Too scared to return to Church!

[ZJW]

I became a born again christain when i was sixteen then turned my back on it a year or two later. I've lived a very hedonistic life throughout my twenties with a great job in London and endless rounds of glamorous parties etc. but i can't shake the feeling that something is missing and i always reminisce fondly on the time I was a practising christian and the sense of fulfilment it brought me.

I think about God and christianity an awful lot but i just can't take the step of returning to Church. I lost touch with all people from the church community over 10 years ago and I don't know any christians in my daily life any more. Despite all my best intentions I always manage to persuade myself out of going on a sunday morning but the nagging feeling of needing to return to Jesus stays with me over the years.

Soooo, any advice for a girl who is too scared to go back to Church?! I know it is what i need to do as the seed has been planted and this niggle hasn't gone away in over 10 years now but in the same respect i'm paralysed with fear about making the necessary changes in my life as it would mean turning my back on my current lifestyle, friends and probably relationship!

Words of wisdom about biting the bullet from people who've had to make similar difficult decisions would be greatly appreciated.
Or prayers that I manage to find my way back : -)

Zoe

x

 

[snoochface]

Going to church is about worshipping God. It's not about friends, and it shouldn't be about fear. In fact, it shouldn't be about you at all - maybe if you change how you are looking at it, and remember that it is supposed to be about worshipping God, the rest of the extraneous stuff won't matter as much.

Remember that Jesus said that doctors are for the sick, not the healthy. In the same way, the people who need to be at church, learning God's word, the most are the ones who are furthest from God at this point in their lives.

I can assure you that there are PLENTY of people in church who have lived worse lives than yours. I am probably one of them. I don't usually talk about my personal life on CF, but I will tell you that before I became a Christian there was plenty of sex, drugs, and partying that defined my life. That's really why going to church shouldn't be about the people you know or how you might be perceived by them - everyone has plenty of sinning in their history and none of us are any better than anyone else.

You might be more comfortable going to a new church, a smaller one that you have never been to before, where you can easily meet new people. Find one that teaches the Bible in a sound way, and go with the attitude of praising God. Make it about him, and not about you, and you will be glad you went back.

 

[ZJW]

Going to church is about worshipping God. It's not about friends, and it shouldn't be about fear. In fact, it shouldn't be about you at all - maybe if you change how you are looking at it, and remember that it is supposed to be about worshipping God, the rest of the extraneous stuff won't matter as much.

Remember that Jesus said that doctors are for the sick, not the healthy. In the same way, the people who need to be at church, learning God's word, the most are the ones who are furthest from God at this point in their lives.

I can assure you that there are PLENTY of people in church who have lived worse lives than yours. I am probably one of them. I don't usually talk about my personal life on CF, but I will tell you that before I became a Christian there was plenty of sex, drugs, and partying that defined my life. That's really why going to church shouldn't be about the people you know or how you might be perceived by them - everyone has plenty of sinning in their history and none of us are any better than anyone else.

You might be more comfortable going to a new church, a smaller one that you have never been to before, where you can easily meet new people. Find one that teaches the Bible in a sound way, and go with the attitude of praising God. Make it about him, and not about you, and you will be glad you went back.

Thank you for the advice, the fear of what other people think isn't what is stopping me returning to church and I understand that it has nothing to do with friends etc. My motivations are purely to praise Jesus and in no way am I concerned about image or how I would be perceived by friends or otherwise.

But I fear that my path has deviated from Jesus so much over the years and although i'm happy to praise him in private at home i'm fearful of rejoining a church and acknowledging all the changes I need to make in my life. It's more of an internal thing rather than fear of what other people think I was hoping for words of encouragement about rejoining a christian community when you've been absent for so long......i find i talk myself out of taking the step of going to an unknown Church each and every Sunday and persuade myself that i'm fine to keep my faith at home but i don't think my faith will grow or develop without taking the step of joining a christian community and yet i'm finding it hard to take the leap and do so

 

[Sketcher]

Well all I can tell you then is bite down and do what you know is right. It will be worth it. Your same enemy who enticed you into this lifestyle is the one who is sedating you to keep you out of church. You hear the call, the time is now. You need to make the choice and take the step. It will so worth it, that words can't do it justice. Jesus has a life for you with Him - you won't get it if you don't reach out and take it, and the way you'll be reaching out and taking it is going to church, praying, reading your Bible, getting involved with other Christians. Your soul is saved by faith, but faith is completed by following through. Jesus loves you, please take His hand!

