• The General Mental Health Forum is now a Read Only Forum. As we had two large areas making it difficult for many to find, we decided to combine the Mental Health & the Recovery sections of the forum into Mental Health & Recovery as a whole. Physical Health still remains as it's own area within the entire Recovery area.

    If you are having struggles, need support in a particular area that you aren't finding a specific recovery area forum, you may find the General Struggles forum a great place to post. Any any that is related to emotions, self-esteem, insomnia, anger, relationship dynamics due to mental health and recovery and other issues that don't fit better in another forum would be examples of topics that might go there.

    If you have spiritual issues related to a mental health and recovery issue, please use the Recovery Related Spiritual Advice forum. This forum is designed to be like Christian Advice, only for recovery type of issues. Recovery being like a family in many ways, allows us to support one another together. May you be blessed today and each day.

    Kristen.NewCreation and FreeinChrist

  • Starting today August 7th, 2024, in order to post in the Married Couples, Courting Couples, or Singles forums, you will not be allowed to post if you have your Marital status designated as private. Announcements will be made in the respective forums as well but please note that if yours is currently listed as Private, you will need to submit a ticket in the Support Area to have yours changed.

  • CF has always been a site that welcomes people from different backgrounds and beliefs to participate in discussion and even debate. That is the nature of its ministry. In view of recent events emotions are running very high. We need to remind people of some basic principles in debating on this site. We need to be civil when we express differences in opinion. No personal attacks. Avoid you, your statements. Don't characterize an entire political party with comparisons to Fascism or Communism or other extreme movements that committed atrocities. CF is not the place for broad brush or blanket statements about groups and political parties. Put the broad brushes and blankets away when you come to CF, better yet, put them in the incinerator. Debate had no place for them. We need to remember that people that commit acts of violence represent themselves or a small extreme faction.

  • We hope the site problems here are now solved, however, if you still have any issues, please start a ticket in Contact Us

Vows

Jump to latest Follow Reply
Sort by date Sort by votes
E

ec154

Guest
I am worried that i may have made a vow not to date or marry the girl i am currently dating. I truely love this girl and believe she is the one God has intended for me to be with, however i am plagued by this thought that i may have vowed not to marry her. I am worried that i will be sinning by being married to her. I have always had a problem with vows and they have ran my life and for years i have lived in bondage to them. I think i may have OCD and looking back i have had symptoms of it throughout my entire life. Such as excessively washing my hands when i was a kid, checking to make sure doors are locked time after time, having really bad unwanted thoughts about doing stuff to people that would just really disgust me. After reading some of the posts her on Christian Forums OCD section i realize that i am not alone on all of these issues i have had. The biggest of all of my issues are the ones of vows i have made. I used to make a vow and say if i do not do this certain thing then i would go to hell. I am over the worry of going to hell now thought as i believe the Lord has forgiven me of all my sins. My biggest concern now is my certain situation of marrying the woman i love. I really want to marry her and i feel as though she is the one God has given me but i do not want to be sinning in marrying her. All of the verses in the Bible on vows really bring guilt on me. I dont even know for 100% sure that i even made the vow, but I just want to be in good standing with God. I also worry about the verse in Proverbs about God distroying the work of you hands if you do not fulfill your vow. I do not want him to destroy my marraige because of the very foolish vow i made before. Does anyone have any advice for me?
 
S

Skitsskat

Newbie
Jan 2, 2012
79
8
✟22,738.00
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Single
The thing about OCD and vows is that you can subconsciously make a vow in your mind and not to God and it can haunt your mind for the rest of your life, think back and recall if you were talking to God at the time or even used the word vow, I've done that all the time and just have to repeat to myself that it wasn't a vow. But talk to God about it, first of all pray for forgiveness if you have made that vow and ask if you can have another chance with this girl. Talk to him about marrying her and if God decides no due to the vow then it's a no, but God is forgiving and will understand if the vow was made by OCD.

God bless!
 
