What is your "Love Language"?

[Redguard]

I recently had this book introduced to me in my church's Men's Group meeting.

The premise is that we all have a preferred "Love Language". In most cases, this is the way that our spouses can best show their love for us in a way that we can appreciate.

Vote on an option and then proceed to explain why you answered the way you did.

 

[Lordbay]

For me, I just love to spend as much time as I can, but we both work odd shifts and don't get much time together. When we have a whole day together, we love to stay with in arms reach of each other the whole day. I live for those days.

 

[Redguard]

I think that my 'love language' is Words of Affirmation.

I would love to spend the rest of my days listening to the wife telling me how great I am and how much she loves and appreciates me.

It's kinda like having my ego stroked. And ego stroking is always good in my books.

 

[Southern Cross]

Word of affirmation is mine, too. If I don't receive encouraging messages or words of affirmation from my wife - pretty much the only person I need to hear them from - I feel like I'm alone and doing everything for no discernable reason except to just allow my family to survive. Even though we're separated, I'd still value any affirming statements she made.

I think even if words of affirmation are something your spouse does not focus on, they still need to hear it from you. When was the last time you said soemthing encouraging to your wife or husband? Even if it was just to tell them you were proud of them? Don't make them do something stupendously wonderful before you'll say something. Say something first and then maybe they'll have the desire to do something stupendously wonderful.

 

[selune]

I needed to choose 2! Oh well, physical touch and words of affirmation. But only from my husband. I dislike being touched by people other than family, not a friend hugger type of person. Sometimes I feel like the little things are taken for granted.

 

[Mirelys]

Quality time and physical contact. I could spend days just talking together and cuddling.

 

[LiberatedChick]

I'm a quality time and acts of sevice person. I voted for quality time as I'd say that is more important to me.

 

[IceCrystalH2O]

I am definitely quality time!! Followed VERY closely by physical touch. I have read that book and it sure did help me to see my husband differently. What I thought was just him being overly picky and trying to "turn me into his mother" was actually him just wanting to be loved in his language...which is acts of service.

 

[jd032700]

I picked Acts of Service, but receiving gifts is also important to me. I read the book and my husband and I are VERY different in this area. His is quality time.

 

[fruitrach]

Time and touch.

I really liked this book although I felt it put too much emphasis on working out what your partner's one language is. I think there's scope for far more...

For example...

my languages are time and touch but Dan's is words of affirmation so as well as learning to communicate in each other's language, we're learning to receive in each other's language too because it figures that people find it easiest to communicate in the language they prefer to receive in.

I also think there's benefit in looking at all of them and finding ways to increase your communication in all of them - everyone likes a little bit of each language surely?

 

[2Bhumble]

Mine's quality time...

 

[HeatherJay]

Mine is Physical Touch (followed by Receiving Gifts). I'm a very, very, very kissy, huggy, touchy type person. I feel really loved when he hugs me first when he comes home from work (as opposed to me initiating the hug) and that kind of thing.

My hubby is Acts of Service (followed distantly by Quality Time). He feels loved when I do things for him like wash the dishes, or fold his laundry, or cook him his favorite supper. I really dislike doing those things but I try my best because I know how much it means to him.

 

[Redguard]

Interesting that nobody has chosen "receiving gifts" as their love language.

 

[HeatherJay]

Is my hubby the only Acts of Service man out there??

 

[Redguard]

Is my hubby the only Acts of Service man out there??

Yes.

 

[HeatherJay]

Interesting that nobody has chosen "receiving gifts" as their love language.

It's my close second language. Maybe people feel materialistic or something if that's their primary language.

 

[ladylike]

I voted for physical touch, such as hugs but then again I like being told, affirmation as well as quaility time! That's a tough one.

 

[Cherub8]

Quality time.

 

[isaiah5213]

I needed to choose 2! Oh well, physical touch and words of affirmation. But only from my husband. I dislike being touched by people other than family, not a friend hugger type of person. Sometimes I feel like the little things are taken for granted.

i have read the book... quality time outranks words of affirmation for me by about 1 or 2 only.. lol!!

my husband is clearly clearly physical touch. and when we did our tests, we both laughed at me, cuz' i only got one point on the physical touch scale out of a possible 25... we were rolling.

he did tell me: "this is where i know how much you love me, cuz' i never would have known that it was that low for you... it's amazing how much you work to please me... "

wasn't that sweet of him?? i thought it was!

 

[suzybeezy]

Mine is Words of Affirmation. I need to hear that I am appreciated and my efforts are noticed. I'm very verbal and my husband is not. So when he does use words to express his feelings, they are so much more valued than diamonds or gold.