 

[Rowan]

I became a born again christain when i was sixteen then turned my back on it a year or two later. I've lived a very hedonistic life throughout my twenties with a great job in London and endless rounds of glamorous parties etc. but i can't shake the feeling that something is missing and i always reminisce fondly on the time I was a practising christian and the sense of fulfilment it brought me.

I think about God and christianity an awful lot but i just can't take the step of returning to Church. I lost touch with all people from the church community over 10 years ago and I don't know any christians in my daily life any more. Despite all my best intentions I always manage to persuade myself out of going on a sunday morning but the nagging feeling of needing to return to Jesus stays with me over the years.

Soooo, any advice for a girl who is too scared to go back to Church?! I know it is what i need to do as the seed has been planted and this niggle hasn't gone away in over 10 years now but in the same respect i'm paralysed with fear about making the necessary changes in my life as it would mean turning my back on my current lifestyle, friends and probably relationship!

Words of wisdom about biting the bullet from people who've had to make similar difficult decisions would be greatly appreciated.
Or prayers that I manage to find my way back : -)

Zoe

x

If this is a stupid question, let me know, but you are so worried about coming back to church...have you come back to Jesus? Recieving new life in Jesus Christ is more important.

Take it from me, I was knee deep in the occult and sin. I, too, am nervous about going to church. I still haven't found one yet, and I'm listening to sermons on iTunes radio.

While you should seek a church, not going to church does not make you less of a Christian. Just stay in prayer to God. He will lead you to a congregation that will help you grow in Christ. His decision is much better than any one than we can make. Trust Jesus will flock his fruit-bearing sheep together

 

[Agape_]

Remember that the church is there to support you completly. If you have troubles and problems the church will gladly offfer its support if you so do not fear and put your trust in God for he thinks of you and wishes for you to return to him.

 

[lorali]

I am a firm beliver that God has His "chosen". And I'm also a firm beliver that "God accepts YOU" "Jesus accepts YOU" NOT "I accept God" "I accept Jesus"

How do I know if God accepts me?
He'll make you feel like "somthings missing"
You'll be having these cravings to be close to Him.
You'll start questioning "What have I become? This cant be really me!"
So I see God tugging at you.
Let go of everything else and grab that hand thats tugging you and hold it and dont ever let go.
God wont do all the work. He will meat you half way.
So are you going to grab that hand and meet Him halfway, or are you going to be a little scardiy cat and walk away, then feel bad and curl up and cry?
He has meet you half way.
Its your turn.
Good luck

 

[Controverse]

I became a born again christain when i was sixteen then turned my back on it a year or two later. I've lived a very hedonistic life throughout my twenties with a great job in London and endless rounds of glamorous parties etc. but i can't shake the feeling that something is missing and i always reminisce fondly on the time I was a practising christian and the sense of fulfilment it brought me.

I think about God and christianity an awful lot but i just can't take the step of returning to Church. I lost touch with all people from the church community over 10 years ago and I don't know any christians in my daily life any more. Despite all my best intentions I always manage to persuade myself out of going on a sunday morning but the nagging feeling of needing to return to Jesus stays with me over the years.

Soooo, any advice for a girl who is too scared to go back to Church?! I know it is what i need to do as the seed has been planted and this niggle hasn't gone away in over 10 years now but in the same respect i'm paralysed with fear about making the necessary changes in my life as it would mean turning my back on my current lifestyle, friends and probably relationship!

Words of wisdom about biting the bullet from people who've had to make similar difficult decisions would be greatly appreciated.
Or prayers that I manage to find my way back : -)

Zoe

x

Okay you have two ways about going about this:

1 - If you can somehow summon the strength to get back to church, find a church that teaches to its congregation that the Bible is the final authority.

2 - Remember that the Bible says to "fellowship", ie it's not always about church. Ask yourself, "What is church? How do you define church?"
It should be remembered that it is not compulsory to attend a church, but if you feel it would help your spiritual relationship with God, then by all means go for it. Just don't make the mistake of believing that actually going to church as much as you can is absolutely vital, because it isn't.
Depending on how you look at it, church is only a word. You really are going to church because you probably want to fellowship with other like-minded Christians and to praise the Lord alongside them. You may find it comfortable to be in this kind of crowd, in which case that is good.

On a final note: Why change your overall current lifestyle? You can still do those things such as relationships, having friends, and other such things. There is no need to turn your back on your friends. Just remember that God is important above all these things you are afraid to turn your back on, and that these things are still fine as long as you remember this.