Upvote 0
E

ec154

Guest
I dont really remember if it was to God or just in my mind and i realize i have done both types of vows throughout my life and i have no clue if it was to God or just in my head. I remember telling God that i would not date several girls for some reason i sort of like made a list of girls i would not date and i dont remember if she was one of them or not. And i have been praying for an answer and everytime i get peace about it and feel i have an answer from got another situation will pop up in my head where i might of vowed away my freedom to marry her. I have also had instances where i would say if i dont do a certain things then i would have to vow not to date her. i know all this sounds crazy but its something that i am really struggling with and i dont know which way to turn. I actually really though i got my answer from God about it and was going to buy an engagement ring this week but now i am having those flashbacks again. What if i marry her then remember exactly what i vowed do i then have to get a divorce? i dont know what to do does this sound like OCD? i have never been to a therapast
 
Upvote 0
S

Skitsskat

Newbie
Jan 2, 2012
79
8
✟22,738.00
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Single
It's not crazy at all! In fact the same thing will happen to me, I could vow to never watch a certain episode of a certain show and then watch more episodes and think "Wait, was it THIS episode I vowed not to watch? Ok just in case." Then do the same thing with practically every episode. Trust me, your situation is so normal compared to me haha. It defiantly sounds like OCD, try researching ocd and obsessive vow making.
But God knows about your OCD and if you can't even remember making the vow it was more then likely OCD. Try thinking back again, did the vows feel forced in your mind? Like you had to make them? That usually is what happens with me.
 
Upvote 0
E

ec154

Guest
Ok i will for sure do some research on that! yes it normally originally starts like that and then i would make a real vow to try to cancel the 1st one out and so on. It has been going on forever sometimes worse than others. With my gf i actually vowed that i would marry her (after i was afraid that i made the vow not to marry her) and it was to God for sure that her and i would serve him. That is probably the one i should follow i think. It is really a relief tho to know i am not the only one dealing with this!
 
Upvote 0
F

followJesus1811

Newbie
Jan 27, 2012
53
2
✟22,675.00
Faith
Non-Denom
Check the word of God. 1 Corinthians 7 is great. Those who marry do not sin. It's better to marry than to burn with passion.

This is your OCD. 2 Timothy 1 is great because it says that God did not give us a spirit of fear. Live in the freedom that Christ has purchased.

Ask God for forgiveness and move on.

Pray for wisdom, discernment, and self control!
 
Upvote 0
O

OCD COACHING

OCD COACHING
Mar 1, 2012
12
1
Visit site
✟22,632.00
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
ec154,

God undestands what you are going through. But more importantly, He understands you more than you understand yourself. He did create after all.

Magical thinking plays a big role in OCD. If this happens than that will happen, is very common. This thinking is a false alarm not to be trusted.

God is Love. The only way to go to hell is thru rejection of Him. From your posting, it doens't look like you are rejecting Him in rebellion. In fact, it looks like the very opposite.

If you are unsure if you made a vow, than you probably didn't chalk it up to OCD.

Try to learn how to identify which thoughts are you and which are your OCD. Anxiety, guilt, worry, etc are signs of OCD.

God's love and support will hep you in your struggle with OCD. Lean on Him, Love Him. Praise Him for his forgiveness and Grace.

Many Blessings,
 
Upvote 0
E

ec154

Guest
I am now engaged to the girl of my dreams! i have decided to put all of these vows behind me I believe that God has revealed to me to live for him and serve him and worry about my past but live for him in the future. Thanks to everyone for the encouragement! Please pray for me to stay with my current mindset and not to fall back into worrying about these crazy vows i have made.
 
Upvote 0

Similar threads

Valletta
  • Locked
Tim Walz Vows to Bring More Somalis to Minnesota, Despite Growing Fraud Scandal Reaching Into the Billions
Replies
122
Views
3K
American Politics
FreeinChrist
FreeinChrist
R
Struggling with scrupulosity.
Replies
9
Views
863
Obsessive Compulsive Disorder
Jermayn
Jermayn
R
Struggling with scrupulosity
Replies
15
Views
1K
Obsessive Compulsive Disorder
romansroad
R
B
I am comforted to know that there are others like me - Now, what about salvation?
Replies
4
Views
615
Obsessive Compulsive Disorder
Mari17
Mari17
Michie
A Priest’s Advice on Building a Great Marriage
Replies
0
Views
288
One Bread, One Body - Catholic
Michie
Michie
Top Bottom
Jump to latest Follow Reply
Jump to latest Follow Reply