Wah. The honeymoon is over!

[AngelusSax]

Basically, the approach that I'm taking with the overall ministry is to preach solid gospel and encourage deep discipleship. What I'm thinking is if our eyes are all focused on Jesus, then the other things will fall into place, too.

Amen to that!

 

[alaskamolly]

I read the OP and instantly thought, "Welcome to the Game!"




I think the best spiritual leaders are the ones that let it hurt them. But, like Moses, they find their identity in Yahweh and not in what the congregation (or anyone else) says. And when the congregation rises up in anger, the best spiritual leaders throw themselves on their face before God (rather than trying to justify or constantly pacify) and say, "YOU be the Judge!"


So many people forget that spiritual leaders are still PEOPLE. They wrongly put them up on a pedastal (and, if I may say so, I think that most pastors are only too happy to allow themselves to be placed there, which is a major root of the problem). There are sooooo many hurts that will come your way, though the ones in the first years I think can be the most painful (just because it's a shock that people can really be so mean!)...


Giving yourself for the growth and nurturing of others is basically placing yourself in a perilous position--in order to love them fully, you must be vulnerable fully.

Yet God calls our vulnerability our STRENGTH, when He said we are to be clothed in the "armor of light." The armor of light...Isn't armor meant to hide? Light is a funny armor--you can see right through it! But that's what God says our armor is, the fact that we aren't hiding anything, aren't trying to justify anything, aren't trying to defend or kiss up or placate men (because our ministry is firstly unto GOD, and it's HIS smile we are after, not the Head Deacon's Wife, not the rich tithers who are threatening to leave unless you paint the pews the color that they like, blah blah blah...

Anyways, I guess all this just to say it's a hard road at first, one I haven't particularly cared for, but one that I've really appreciated (growing through). It's taught me a LOT, that's for sure!


Blessings,
Molly
(Not a "head pastor" per ordination by man, but certainly giften in "sheperdess" areas by ordination of God--*grin*)

 

[Macrina]

I read the OP and instantly thought, "Welcome to the Game!"




I think the best spiritual leaders are the ones that let it hurt them. But, like Moses, they find their identity in Yahweh and not in what the congregation (or anyone else) says. And when the congregation rises up in anger, the best spiritual leaders throw themselves on their face before God (rather than trying to justify or constantly pacify) and say, "YOU be the Judge!"


So many people forget that spiritual leaders are still PEOPLE. They wrongly put them up on a pedastal (and, if I may say so, I think that most pastors are only too happy to allow themselves to be placed there, which is a major root of the problem). There are sooooo many hurts that will come your way, though the ones in the first years I think can be the most painful (just because it's a shock that people can really be so mean!)...


Giving yourself for the growth and nurturing of others is basically placing yourself in a perilous position--in order to love them fully, you must be vulnerable fully.

Yet God calls our vulnerability our STRENGTH, when He said we are to be clothed in the "armor of light." The armor of light...Isn't armor meant to hide? Light is a funny armor--you can see right through it! But that's what God says our armor is, the fact that we aren't hiding anything, aren't trying to justify anything, aren't trying to defend or kiss up or placate men (because our ministry is firstly unto GOD, and it's HIS smile we are after, not the Head Deacon's Wife, not the rich tithers who are threatening to leave unless you paint the pews the color that they like, blah blah blah...

Anyways, I guess all this just to say it's a hard road at first, one I haven't particularly cared for, but one that I've really appreciated (growing through). It's taught me a LOT, that's for sure!


Blessings,
Molly
(Not a "head pastor" per ordination by man, but certainly giften in "sheperdess" areas by ordination of God--*grin*)

Thanks for your input, Molly. I think you are right that this vulnerability is a crucial part of ministry. In some ways, I grieve over the state of the church, and this thread was prompted by a real low point. I think a lot of ministry is about providing hope, discipleship, and accountability to the situations that grieve us -- or rather, that grieve God.

One thing that I am learning is the importance of having others, especially others more experienced in ministry, for talking things over and for prayer. That has really helped me manage difficult situations with God-given grace. It has also helped me see where God is at work and celebrate!

I learned a bit of congregational history that sheds some light on what's been going on. Apparently, the church was divided into factions about a guest preacher, from another denomination, who wanted to be this congregation's pastor. Problem is, he refused to try and meet the academic requirements of our denomination, so there was nothing the Pastor Nominating Committee could do but continue the search... which eventually led them to me. During the interim years, the supporters of this other pastor spent a lot of energy in badmouthing the committee. So when the committee nominated me, these others were predisposed not to like me, because I wasn't their first choice. That, combined with layers and layers of related problems, seems to be part of what I'm experiencing now. It helps to understand the situation a little bit more, and to realize that this problem is WAY bigger than me. With that kind of understanding, I can put on the armor of light (as you said) and get back to work.

 

[kidsminister]

It really does sound like you are going through what most pastors face. I have the perspective, but I am not a pastor, that you don't have to keep everyone in your fellowship. If you do something you believe to be scriptural, and people leave, give them your blessing, and pray they find the church that they fit into. If they will accept it try to maintain contact. It will help you to have ties to other pastors, and limit the rivalry mentality.

My pastor in Jacksonville, FL has lost members over things like taking down the alter railings, and replacing the pews with stackable chairs, (his mother left the church over that one). He took down the alter railings to make the statement that he was human just like the rest of us.

His OWN MOTHER left over that? And I thought I had it bad...

 

[kidsminister]

Thanks for your input, Molly. I think you are right that this vulnerability is a crucial part of ministry. In some ways, I grieve over the state of the church, and this thread was prompted by a real low point. I think a lot of ministry is about providing hope, discipleship, and accountability to the situations that grieve us -- or rather, that grieve God.

One thing that I am learning is the importance of having others, especially others more experienced in ministry, for talking things over and for prayer. That has really helped me manage difficult situations with God-given grace. It has also helped me see where God is at work and celebrate!

I learned a bit of congregational history that sheds some light on what's been going on. Apparently, the church was divided into factions about a guest preacher, from another denomination, who wanted to be this congregation's pastor. Problem is, he refused to try and meet the academic requirements of our denomination, so there was nothing the Pastor Nominating Committee could do but continue the search... which eventually led them to me. During the interim years, the supporters of this other pastor spent a lot of energy in badmouthing the committee. So when the committee nominated me, these others were predisposed not to like me, because I wasn't their first choice. That, combined with layers and layers of related problems, seems to be part of what I'm experiencing now. It helps to understand the situation a little bit more, and to realize that this problem is WAY bigger than me. With that kind of understanding, I can put on the armor of light (as you said) and get back to work.

Macrina - I am SO with you here...I don't have my credentials yet (That's coming in April ), but I am the children's ministry director at my church. Our staff has just been dealing with a similar situation (factions, no one being happy, small church, yada, yada), and what God has been saying to both me and our youth pastor is, in the words of the old Christmas carol:

"Then pealed the bells more loud and deep,
God is not dead, nor doth He sleep.
The wrong shall fail, the right prevail
With peace on earth, good will to men."

Gossipy ladies who act like middle-schoolers (yes, we've got a few of those, too) are never going to go away. I've looked in my church by-laws...there's no way to get rid of them, lol!. But if you are doing what God has called you to do, He will bless you, and He is on your side. Let it be their problem, as my mom is so fond of saying! That's easier said than done, I admit, but we are here for you if you need to vent!!