What is an "unselfish" life?

[Rembrandtfan]

What do you think this looks like?

 

[127.0.0.1]

Well if you had kids and then gave them away to infertile couples I'd say that's pretty self-less.

Maybe every time someones says your name you give 'em a dollar.

We're all selfish at some point or other. That's just how it is. Unless your a saint than at some point, you've probably slapped someone's hand and said, "Hey! le-go my Eggo tm!"

So outside of the lives of the saints, it all just kinda varies.

 

[Rebekka]

Well if you had kids and then gave them away to infertile couples I'd say that's pretty self-less.

Maybe every time someones says your name you give 'em a dollar.

We're all selfish at some point or other. That's just how it is. Unless your a saint than at some point, you've probably slapped someone's hand and said, "Hey! le-go my Eggo tm!"

So outside of the lives of the saints, it all just kinda varies.

I agree.

I'm sick and tired of the selfish bingo. Pfff. As if other people aren't selfish. We all are. Maybe my not having children makes me more selfish than a parent in a way, but on the other hand, maybe my lack of materialism makes me less selfish than the same parent.

Funnily enough, it's always other people who are selfish, never yourself.

 

[fuzzymel]

Everyone is selfish to a certain extent so I don't think an unselfish life truely exists.

 

[Rembrandtfan]

What made me think of this question is that I heard a Christian song on the radio called "So Long Self" and it made me think of what Christians are always saying about how we are supposed to make Christ the head of our lives and not self.

 

[Rebekka]

I think if Christ is truly head of our lives, we give away all our possessions to the poor and follow Him in a radical way. Also, we will remain single and celibate.

Most people don't do this. Most people are selfish to a certain degree.

 

[snoochface]

Jesus, and maybe Mother Teresa, led unselfish lives. The rest of us are all selfish in one way or another.

I know that song, So Long Self. I think it's referring to the Bible passage that says you can't live a double-minded life, you can't be in the world and be in God. I think all of us make that decision when we become Christians, or at some point during our Christian life. We understand that we need to turn away from sin and live for God.

Not one of us does it successfully, though. And many times, especially with issues like child-freedom (and cussing, apparently) what one considers sinful another does not. I don't think you're being selfish and living "in the world instead of in God" if you are doing something you honestly and prayfully do not consider to be a sin.

 

[mina]

mother thereasa, who was neither married nor had children.

Seriously, i think most people are selfish in some way. And if they are making others feel selfish b/c they don't approve of how many kids you have or that you don't have kids or aren't married or are married or whatever it is, then that in itself is selfish to want to make someone feel that way. Everyone is selfish; i'd say 99.9 % of the population in some way , shape, or form. Sooo as Christians we should be trying and striving to die to self- to help others even when we don't want to, to point others to Christ even when we don't want to, to do what God tells us to do even when we don't want to. And it has nothing to do with the type of family you are in.

 

[bluebug83]

I think if Christ is truly head of our lives, we give away all our possessions to the poor and follow Him in a radical way. Also, we will remain single and celibate.

Most people don't do this. Most people are selfish to a certain degree.

I have to disagree. Looking back on things, I wonder if God brought my husband in to my life so early because He saw that we can serve Him better as a couple than we each would on our own. I see a lot of evidence of that being true, I think we're better together not just in life but in service to Christ. And I've also had a bit of a change of my opinion on Christians having some level of wealth. I don't think having wealth in and of itself is incompatible with being a Christian, it's your attitude towards it. If you care a lot about acquiring more and more wealth and have a hard time giving freely, than having wealth is not compatible with following Christ. God needs some with wealth in the Kingdom to provide financial support to the things He wishes to do. But if you have wealth and would be totally OK if God decided to take it away, I don't think there's a problem with being a Christian and having wealth. There's actually an older retired couple at my church that have a vacation condo in Florida, and the husband told me once that they see it as a gift from God and regularly lend it out to pastors wanting a retreat, etc, and if God ever chooses to take it from them so be it. And they use their time in Florida to support a ministry down there that helps poor people and orphanages in Haiti. That's the attitude I'm talking about.

But I do agree that there has probably not been a person on Earth, save Christ, who was 100% selfless. Snooch brings up some great points, especially about doing something others consider to be a sin when you prayerfully believe it is not. This is something I have thought about recently, what happens to Christians who do something believing it is not a sin but it actually turns out to be one? Example, what if when we all get to heaven we find out it actually is sinful to never have children? I think it really falls on the heart. If one is doing something because one truly believes he/she is following God and doing right when it actually is not, I easily see God having mercy on that person. But I think there are some that convince themselves something is right because they really really want it, even though they see evidence to the contrary, but do it anyway because what they want is more important to them than following Christ. That is what I think is selfish and what God will judge, not necessarily the outward actions of an individual.

And think about what Jesus said about how some will do outward good but they will have received their award in full because they trumpet it in the streets - that is selfish, even though they are "giving".

 

[HuntingMan]

Sel-fish:
1. condemning and speaking poorly of anyone who doesn't do things the way I do them mySELF.

 

[HuntingMan]

Do some folks HAVE kids for selfish reasons ?

1. family will think better of ME if I push a some kids for them.

2. kids are a great way to keep from being lonely in my old age.
2b. kids can take care of ME when Im old
2c. kids can keep ME from having to be put in a nursing home later.

3. kids will make my spouse love ME more


Im guessing given some time we could make quite a list of selfish reasons why some folks do have kids.

 

[bluebug83]

Do some folks HAVE kids for selfish reasons ?

1. family will think better of ME if I push a some kids for them.

2. kids are a great way to keep from being lonely in my old age.
2b. kids can take care of ME when Im old
2c. kids can keep ME from having to be put in a nursing home later.

3. kids will make my spouse love ME more


Im guessing given some time we could make quite a list of selfish reasons why some folks do have kids.

Agreed. I think we've had discussions before about how there are more selfish reasons to have kids rather than selfless reasons to have kids. Actually, pretty much anyone who makes a conscious choice to have kids probably has some reason that is at least somewhat selfish in nature.

 

[Rembrandtfan]

Actually, pretty much anyone who makes a conscious choice to have kids probably has some reason that is at least somewhat selfish in nature.

I guess for some, it's the same reason one would become a surgeon, or a missionary. They get some satisfaction and reward out of it.

Some Christians confuse me the way they define "unselfish". They want to pick and choose which desires are ok, and which are not. It's like you're supposed to go through life gritting your teeth through everything.

 

[Rebekka]

I guess for some, it's the same reason one would become a surgeon, or a missionary. They get some satisfaction and reward out of it.

Some Christians confuse me the way they define "unselfish". They want to pick and choose which desires are ok, and which are not. It's like you're supposed to go through life gritting your teeth through everything.

Yes. I don't think God created us to hate life. We're allowed to pursue happiness. I don't get the obsession with misery and suffering. Christianity is a message of great joy.

 

[Oblivious]

To me total unselfiness are those who sell everything they own and serve God as missionaries or by dedicating their lives to helping others.

 

[progressivegal]

Mother Theresa? St. Francis? Jesus? Buddha? The Dali Llama?