Transgender son

[Yarddog]

As a christian mother am I wrong supporting him?

Support is loving him. That doesn't mean that you have to agree with him. He needs to know that your love is there and you both need to be honest with each other on how you feel, in a loving way.

Educate yourself on this matter so that you can make informed decisions which may lead to a future where you both can be happy and not regret bad decisions made because the fear of embarrassment guided you.

 

[spiritman1]

I'm betting that Verticordious is not really educated or trained in a profession necessary to properly evaluate such a person IN PERSON let alone play armchair psychologist across the internet. There are reasons why places that for example, determine if a person is eligable for sex reassignment surgery must go through a battery of tests and other things before it is determined if they are truely transgender and that the surgery is the best option for them. Better a real and ethically sound professional work with a young man or woman to determine their biopsychological state than people who are in no position to make any informed commentary on the matter.

yes and how many of these trained professionals actually believe the bible, I really don't care much what your so called trained professionals have to say, having been there done that, I can tell this mother the truth! its a strong delusion, its a deception from the pit of hell, you should no more accept this demonic attack as you would a daughter who is 75lbs and thinks she's fat! and is starving herself because her mind and body tell her she's fat. Yes! this deception of anorexia is very apparent to the rest of us, because we can see she's strarving to death, when satan deceives ones mind into believing a lie, It isn't always apparent such as sexual orientation, but I can tell you from my own experience and freedom from this deception, and I was as gay as you can get. the first step in finding freedom is believing the truth. what is the truth for the starving girl, should you except her plea's to not eat, because she believes she's fat? heck no! I would begin prayer and fasting for deliverence on her behalf. Jesus said "the truth will set you free" this is the key! for freedom from these demonic deceptions, rebuke the lie's as they enter the mind casting down false imaginations, pushing evil away. It is very much like the worst possible drug addiction, deep down you want it really bad, you crave and think about it contantly, but after more and more time goes by, and you are successful at not giving in to feed the addiction, like all addictions it goes away, I (by the grace of God) do not even think the way I used to, everything is changed. my mind isn't constantly bombarded every minute with sinful thoughts, Its my testimony that sexual deceptions are exactly like delusions suffered by anorexics, their minds are not lining up with the truth of their bodies, they can even look into a mirror and swear by God that they're fat, and you plainly see the skin hanging on bones. ITS A sATANIC DECEPTION BOTTOM LINE.......find some REAL Christians that know how to help.......there's plenty of counterfeits that are telling you to encourage his descision......love him and tell him the truth PS... my wife and I are both set free from these satanic delusions, and who the Son sets free are free indeed! there is victory in Jesus and believing the truth of His word....every word!

 

[BlessEwe]

yes and how many of these trained professionals actually believe the bible, I really don't care much what your so called trained professionals have to say, having been there done that, I can tell this mother the truth! its a strong delusion, its a deception from the pit of hell, you should no more accept this demonic attack as you would a daughter who is 75lbs and thinks she's fat! and is starving herself because her mind and body tell her she's fat. Yes! this deception of anorexia is very apparent to the rest of us, because we can see she's strarving to death, when satan deceives ones mind into believing a lie, It isn't always apparent such as sexual orientation, but I can tell you from my own experience and freedom from this deception, and I was as gay as you can get. the first step in finding freedom is believing the truth. what is the truth for the starving girl, should you except her plea's to not eat, because she believes she's fat? heck no! I would begin prayer and fasting for deliverence on her behalf. Jesus said "the truth will set you free" this is the key! for freedom from these demonic deceptions, rebuke the lie's as they enter the mind casting down false imaginations, pushing evil away. It is very much like the worst possible drug addiction, deep down you want it really bad, you crave and think about it contantly, but after more and more time goes by, and you are successful at not giving in to feed the addiction, like all addictions it goes away, I (by the grace of God) do not even think the way I used to, everything is changed. my mind isn't constantly bombarded every minute with sinful thoughts, Its my testimony that sexual deceptions are exactly like delusions suffered by anorexics, their minds are not lining up with the truth of their bodies, they can even look into a mirror and swear by God that they're fat, and you plainly see the skin hanging on bones. ITS A sATANIC DECEPTION BOTTOM LINE.......find some REAL Christians that know how to help.......there's plenty of counterfeits that are telling you to encourage his descision......love him and tell him the truth PS... my wife and I are both set free from these satanic delusions, and who the Son sets free are free indeed! there is victory in Jesus and believing the truth of His word....every word!

