What Satire are You Reading?

[Tom D]

This thread is for sharing your favourite satires....or stories.
Feel free to post any story you've enjoyed.

It doesn't have to be your own work----it can be written by others, or told by others, as in my case.
(Provided that there is no copyright violation)

 

[Apple Sky]

The Pharisees are winning

The thought occured to me with all the moral outrage and Culture wars over peoples behaviour and even what they believe and think as being wrong. How its all focused on virtual signalling, being asociated with the right side of history. Identity politics which divides people into groups that...

www.christianforums.com

How to Get Rch without Knowing Anything
An unmotivated school-leaver with no skills and barely the ability to read ----- somehow beat 150 brilliant candidates to win a prestigious job. What happened?

At the age of 21, Jack Williams finally graduated. But he wasn't graduating from university—he was barely graduating from high school.

Jack wasn't stupid, but with his parents obsessed with making money, there was no time left for him. As a result, Jack's schoolwork was left for dead. He could barely read. At home, he spent all his time playing video games.

Jack has zero interest in his appearance or clothing. He rarely combed his hair and always wore very, very shabby clothes. While he was at school, he was often ridiculed by other classmates.

After leaving school, Jack tried to look for a job but couldn't get one. He was jobless for a long time. He applied for many positions but got nowhere, it's little wonder -- he rarely arrived on time due to sleeping in.

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One day , on the street, Jack met the head teacher from his school - Julie Leading.
"Hello Jack, how are you getting along?"
"Hey, Miss Leading...so nice to see you again.... I am trying to find a job, but...."

After hearing Jack's difficulties, she advised Jack to consult a fortune teller. She jotted down the fortune teller's contact details and passed them to him.
Later that day, once Jack got home, he called the fortune teller.


"Who is it?"
"I need a fortune teller to advice me how to get rich...without knowing anything."

"How to get rich without knowing anything??? ....Oh, yes, your name, please?" the fortune teller inquired.
"Jack," he responded.
"Ah...What time tomorrow would suit you?
The fortune teller arranged the appointment time and ended the call saying, "Be punctual, Jack."
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However, the following morning, Jack overslept. When he woke up, it was already past the appointment time. Deciding to continue his sleep, Jack resolved to visit the fortune teller the next day instead.

When Jack finally arrived at the fortune teller’s office, she greeted him with a stern look. "I was waiting for you the whole day yesterday....You should have called to reschedule," she scolded, her eyes narrowing. "You caused me to lose a few clients."

With a sigh, the fortune teller beckoned Jack to sit. "What brings you here today? You're the guy...who wants to get rich without knowing anything, right?? You came to the right place." she asked, her tone softening slightly.
"I love clients who don't know anything...", the fortune teller murmured to herself.
After a generous dose of sweet, vague talk which meant nothing, the fortune teller advised him to buy crystals.
Jack bought some crystals from her, hoping they would bring him good fortune.
As Jack left , he felt a renewed sense of determination and hope. The fortune teller's words and the crystals he now carried drove him to feel confident about his future.

_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

One day, he saw a job ad in the paper, it was published by iClub.

iClub was the top youth fashion house in the country. They were looking for an intern who was a recent high school graduate. What appealed to him was that no qualification or experience was required whatsoever. He launched an application and was told there would be a test for all applicants in 2 weeks' time.

After 2 weeks, Jack went to the iClub headquarters for the test. There were around 150 candidates present. The person who sit next to Jack was named Alessandro, who won a youth fashion design competition some time ago. He was very talented in art and design, and highly confident at this moment.

The examiner, a serious looking woman with glasses, told the candidates that they were given 2 hours. The total score was 1000. The exam proved to be too hard for Jack, he didn't think he performed too well, and doubted if he could score more than 600. After 2 hours, the examiner asked all the candidates to stop, and she started collecting papers from them. There was a folder prepared for each candidate, in which the papers were kept. After all the candidates left, the examiner put all the folders onto her own desk and planned to review them in the next few days.

On that same night, a thief broke into the iClub headquarters. He was a commercial thief, sent by a rival company UStyle. HIs mission was to steal some important design blueprints. By mistake, he went into the examiner's office, mistaking it as the design chief's. He searched all over the place but didn't find what he was looking for. As he was getting impatient, his hands hit the pile of exam folders and some of them dropped onto the floor. Some of the exam papers slipped out of their folders. He quickly picked them all up and put them back on the desk. After a while, he went out of the room. Finally, he found the design chief's office. After a while, he put something into his bag and then left.

