What are the Biblical grounds for divorce according to Scripture?

[AmericanSamurai]

I know that sexual infidelity is one of them, as well as abandonment. The others aren't so clear to me. What are the other situations?

 

[Lavender Blush]

I know that sexual infidelity is one of them, as well as abandonment. The others aren't so clear to me. What are the other situations?

Unrepentant, in other words repeatedly committing the offense even if they've repented, sexual immorality is one condition. Like addiction to porn. Adultery. A predelection for strip clubs.

Being an unbeliever, turning atheist or leaving the Christian faith and entering another religion. Abandonment, as you mentioned.

 

[bsd058]

Unrepentant, in other words repeatedly committing the offense even if they've repented, sexual immorality is one condition. Like addiction to porn. Adultery. A predelection for strip clubs. Being an unbeliever, turning atheist or leaving the Christian faith and entering another religion. Abandonment, as you mentioned.

Being or becoming an unbeliever does not release a believing spouse from their marriage covenant. Please see 1 Cor 7.

Sexual immorality (Matt 19:9), and abandonment (1 Cor 7:15) are the only reasons I know of that are legitimate reasons to divorce a spouse.

 

[twin1954]

Did Christ divorce you when you went whoring? Aren't you thankful that He didn't? The picture is Hosea and his harlot wife.

While God never condones divorce He does allow it to keep men/women from killing their spouses.

My wife married and unbelieving rebel who committed ever kind of foul affront to our marriage possible. But she didn't believe in divorce and stuck with me. We have been married forty years now.

The fact is it ain't about you and your happiness. Happiness has nothing to do with marriage. It is about commitment.

Does God forgive those who divorce? The Gospel is about forgiveness.

 

[AmericanSamurai]

Thanks for your input twin. I'm just trying to walk wisely in the area of relationships and be discerning.

 

[bsd058]

Thanks for your input twin. I'm just trying to walk wisely in the area of relationships and be discerning.

The word of God teaches us how to discern right from wrong. If Jesus and Paul both give some reasons where divorce is a legitimate option, who am I to question their authority in the matter? I don't claim to understand all of the underlying reasons for the legitimacy of the options given, I just know that the Lord and his apostle were fairly explicit about divorce.

 

[KWCrazy]

Matthew 19:
3 Some Pharisees came to him to test him. They asked, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?”

4 “Haven’t you read,” he replied, “that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’[a] 5 and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? 6 So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”

7 “Why then,” they asked, “did Moses command that a man give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?”

8 Jesus replied, “Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning. 9 I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.”

 

[AmericanSamurai]

So it is basically sexual infidelity and abandonment...

 

[twin1954]

So it is basically sexual infidelity and abandonment...

While that does seem to be the case, at least at first glance, they should never be taken as an excuse or as an out. Never enter into marriage thinking that there is a Biblical reason for divorce. Enter into marriage with a committed heart that will never divorce. You will find that you are more willing to work out problems if you are committed.

That is why you should never enter into marriage until you can make that commitment.

 

[AmericanSamurai]

twin, the biblical grounds for divorce are great reasons to divorce. I could never trust a wife again who was unfaithful. Of course I can forgive, but I just won't be able to trust again.

 

[twin1954]

twin, the biblical grounds for divorce are great reasons to divorce. I could never trust a wife again who was unfaithful. Of course I can forgive, but I just won't be able to trust again.

While they may be biblical, in that they allow divorce, they should never be the norm. As to you being able to trust a wife again who has strayed you cannot say that you couldn't. Though it takes a long time trust can be earned again.

You are approaching this from the wrong perspective. You are making it about you. Marriage isn't about you. It is about the one you are married to. Christ and the church are the Biblical example. If you love your wife and put her before yourself and she does the same for you then there is no temptation to stray, On your part or hers. The fact is that most people who stray, of course there are the exceptions of the inherently evil ones who stray because they can, do so because they are not getting what they need at home. Give her what she needs and you will not have a problem. As I said marriage isn't about you it is about your spouse.

In all honesty the fact that you are seeking to find biblical reasons for divorce tells me that you are not really committed to a marriage. If I recall you are single aren't you? I wouldn't recommend that you even consider marriage until you are ready to commit yourself to it no matter what.

 

[AmericanSamurai]

twin, you got me all wrong. No one ever plans on getting divorced, but it does happen. of course I don't wish it to be the norm.

I am committed to marriage, you don't really know me. If you ever come to Grace Bible church on the West Coast we need to have a beer. I know that I could never trust anyone if they violated the marriage covenant, I could forgive, but not forget.

Divorce is absolutely not an option for me, unless in the cases outlined by Scripture.

 

[AmericanSamurai]

I know that marriage isn't solely about "me", but I am involved in it.

 

[AmericanSamurai]

As to you being able to trust a wife again who has strayed you cannot say that you couldn't. Though it takes a long time trust can be earned again.

Yes I can say that, because I know myself well enough. If you feel that you can trust again if someone violated your trust then more power to you.

 

[JM]

I know what the scriptures teach concerning this subject but I doubt I could forgive and move on. Maybe forgive but never forget, living a life filled with mistrust and doubt.

O' wretched man that I am!

 

[twin1954]

There is a difference between cannot and will not. You can forgive and trust again. The question is will you?

Doing what is right is never easy!

I know that we want to make them suffer as much as they made us suffer. But it only results in both continuing to suffer.

If they seek forgiveness give it and let them earn your trust again.

 

[twin1954]

twin, you got me all wrong. No one ever plans on getting divorced, but it does happen. of course I don't wish it to be the norm.

I am committed to marriage, you don't really know me. If you ever come to Grace Bible church on the West Coast we need to have a beer. I know that I could never trust anyone if they violated the marriage covenant, I could forgive, but not forget.

Divorce is absolutely not an option for me, unless in the cases outlined by Scripture.

Perhaps someday I can come out there and we will have that beer. I look forward to it.

I am not trying to condemn you or to cause you any difficulty in any way. I am only trying to give you a little different (and I believe to be the Biblical one)perspective on divorce. It just isn't cut and dried as religion would have us believe.

 

[AmericanSamurai]

It just isn't cut and dried as religion would have us believe.

Thanks twin, again when you explained it in these last two ways, I understand what you're saying.

 

[twin1954]

I know what the scriptures teach concerning this subject but I doubt I could forgive and move on. Maybe forgive but never forget, living a life filled with mistrust and doubt.

O' wretched man that I am!

Remember that there are always two sides to everything: yours and theirs. Until you can at least to some degree see it from their side you don't have the whole picture. An outsider looking in can easily see that both are usually at fault when things go wrong but it is rare that either of the parties involved see it until it is too late.

I know that when a spouse is unfaithful it is a betrayal and that betrayal blinds and rips us apart. But a truly honest person will try to find out how they took part in it by their own lack of care. Once you can acknowledge your part in it the easier it becomes to forgive and move on.

 

[AmericanSamurai]

Cheating is a a forgiveable sin for me, but I can't continue in the relationship anymore after that. I know other people may be able to trust again, but it's something that I can't also won't do. I mean why should I, if I value and hold the marriage covenant by being disciplined enough to keep my pants on even when problems arise, I think that she should be able to as well. I don't think that is unreasonable.