Thank you everyone who has posted, I am so very glad I asked this here, as this has helped me so very much on all sides.


I will say ( being I am an addiction specialist counselor ) the subconscious part of the brain has changed with addiction and it will always be part of you, although through tools and support you can learn to live without it, although there is always a possibility of relapse if your not taking care of yourself. Spiritually, Physically,Mentally, and Emotionally.

Stuffing it and ignoring it, or denying it will result in a negative alternate addiction or suicide.

My sister was mentally ill and a bunch of christians told her that she had a demon living in her. This affected her relationship with God, and her faith for the rest of her life, she died 10 years ago and I know she is with Christ.

 

[spiritman1]

Stuffing it and ignoring it, or denying it will result in a negative alternate addiction or suicide........................yes it possibly will, if it is done through a humanistic approach......but when its done through the power of the Holy Spirit! you are just as the bible states you are a new creation in Christ old things pass away.................I have to say what you may have learned and believe to be true through secular schooling has completely no bearing on what God can do, I'm no longer stuffing, ignoring or denying any of my past cravings, on the contrary I can't figure out how I even felt that way. Give God more credit to make changes that seem to the world to be impossible

 

[wannabeadesigirl]

In response to the OP: Love your child. Accept the blessing she's given you throughout her life as a male, and look forward to the blessing a daughter can give you...if you give her the chance. I'll be praying for your peace of mind in this situation.

Transgenderism was completely unknown in Biblical days, so relying on the Bible will get you no where. And Jesus is the Word of God, not a book. And he said nothing about it.

No it wasn't. The term eunuch isn't just used to describe men who've been castrated. It's used throughout the ancient world to include those born sexually ambiguous (what we call hermaphrodites), and those who chose to take on the lifestyle of the opposite gender. There isn't any reason to assume Ancient Israel didn't use the term eunuch to cover more than just castrated individuals.

Jesus did say something about eunuchs. Matthew 19:12. Some were born sexually ambiguous, or gender confused. Yet they have a place in our churches, at least according to Isaiah 56:4-5.

I can't believe people are in here calling your son "she". Way to further degrade the man God created him to be.

Gender is different from Sex. Sex is what nature has given you, thanks to chromosomes (and even those screw up. Look up XXY and XYY chromosomes). Gender is the societal labeling of sex, and that totally messes up.
For example one olympic year there was an athlete who was competing in the mens division. He had a penis, testicles, everything that society says makes him Male. Yet when they tested him for the masculine hormone Testosterone they found that he didn't produce enough for him to compete in the mens division fairly. So he was allowed to compete in the womens division.
This happened to a presumably heterosexual male, who identified as such. Couldn't the same thing happen to another male who just so happened to identify as a female because of genetic makeup?

Nature has SO much diversity that we in western society have done ourselves a huge disfavor by limiting ourselves to two genders. Did you know that your parents, in their gametes (sperm and eggs), have enough genetic information to make 64 trillion genetically diverse children? Times that by 6 billion+ and that's alot of variables to be squeezed into two measly gender labels.

For all we know the way God created her son was for him to be transgendered. There is a huge possibility for it. If that is the case then I think calling him "She" isn't degrading, but a return to a natural state for a person born in the wrong body.

 

[KellyJ]

Spiritman,

You seem very passionate about your views. However, I must respectfully disagree with you. Please do not take offense at my responses below. However, I think it is important to counter your argument with a different perspective. Too many with in the Church do not understand this condition and lop us in as "Gays". We're not the same and I feel it is important to stand up as a Christian and a transgender woman to give a different view.

