What does it mean to be a member of a church

[mtjoanna]

Hello; so, I am not a Calvinist, but am seriously dating a man who is a member of a Reformed Baptist Church. We met online and after several months of correspondence and phone calls, and a few trips back and forth (Montana to Maine) decided that we needed to live a wee bit closer to further the relationship. As I had the most stable job, he moved here (to the same state, we are not living together) and is currently attending my church.

Last night, the topic came up of my joining his church if we move back to his home if we marry. My understanding of church membership is that you state that you accept the church doctrine. I have seriously examined his Calvinist viewpoints and cannot honestly state that I am in agreement with them (I am not looking at getting into a Calvinist/Arminian debate here). My main question is whether becoming a member of a Reformed Church would entail saying that I agree with the doctrines? If so, I don't see how I can honestly become a member at his church. Thanks for your input.

 

[cajunhillbilly]

That is the same reason I have never become a member at the Baptist Church that I attend. I am a Reformed Anglican who started attending a Baptist Church 6 years ago because they had a ministry to singles over 40 and I was recently widowed. But I do not hold to believers baptism and have a high view of the Lord's Supper. So I attend the church but do not become a member. May eventually become a member of a conservative Anglican church near me.

 

[heymikey80]

It seriously depends upon the church. You've hit that fine line in history in organizing a church

A Reformed Baptist church may follow Reformed church construction, in which there may be only certain doctrinal items involved.

Or it may follow Baptist church construction, in which certain specifics of doctrine define who may be a member.

Generally Baptist churches specify the doctrines on which they are agreed and collect as members of their church, and wouldn't begrudge your not joining due to differing with them, doctrinally.

This whole distinctive was actually introduced around the time the Baptists distinguished themselves. Around this time John Locke wrote a letter on religious toleration describing (or specifying) how churches divided into communions by doctrine, and not by Who they relied on (the Westminster Standard). Among Presbyterian churches the divide is not over doctrine (or shouldn't be).

So not all Reformed churches hold the same subscription to doctrine. Your question should be directed toward the church's beliefs about membership. If they require subscription to certain doctrinal items, it should be pretty clearly spelled out as a requirement for membership.

 

[Anoetos]

Most Reformed churches do not require members to confess full subscription to all the doctrines of the church. It is sufficient to know what the church teaches and believes and to confess willingness to be under the guidance of the elders.

 

[AMR]

Hello; so, I am not a Calvinist, but am seriously dating a man who is a member of a Reformed Baptist Church. We met online and after several months of correspondence and phone calls, and a few trips back and forth (Montana to Maine) decided that we needed to live a wee bit closer to further the relationship. As I had the most stable job, he moved here (to the same state, we are not living together) and is currently attending my church.

Last night, the topic came up of my joining his church if we move back to his home if we marry. My understanding of church membership is that you state that you accept the church doctrine. I have seriously examined his Calvinist viewpoints and cannot honestly state that I am in agreement with them (I am not looking at getting into a Calvinist/Arminian debate here). My main question is whether becoming a member of a Reformed Church would entail saying that I agree with the doctrines? If so, I don't see how I can honestly become a member at his church. Thanks for your input.

What discussions have you had with your potential mate about this matter?