The next day, when the examiner returned to her office, she didn't perceive any difference there. She began to review the exam papers and compare the works of candidates. She gave a score for each candidate as she went through his or her work. Finally, she picked the one with the top score.

Four weeks passed after the test. One day, while he was playing video games after getting out of bed at 2 PM, Jack received a call from iClub, and was told he got the job!! To his astonishment, Jack could hardly believe it.

How Jack really got rich.

One day Jack swapped a cow for some beans & the rest is history, his-story.

 

[peaceful-forest]

I will share what I shared earlier with you (I guess it counts as satire).


I heard this one when I was growing up:

A teacher had a gardening project for his students. He gave his students the seeds to plant and grow flowers.

The time came to grade everyone's project. All the students had beautiful flowers, except one student. This one student had nothing.

The student told the teacher, "I tried everything and did exactly as you instructed, but nothing happened."

The teacher gave this student an A+. But all the other students were angry.

The teacher defended himself, "This student did exactly what I told him to do. Besides, I know you all cheated because I cooked the seeds and made them useless."

 

[Tom D]

In a beautiful Austrian town, Master Hans was the most respected carpenter in the region. His work was known not for extravagance, but for its quiet perfection—doors that never creaked, joints that never loosened, and homes that stood for generations. Two young men began their apprenticeship under him.
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The first apprentice, Wilhelm, was undeniably brilliant. He could think quickly and had a mind like a blueprint—able to visualize complex designs instantly, calculate angles without measuring, and identify wood types by scent alone. Master Hans praised him often, calling him “a rare talent.” Wilhelm basked in the compliments. He loved being admired and gravitated toward glamorous projects—ornate furniture, decorative carvings, anything that drew attention and applause. He avoided the small, quiet tasks like sanding beams, fixing warped doors, or troubleshooting creaky joints. “Leave those to Johann,” he’d say. “I was born for bigger things.”

Johann, the second apprentice, was slower. He asked many questions, made mistakes, and often stayed late to redo his work. He didn’t have Wilhelm’s natural flair, but he had something else: perseverance and humility. He measured carefully, sanded patiently, and learned from every error. Over time, Johann became the one Master Hans relied on for all the small jobs—tightening loose hinges, adjusting uneven frames, repairing misaligned drawers. He never complained. He treated each task, no matter how minor, as a chance to learn.
________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

One day, a client came to Master Hans with a troubling problem: the sliding doors in his cafe had begun to stick and groan, disturbing the peaceful atmosphere. “I’ve oiled the tracks, replaced the rollers, even shaved the edges,” the client said, “but nothing works.”

Master Hans turned to his apprentices. “Go together. Find the cause. Fix it.”

Wilhelm and Johann visited the cafe. Wilhelm examined the doors, slid them once, frowned, and declared, “It’s a warped frame. Nothing we can do without rebuilding the whole wall.” He left, muttering about wasted time and better uses of his talent.

Johann stayed. He sat on the floor, opened and closed the doors dozens of times, listening. He noticed the sound changed with the weather. He examined the floorboards, the humidity in the wood, the angle of the track. After hours of quiet observation and trial, he discovered the problem: a subtle shift in the foundation had tilted the track just enough to cause friction. He adjusted the base, reinforced the frame, and added a hidden wedge to restore balance.

The next day, the client returned to Master Hans, beaming. “The doors are silent again. It’s like they float.”

Master Hans nodded. “Who solved it?”

“Johann,” the client said. “He’s remarkable—he stayed until it was perfect.”

Wilhelm overheard. He said nothing, but his face tightened.

Later, Master Hans rebuked Wilhelm. “You think you are smart but smartness is nothing without discipline. The world doesn’t need more brilliance, it needs more discipline !”

Wilhelm was furious. That evening, he packed his tools and left the workshop. “I’ll build my own legacy !!” he shouted.

He opened his own carpentry shop in the town square. His reputation as a prodigy drew crowds. Clients lined up for his dazzling designs—spiral staircases, carved mantels, intricate latticework. Business boomed.

But Wilhelm had no one to check his work. Without Master Hans’s quiet oversight, flaws crept in. Joints loosened. Beams warped. Doors stuck. Clients returned with complaints after complaints. Wilhelm blamed the wood, the weather, the mosquitoes—but never himself.

Within a year, the crowds thinned. His shop grew quiet. The town whispered: “Beautiful, but broken.”

Meanwhile, Johann continued his quiet work. He built homes that stood firm, gates that never groaned, and furniture that aged gracefully. He never sought praise—but earned respect.

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