I haven't actually entirely become Christian yet, but I feel like I'm really getting there. Last week I took a load of Cds down to the charity shop, because I felt drawn to do so. My whole life, I've always been a big heavy metal fan. I was listening to stuff and hanging out with music fans who were influencing me in a bad way. I was listening to alot of extreme Norwegian black metal, stuff that encourages depression, suicide, violence, cruelty and just downright misery. I was also listening to alot of 80's glam metal that encourages promiscuity and treats women like objects. I was friends with people who devoted their whole lives to this stuff and it led to me doing many things I regret - casual sex, tattoos, self-mutilation, drugs, a suicide attempt, Satanism. It led to me being raped and imprisoned against my will by my rapist. It led to me allowing myself to be used by different men. I have scars, tattoos and piercing holes that I want rid of. Somewhere out there someone has photos of me posing in lingerie and I hate the thought of that. All of this happened because I was living the lifestyle of the music that I was involved in. My whole life was devoted to heavy metal and me and all my friends wanted to emulate that lifestyle. I have cut out of my life people who are still into that lifestyle, and I got rid of alot of my CDs, posters and music videos. I got rid of the worst ones, the ones that promote suicide, depression, self-mutilation and casual sex.
I haven't gotten rid of all of them though. I still enjoy the sound of rock and metal, and there are some bands out there, not just Christian bands but others too, who create beautiful metal and rock music without that negativity.