Trust

[Kazamataz]

Why is it:

When your a kid you can't be trusted?

When your a teenager they say you'll be trusted when your an adult?

But in your 20's still your parents don't trust you?

Will there ever be a time in my life when my mum won't worry unnecessarily and just realize i'm an adult and i can be trusted to make the right decisions?

 

[olafias]

In my experience, probably not! I'm 24, I'm married, I graduated from college, I built a house, bought two vehicles, have managed our mortgage and money for several years, successfully raised a dog, haven't killed all of my plants (yet), work full time juggling one permant job and subbing positions at two area schools, figured out our taxes successfully, pay all our bills on time, and still my mother worries about my decisions!

 

[RoseofLima]

Yes...I think so. It just takes time. I never thought my parents would actually trust me or think I was competent as an adult-- but they have seen me persevere through some huge challenges as an adult and really have come to accept that I can make good, well thought out, prayerful decisions--as well as persevere when things are rough.

It just took time, though! PLus, now I have way more kids than they ever had- so there's no way they can asser themselves as parenting experts over an above me

 

[PegasusOnFire]

I am going to be 26 in 7 weeks and my mother still treats me as a child, I have a 2 year old, married a man my parents don't like, though before I married him they liked him, I have a house of my own before my twin sister, who is their "perfect" child, and I refuse to move to their state, so I guess that is why I am still a kid in their eyes.

 

[Kazamataz]

My mum thinks im throwing my life away by having this baby.

I've only got 4 weeks to go, so it's not like i can really send the baby back now can i?

besides i don't want to, my husband and i are so excited about this baby and we can't wait till he/she is born.

But my mum is really pushing me to get rid of it. she thinks it's going to destroy my marriage (this i don't understand?) and she believes i'm going to end up living at her place a single parent.

this baby has done nothing but bring my husband and I closer together but my mum is just so determined that it's going to be the end of us.

I really don't get it!?!

 

[olafias]

I'm sorry Kazamataz! It is really awful that your mother thinks that! Isn't she excited to have a grandchild? Well, maybe after she sees the baby everything will change for the better. I hope so! You will be in my prayers!

 

[Kazamataz]

thank-you i just dont understand why she's acting this way until this weekend she was stoked she was going to have a grandbaby.

 

[PegasusOnFire]

Maybe something happened to someone she knows, and now she is worried it will happen to you.

 

[Beth1231]

Or she is remembering her own past regrets?

 

[ChildByGrace]

Parents are funny things. Just rememeber that when this baby is grown up you'll probably go through the same feelings as she is going through.

 

[Kazamataz]

Or she is remembering her own past regrets?

I think you might be right with that one her husband left her with two kids under two after a year of marriage.

it's just really taken me by surprize!

 

[-~Truth_N_Trust~-]

I don't think my mum will ever trust me, she's not a christian tho so everything I do is because I'm 'brainwashed', causes a bit of tension!

Also, my mum went even worse after I had my baby girl, she became much more demanding of time/respect and especially resented the fact that my husband has more say over my child's upbringing than she does - of course!?!

Anyway, Kazamataz, i'm sorry you are having to go through this instead of just enjoying your pregnancy! My only advice is to just prayerfully do what you believe is right, loving your mum but standing firm, hopefully she will see + accept the way you are living and just enjoy her grandchild!

 

[-~Truth_N_Trust~-]

just read your other post, it all comes from my mums past too, she has had 4 failed marriages to her name so doesn't understand the faith I have in mine...

I hope that it's just the emotions of the situation that are bringing these feelings out from her, and hopefully it will all calm down in time.

 

[icbeckyc]

Why is it:

When your a kid you can't be trusted?

When your a teenager they say you'll be trusted when your an adult?

But in your 20's still your parents don't trust you?

Will there ever be a time in my life when my mum won't worry unnecessarily and just realize i'm an adult and i can be trusted to make the right decisions?

Hmm can't answer that. Still waiting. lol

I get lectures from time to time. I know my brothers get even more. So I guess I am the favorite. lol (No one is here to correct me)

I think parents never stop worrying. They have been where we are and are always trying to let us know.