Kelly

yes and how many of these trained professionals actually believe the bible, (Many of them. The team I worked with, were Christians. We dove into Scripture very indepth to include Hebrew and Greek, the original language these Scriptures were written in. From there I would pray on it asking for the Holy Spirit to lead me.)I really don't care much what your so called trained professionals have to say, having been there done that, I can tell this mother the truth! its a strong delusion, (I disagree. Gender Dysphoria is a broad brush, just like homosexuality. You have psychological, chemical, and biological components that fit in this umbrella. It takes a qualified team of specialist along with the Holy Spirit to determine the best path of treatment. As for me, I am much closer to God than I've ever been to the point I'm able to serve him in a capacity I've never been able to serve before.) its a deception from the pit of hell, (Not in all cases. None of us is more qualified than the Holy Spirit to direct our paths.)you should no more accept this demonic attack as you would a daughter who is 75lbs and thinks she's fat! and is starving herself because her mind and body tell her she's fat. (You may want to read up on this. Anorexia is a broad brush as well, to include genetic genetic factors to neurotransmitter and hormone imbalances. Contrary to popular belief, one does not just choose to be anorexic and it requires a team of doctors to understand the underlying cause and treat it), Yes! this deception of anorexia is very apparent to the rest of us, because we can see she's strarving to death, when satan deceives ones mind into believing a lie, It isn't always apparent such as sexual orientation, but I can tell you from my own experience and freedom from this deception, (And I can tell you from my own experience that the freedom to be true and authentic, has taken the barrier away between me and God. There is no more deception.) and I was as gay as you can get. the first step in finding freedom is believing the truth (I'll buy that, however, I would not just listen to anyone who has a precursory understanding of the Scriptures). what is the truth for the starving girl, should you except her plea's to not eat, because she believes she's fat? heck no! I would begin prayer and fasting for deliverence on her behalf. (And follow the Holy Spirit. This may require one to go against those who do not understand the issue at hand.)Jesus said "the truth will set you free" this is the key! for freedom from these demonic deceptions, rebuke the lie's as they enter the mind casting down false imaginations, pushing evil away. It is very much like the worst possible drug addiction, deep down you want it really bad, you crave and think about it contantly, but after more and more time goes by, and you are successful at not giving in to feed the addiction, like all addictions it goes away, I (by the grace of God) do not even think the way I used to, (I'm happy for you.) everything is changed. my mind isn't constantly bombarded every minute with sinful thoughts, Its my testimony that sexual deceptions (Gender Dysphoria has nothing to do with sexual deceptions. We are talking Gender. Two very different subjects.) are exactly like delusions suffered by anorexics, their minds are not lining up with the truth of their bodies, they can even look into a mirror and swear by God that they're fat, and you plainly see the skin hanging on bones. ITS A sATANIC DECEPTION BOTTOM LINE.......find some REAL Christians (And how do you define "Real Christians?")that know how to help.......there's plenty of counterfeits that are telling you to encourage his descision......love him and tell him the truth (More importantly be receptive to the Holy Spirit and His leading!!!) PS... my wife and I are both set free from these satanic delusions, and who the Son sets free are free indeed! there is victory in Jesus and believing the truth of His word....every word!

 

[BlessEwe]

Stuffing it and ignoring it, or denying it will result in a negative alternate addiction or suicide........................yes it possibly will, if it is done through a humanistic approach......but when its done through the power of the Holy Spirit! you are just as the bible states you are a new creation in Christ old things pass away.................I have to say what you may have learned and believe to be true through secular schooling has completely no bearing on what God can do, I'm no longer stuffing, ignoring or denying any of my past cravings, on the contrary I can't figure out how I even felt that way. Give God more credit to make changes that seem to the world to be impossible

Why do you assume that I went through a secular school? I actually went through a christian college to get my credentials and the professor is a wonderful Christian. And yes the Holy Spirit can do wonderful things, I am a walking testimony with God bringing me through some very bad situations, like for instance the murder of my mother.
I stuffed it so deep as the pain hurt so badly it almost killed me. I have a very long list of tragedies and to tell you the truth I am a bit upset with God for all of this.

I now understand it could be from the chemical and extreme amounts of estrogen put in our foods, and milk.

Things like addiction and I will put transgender into the category Can not be stuffed and ignored. There is so much about the brain that we do not understand, but the things we do know no about the brain it that it does permanently change with addiction and I am sure in years to come we will find that transgender people have something changed in their brain as well, as well as hormones.


I am very joyful for you that God has brought you through, and I may bring my son to talk with my awesome pastor. But I am not going to lay guilt on him by saying we can pray this away. I do feel this is part of him.

Also I am not ready to call him a her. This is all so hard.

Thank you Kelly for the time you spent with me talking for 2 hours. You are a very intelligent, wonderful compassionate christian woman.

 

[Jase]

No it wasn't. The term eunuch isn't just used to describe men who've been castrated. It's used throughout the ancient world to include those born sexually ambiguous (what we call hermaphrodites), and those who chose to take on the lifestyle of the opposite gender. There isn't any reason to assume Ancient Israel didn't use the term eunuch to cover more than just castrated individuals.

Jesus did say something about eunuchs. Matthew 19:12. Some were born sexually ambiguous, or gender confused. Yet they have a place in our churches, at least according to Isaiah 56:4-5.

