What is the most embarrassing thing that has ever happened to you in a church service

[Colabomb]

If I remember correctly, that's a part of an Anglican tradition...

Actually, I think Roman Catholics do it too. I remember something about it in a Jack Chick tract... and he for some reason never mentions Anglicanism....

Lol, except this one time...

I remember something about how this early Protestant "wouldn't have his Baby Baptized by a Priest of Rome" or something like that... But a Priest of England would do just fine

 

[Father Rick]

Ok guys... I had to dig this thread up 'cause I have a new 'most embarrassing'...

Sunday, I was filling in at St. Stephen's Episcopal. I was taking the Book of the Gospels (with the nice gold plated cover-- you know the one with the 4 Evangelists on it) from the altar seen to bring out to the congregation to read. As I turned around, the Gospels slid out of my hands and flew across the altar area seen here,

taking 2 big chunks out of the wood floor and slightly denting the gold plated cover. The sound of the 'crash' just rang through the sanctuary.

Nothing says 'I'm the new guy' quite like throwing the Gospels across the room!

 

[RobNJ]

Well, you certainly made an impression!!!!
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on the floor, on the book cover....

 

[chalice_thunder]

Heavens!! Fr. Rick, can you imagine what people would have said if you'd picked up and launched the Missile?

 

[benedictine]

Ok guys... I had to dig this thread up 'cause I have a new 'most embarrassing'...

Sunday, I was filling in at St. Stephen's Episcopal. I was taking the Book of the Gospels (with the nice gold plated cover-- you know the one with the 4 Evangelists on it) from the altar seen to bring out to the congregation to read. As I turned around, the Gospels slid out of my hands and flew across the altar area seen here,

taking 2 big chunks out of the wood floor and slightly denting the gold plated cover. The sound of the 'crash' just rang through the sanctuary.

Nothing says 'I'm the new guy' quite like throwing the Gospels across the room!

Umm... This past Sunday, I carried the Gospel Book in Procession, like normally, and then stood it on the Altar, again, like normally, and then.................................................................................................
It fell over. Nothing nearly as bad as what happened to Fr. Rick!

 

[AveMaria]

Oh, no, Father Rick! Forgive me, but I'm giggling hysterically!

 

[Father Rick]

Oh, no, Father Rick! Forgive me, but I'm giggling hysterically!

Giggle away...

I wouldn't have put it out here for you guys if I didn't think you would find it funny.

 

[Mic]

OK, I don't feel NEARLY as bad about breaking the Host into the Blood anymore.

At least I didn't throw anything!

Mic

 

[Timothy]

Well I finally have one. We had "Onward, Christian Soldiers" on Sunday as the leaving hymn. I was on the organ, swell out to full. And I hit the first two chords of the introduction, only then realising that I'm in the wrong key. It sounded dreadful. I had to stop and start again.

Oh, and Benedictine, why've you got your display thingy set to be Roman Catholic?

Timothy

 

[Finella]

Wow, this is a great thread -- nothing like a little leaven....

I have been somewhat lucky in my long life of acolyting and musicing in the church that I have never set fire to anything, never coughed up a ball of phlegm in the middle of a chant (thanks, Uber, I was laughing so hard when reading your story--it's one of my worst fears!) nor have I spilled or farted or anything... yet.

My friends and family, well....

Once my mom was in the role of Chalice Bearer. The carpet of the dias around the altar and the area around it was this bright red, and the lighting was somewhat dim. My mom took the chalice from the priest and turned to step down from the dias toward the altar rail where people were already settling into kneeling position. She realized as she stepped that she couldn't clearly distinguish between the edge of the step and the shadows in the carpet, and before she knew it she missed the step and fell forward, launching the wine out of the chalice, all over the red carpet and splashing a few people at the altar rail. Oy. I think she managed to stay standing and just turned around and asked for more wine from the priest who hadn't even had a chance to leave the altar yet, and then, with a few red spots on her cotta, turned carefully back to the altar rail and managed to get through communion with some kind of dignity. Ever after as lay chalice bearer she would feel forward with her foot as if she were blind just in case.

At that same church I was an acolyte while a friend of mine was thurifer for the first time. I had shown her how to raise and lower the lid of the thurible and she was nervous about following all the detailed instructions for when to emerge from the sacristy, how many times to cense people, etc. We were just about to process out for the Gospel, and she came out, bowed to the altar, and crossed to the priest who was going to put incense into the censer and bless it. She raised the lid to the thurible and suddenly one of the chains came loose, dumping several glowing coals onto the same red carpet and sending sparks flying. The priest began stomping out the coals, alb and stole flapping, until it seemed the fire danger had passed. He gently waved off my mortified friend to the sacristy where she spent the remainder of the service trying to reattach the chain to the thurible... I think the thing wound up being out of commission the rest of the service.

 

[chalice_thunder]

Well I finally have one. We had "Onward, Christian Soldiers" on Sunday as the leaving hymn. I was on the organ, swell out to full. And I hit the first two chords of the introduction, only then realising that I'm in the wrong key. It sounded dreadful. I had to stop and start again.

Oh, and Benedictine, why've you got your display thingy set to be Roman Catholic?

Timothy

Hey Timothy.

I would venture to say ALL of us organists have been there.
(Uber can probably back me up on this!)

Next time, do what I do...play those same chords again and make a magnificent fanfarish extended introduction...you'll eventually get your wits back, and manage to slip back into the right key!

 

[Diane_Windsor]

Rarely am I embarrassed so I don't have a story of my own. But it was fun reading through the stories and laughing at your expense

Diane

 

[karen freeinchristman]

One Christmas morning at the communion service, where it was so early that there were only about 20 of us there, and it was nice and peaceful, my mobile phone started ringing during the prayers. This might be a usual occurence in some with some church goers, but I never even use my mobile phone, and I don't even keep it switched on. It was only a junk-mail message from the service provider. Would have been good if it was God on the line!

 

[marciebaby]

When I was little and walking up the stairs towards the altar, I mis-stepped and fell backwards off the stairs and landed upside down in a large potted plant with my dress up over my head.

 

[Historicus]

I have a few...

Like at my Baptism, which was held in a stream (usally held in the Ohio River, but in this case in a stream), I was going down the steep incline, to the water, which my Father and the Pastor were already there... and upon entering the water, tripped. I didn't go all the way down, but not fun at all. Then being nervous from that anyway, when I was told to hold my nose, I didn't hear the command, and was lowed backwards, rather quickly into the water. All I remember was the Pastor saying "__ As a profession of your faith in the Lord Jesus Christ, and a sign of the remission of sin, I baptize you in the Name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost. Amen. I said Amen. and *splash* I had forgot to hold my breath (or even close my mouth all the way (oops!...). I was now drinking muddy creek water. I started coughing, and upon walking (with help) back up to dry land, everyone was asking me if I was okay. Embarassing! lol.

Another time was when I was asked to play Silent Night with another friend on the trumpet (and Clarinet... bad combination!). We put on our robes, which matched the ones everyone in the choir would be wearing (they were hand made for the occassion, out of thin material, and were purple (why I don't know). My friend and I walked up the center asile, to the front of the church, and I got my feet caught in the material. It riped, I trip... caught myself on the railing up to the choir area, right in plain view of the entire congregation. I managed to get through it, but never agreed to do anything like that again.