Unrequited love?

[Gabe&BellaMommy]

What would be the best way for a Christian to deal with unrequited love? I've been best friends with this person for almost four years and he has been a very good friend to me. Encouraging me, giving me godly advice, uplifting me, praying for me, and me doing the same for him. As best friends we talk to each other about everything. He actually help lead me back to the Lord when I was in a backslidden state. We both desire to be married but he has told me that he only wants to continue being friends with me. Most of our arguments over the years have been about this but we always seem to reconcile and be friends again. We had another argument last week about this. It's really hurting because I truly believed that he felt the same way about me as I do him, I mean his actions have shown me this over the years. He says he loves me and has told me that many times and me him, but I think he feels that because there is a big age difference he is afraid of giving us a chance. I've dealt with heartbreak before but this is really one of the worse pain I have felt. Lately its been kinda hard for me to function because of all of this. I really need some godly advice on what to do. I've been praying about this but I know that sometimes when your heart is involved in matters like this it's hard to hear God. I don't know if I should continue to be friends with him or not. Any advice is much appreciated. Thank you!

 

[Ken Behrens]

Every relationship grows by stages. As you become more comfortable with someone, you share something more. Then, if they are not comfortable with that, the relationship only grows to that point.

There is no solution, except the old adage: "if you love someone, let them be free to leave. If they love you enough, they will come back." yes, it hurts, but there is no other answer. Think how much God hurts when any one of us leaves Him.

So if you love him enough, you will welcome him back. If you are tired of this behavior, it will not. That is the course of life. If you loved with the love of Christ, it will never have been wasted.

 

[LinkH]

That's a tough one. You could consider the verse, 'Thou shalt not covet' on the one hand, and pray about your heart to make sure it is right on the issue.

You can't force him to feel the same way about you, or to think the decision you want him to make is the best for him. Surrender it to God, and pray if it is the Lord's will, that He will lead the man to the right decision. But be willing to give this man up.

 

[GTW27]

What would be the best way for a Christian to deal with unrequited love? I've been best friends with this person for almost four years and he has been a very good friend to me. Encouraging me, giving me godly advice, uplifting me, praying for me, and me doing the same for him. As best friends we talk to each other about everything. He actually help lead me back to the Lord when I was in a backslidden state. We both desire to be married but he has told me that he only wants to continue being friends with me. Most of our arguments over the years have been about this but we always seem to reconcile and be friends again. We had another argument last week about this. It's really hurting because I truly believed that he felt the same way about me as I do him, I mean his actions have shown me this over the years. He says he loves me and has told me that many times and me him, but I think he feels that because there is a big age difference he is afraid of giving us a chance. I've dealt with heartbreak before but this is really one of the worse pain I have felt. Lately its been kinda hard for me to function because of all of this. I really need some godly advice on what to do. I've been praying about this but I know that sometimes when your heart is involved in matters like this it's hard to hear God. I don't know if I should continue to be friends with him or not. Any advice is much appreciated. Thank you!

 

[GTW27]

"Love does not have an age"

 

[LinkH]

Just curious. how big is the age difference?

 

[Gabe&BellaMommy]

Just curious. how big is the age difference?

Just curious. how big is the age difference?

Hello LinkH sorry for the late reply. There is exactly a 20 year age difference between us both, which is why I can kinda understand his reservations in entering into a relationship.

 

[LinkH]

Well, if he either thinks of you as a dear friend, a kind of surrogate daughter, a sister, or just doesn't want to marry someone much younger than he, then you should accept that and not pressure him. You can pray, though. Be careful with that. The Bible does say, "Thou shalt not covet."

 

[GoldenKingGaze]

Ask for others to give you words of knowledge. Test them.