I'm not sure we can state eunuch refered to all forms of transgenderism. Physically apparent intersex individuals may have been known, but chromosomal abnormalities, and transsexuality were not, since those all deal with DNA/brain wiring/hormones that was unknown to people back then.

 

[Armistead14]

Because Christian counselors are rarely equipped to deal with Transgender issues and will likely cause further permanent psychological damage by telling him to "pray the issue away".

I agree, for many kids raised in strong fundy christian schools and churches they often rebel using sexual issues as a reason. Most strong fundy schools and churches so corrupt normal sexuality leaving kids full of guilt and fear that they can't defeat and many often turn to sexual extremes once they reach adulthood. Not saying it's the case, but it happens a lot today, a dysfunctionaly fundy religious background mixed with the high charge of secular sexuality is quite confusing for kids today.

To go against him would just reenforce his views. Keep him in counseling.
Is he also gay, most trans are?

My guess is if he wasn't feminine before where you could pick it up it's a deeper mental issue more than genetics.

 

[LoraElise]

Is he also gay, most trans are?

Actually, that isn't a valid assertion. Gender identity and sexual orientation are two separate and unrelated things.

 

[LoraElise]

My guess is if he wasn't feminine before where you could pick it up it's a deeper mental issue more than genetics.

In order to stop the pain of being mocked, humiliated, ostracized, scolded, and even punished, gender dysphorics learn in childhood to hide their true selves. They pretend to be the person everyone expects them to be, though they are wired opposite and wholly unequipped to do so. Many become very good at it but live in constant fear of losing friends and family, should their dysphoria be detected -- and it is a cripplingly stressful way to live.

 

[Karpalokuu]

I do not know the bible enough to say if it says something of this matter. And deffinetely I have no clue what God thinks about this. But, your son/daughter needs your support now. One of the main themes in the bible is Love. Love him, no matter if you agree with him, but he eeds your love so much now.
Loving him/her and supporeting him/her does not mean you agree with him.
But he needs to know that you are there nomatter what happens. You are hishers mothers anyways.
I do now know what God wants from him or why God has sent this transgenderism to him. Maybe you need to pray and ask for Gods advise. In our human heads we really are not able to make the right decisions in all situations.
Maybe you just need to pray and aks for God to guide you trough this.
There is a reason why this happened, and maybe you just need to find it. Maybe he really is a woman trapped in mens body. God created us after all, our minds and our bodies. Maybe he just was created to be like that. Maybe this is something other and you just need to find out what and what to do with it.
I used the word maybe a lot, since I have no clue. Noone of us really knows what God is thinking.
Anyways, I will pray for you and your son and daughter to find Gods quidance trough this.
Hope I could send lots of strength and love to you!

 

[Zebra1552]

As a christian mother am I wrong supporting him?

Heck no. The church has been hounding sexual issues for centuries thinking that suppressing sexuality is a way to be spiritual. That's a load of bull. God gave us sex for a reason, to be enjoyed in a proper context. Transgendered does not fall in this realm of sex, so there is no logical reason for the church to restrict it in any way.

 

[Zebra1552]

yes and how many of these trained professionals actually believe the bible, I really don't care much what your so called trained professionals have to say, having been there done that, I can tell this mother the truth! its a strong delusion, its a deception from the pit of hell, you should no more accept this demonic attack as you would a daughter who is 75lbs and thinks she's fat! and is starving herself because her mind and body tell her she's fat. Yes! this deception of anorexia is very apparent to the rest of us, because we can see she's strarving to death, when satan deceives ones mind into believing a lie, It isn't always apparent such as sexual orientation, but I can tell you from my own experience and freedom from this deception, and I was as gay as you can get. the first step in finding freedom is believing the truth. what is the truth for the starving girl, should you except her plea's to not eat, because she believes she's fat? heck no! I would begin prayer and fasting for deliverence on her behalf. Jesus said "the truth will set you free" this is the key! for freedom from these demonic deceptions, rebuke the lie's as they enter the mind casting down false imaginations, pushing evil away. It is very much like the worst possible drug addiction, deep down you want it really bad, you crave and think about it contantly, but after more and more time goes by, and you are successful at not giving in to feed the addiction, like all addictions it goes away, I (by the grace of God) do not even think the way I used to, everything is changed. my mind isn't constantly bombarded every minute with sinful thoughts, Its my testimony that sexual deceptions are exactly like delusions suffered by anorexics, their minds are not lining up with the truth of their bodies, they can even look into a mirror and swear by God that they're fat, and you plainly see the skin hanging on bones. ITS A sATANIC DECEPTION BOTTOM LINE.......find some REAL Christians that know how to help.......there's plenty of counterfeits that are telling you to encourage his descision......love him and tell him the truth PS... my wife and I are both set free from these satanic delusions, and who the Son sets free are free indeed! there is victory in Jesus and believing the truth of His word....every word!