At my high school, I am friends with like-minded Christians and we are perceived by the entire non-Christian student body as just normal people. They don't hate us for what we believe in, in fact they encourage us. There are people who are willing to accept that fact that you want to change yourself for the better, and most people I know, including everyone I know at school, recognises this simple fact. We are who we choose to be - don't let anything else change that at all.

Hope this helps.

Tac

 

[dalej42]

I'd say go back and find a church that you're comfortable in. Any reading of the Gospels will show you that Jesus spent most of his time not with the temple elders, but with sinners. You're welcome in my church and hopefully in one close to you.

 

[DawnTillery]

Pray is the best advice I can give you. Your relationship with Christ is the most important, not the building you go to. Once you redevelope that relationship with Christ, because He is standing right there waiting for you -- everything else you chose will be easier - going back to church etc.

 

[bfly]

The constant nagging is the Holy Spirit and there will come a time the nagging will stop. At that point you are lost forever. You are rejecting the Holy Spirit and that is the one sin God warns us of. At that time your conscious will be so numbed to the wooing of the Holy Spirit and you will not be bothered any more. The only way a person come to God is by the working of the Holy Spirit.

No one know when that time will come. You have been given 10 years. Do you want to gamble on being seperated from God for eternity.

You can't have it both ways. One choice will cause you to loose everything, the other choice will cause you to gain everything.

I think you will find many good christian people are living good productive lives. Have many good friends and great fellowship.

If you turn your life back over to God, you won't have to give up anything.

The God in you will make those choices for you.

I will be glad to help you anyway I can. Many others on this forum with much more knowledge than me will be glad to help you.

Don't wait too long. Don't miss the last call.

Father, your long lost child is hearing your call. Don't give up on her, she is torn between you and the world. She knows what she must do, give her the courage to take that step, impress upon her mind and heart the importance of not denying the call of the Holy Spirit. Lord put someone in her path that can be a witness of your blessings to her. In Jesus name I pray. amen

 

[christianmomof3]

I pray that the Lord will be your strength and guidance and wisdom and that He will lead you to fellowship with other Christians.

 

[Catholic Wife]

But I fear that my path has deviated from Jesus so much over the years and although i'm happy to praise him in private at home i'm fearful of rejoining a church and acknowledging all the changes I need to make in my life.

Change is scary. Changing your ways and returning to church takes a commitment that may be difficult, but it's definitly worth it!

It's more of an internal thing rather than fear of what other people think I was hoping for words of encouragement about rejoining a christian community when you've been absent for so long......

Your story sounds like the story of the prodigal son. Remember the response of the father -- welcoming the son with open arms and a big party.

 

[hlaltimus]

Since the Head Shepherd is in the forgiveness business you aught to suspect the validity of any so-called church that is unforgiving of any true penitent. As to being too scared to return to a church environment, remember that a true church is much like the sheepfold that encloses both the Shepherd and the sheep. We have far more to fear outside of that fold then we do inside of it. I have no wish to be devoured by the enemy of our souls and gratefully accept the government of that blessed, protective sheepfold and their Shepherd.

 

[airest]

My advice for you, is to pray. God will give you the guidance and strength you need and even send people to you that can help you make the step to go back to church. When I was 21 I was recently married and had a good job, new car, and just signed papers for my own condo. I had no church background but I knew God had blessed me. I kept mentioning to my husband we should go to church to thank God for all he has done but never made an effort to go to church. The more I kept mentioning it the more God reached out to me. Community churches were leaving flyers on our door. I kept noticing local churches on corners handing out material and then my husband's co-worker (we worked at the same place) started talking to him about her church. She was persistant without being annoying. I sat in on one of their conversations and then made a decision I would visit her church. She offered to pick me up and take me. I accepted Jesus Christ as my Saviour and was baptised at her church. I believe God heard my yearning and reached out to me. I pray that God will do the same for you.

 

[izeofblu1973]

I am a new practicing christian, I am not sure which denomination I am yet. I struggled with trying to hold on to my ways and still struggle with it. My best advice is to find someone to go to church with. Pray that God will enter your heart, and let Him change it. I think we are all powerless to turn away from the ways that we enjoy so much even though we know it is not the way we are supposed to live. Pray and He will fix your heart, like he is doing with mine. we are powerless to change it ourselves, turn it over to Him. Dont worry so much about trying to change yourself, He will bring you joy. I hope this helps.