going research this more, and in trials of letting down my social guard. To say what I want to say and to do what I want to do. Instead of maintaining massive amounts of control over myself.

great insight. i think to an extent we all do this. i know that i look at myself internally one way, and outwardly I behave differently. sometimes it's almost as if i don't want to bother others with my own problems, ideas, experiences, etc. Thus I don't always fully connect or share with other people. I have also found that those I enjoy being around the most are the ones that I have let down my guard with and have just been myself.

to get back on the main topic of this post though. I've found that things can very easily become overwhelming. even just the simplist tasks seem monumental. so when occupying your time, try to take it in small doses. I enjoy getting into deep, spiritual, philisophical conversations, but since ive had this depression, even that can be too much. so i try to keep things simple and light as much as possible until it becomes necessary to tackle the harder obstacles.

just find something simple or easy and try to find enjoyment in that. for me, just going for a walk at the park or getting out in the woods helps a lot. i think most would agree that staying at home in your room is not the best thing to do.

anyway, hope all are doing well this week. have a great weekend. God bless.

In Christ...

 

[jsimms615]

I've been down since last Monday. I got so overwhelmed by everything it was hard to work by Wednesday morning. But, I just knew I had to try, so I just kept going through my day, in a fog. I told a couple of friends I was having some problems with depression this week and that helped a little. I still feel really tired and have to work Saturday.