The real demonic deception is telling people they must change to be good enough for God when God says nothing of the sort, ever. God says He's taking care of the changes with the Holy Spirit, it is not, then, your duty to try to force that change through dogmatic denial of who someone is.

 

[talitha]

Wow, I keep checking the top of the page..... yup, this is Christian Philosophy & Ethics......

 

[Zebra1552]

I can't believe people are in here calling your son "she".

I can't believe you're telling other people what they should and should not call themselves.

Way to further degrade the man God created him to be.

Prove that this is the case. Are you God?

It's good that he is in counseling, but I don't understand why he would be in nonChristian counseling.

That's because Christian counseling is notorious for totally botching issues like this and causing more harm rather than actually helping them. Hint: It doesn't help to tell them they were born a man and that they're degrading God's image.

All of us were "born this way" - ie: with a propensity to sin - but Jesus died so that we didn't have to stay this way. As a Christian mom you should be seeking healing for your son's damaged heart, IMHO.

Please prove that being transgendered is a sin, and show that the kid's heart is actually damaged. Seeing as you're not God, I doubt you are able to do so.

 

[wannabeadesigirl]

I'm not sure we can state eunuch refered to all forms of transgenderism. Physically apparent intersex individuals may have been known, but chromosomal abnormalities, and transsexuality were not, since those all deal with DNA/brain wiring/hormones that was unknown to people back then.

True, but behavior caused by hormones was not. Intersexual mutations of the genetalia were obviously known in ancient times, so was the concept of cross dressing, and living the lifestyle of the opposite gender.
They may not have known what caused the urge to live the opposite lifestyle, but guaranteed there were individuals who were male who chose to live like women and vice versa.
There are plenty of mythological figures to suggest that sexual ambiguity, multiple genders and transsexual lifestyles were well known in ancient times.

 

[talitha]

I can't believe you're telling other people what they should and should not call themselves.

I'm not - I'm just saying I'm shocked at what they call other people's children.

Way to further degrade the man God created him to be.

Prove that this is the case. Are you God?

I would think the burden of proof would be on the ones disregarding the, um, evidence.

That's because Christian counseling is notorious for totally botching issues like this and causing more harm rather than actually helping them. Hint: It doesn't help to tell them they were born a man and that they're degrading God's image.

Depends upon how you define "help". I really don't think it's a help to encourage people to believe their delusions, even if it makes life more comfortable.

Please prove that being transgendered is a sin, and show that the kid's heart is actually damaged. Seeing as you're not God, I doubt you are able to do so.

Hmm, I don't think "being transgendered" is a sin. I don't believe it exists. Acting upon the lie and not upon the truth is aberrant, no matter what the subject is.

 

[Zebra1552]

I'm not - I'm just saying I'm shocked at what they call other people's children.

That's how he identifies himself, so who are you or we to argue?

I would think the burden of proof would be on the ones disregarding the, um, evidence.

What evidence? You haven't presented any. All you've done is try to claim that there's God-ordained gender differences that clearly establish one as a man or woman and nothing in between. I deny that such a thing exists. Since you're making the assertion, it's on you to support your affirmative claim, not on the one denying that there is any truth to your claim.

Depends upon how you define "help". I really don't think it's a help to encourage people to believe their delusions, even if it makes life more comfortable.

Please prove that it is a delusion and show that you are a psychologist and can say with certainty that all transgendered folk suffer from delusions that they should be the opposite sex, as a delusion isn't something that can be judged by anyone not an expert on the matter.

Hmm, I don't think "being transgendered" is a sin. I don't believe it exists. Acting upon the lie and not upon the truth is aberrant, no matter what the subject is.

So you deny other's reality and substitute your own. Got it.

 

[talitha]

What evidence?

The evidence on the young man's body.

Please prove that it is a delusion

If I were in front of you claiming to be Chinese, you would certainly be within your rights to say I'm deluded without presenting any medical proof.

So you deny other's reality and substitute your own. Got it.

LOL - no, some people deny the reality that they see in the shower every day.

I seriously didn't think I'd have to get all graphic here!