To date or not to date?

[savinghopexx]

How can you tell between Gods voice vs yours? I’m trying to figure out if God wants me to date someone. I thought God was telling me to just be friends with this person but now I feel like He could be telling me to date them? I know God doesn’t go back on His word and isn’t the author of confusion but how can we know we are hearing from Him and not ourself? If I do choose to date him I don’t want it feel like I went back on Gods word and ignored him but also what if it was my voice and not God and I miss out? Any advice is welcomed.

 

[Ivan Hlavanda]

How can you tell between Gods voice vs yours? I’m trying to figure out if God wants me to date someone. I thought God was telling me to just be friends with this person but now I feel like He could be telling me to date them? I know God doesn’t go back on His word and isn’t the author of confusion but how can we know we are hearing from Him and not ourself? If I do choose to date him I don’t want it feel like I went back on Gods word and ignored him but also what if it was my voice and not God and I miss out? Any advice is welcomed.

Genesis 24 12 And he said, “O Lord, God of my master Abraham, please grant me success today and show steadfast love to my master Abraham. 13 Behold, I am standing by the spring of water, and the daughters of the men of the city are coming out to draw water. 14 Let the young woman to whom I shall say, ‘Please let down your jar that I may drink,’ and who shall say, ‘Drink, and I will water your camels’—let her be the one whom you have appointed for your servant Isaac. By this I shall know that you have shown steadfast love to my master.”

I have a prayer like this for the exact same reason, as you mentioned, so I can distinguish between my desire and God's will. One brother in Christ said God does not expect us to such things, so do think about it. But yeah, I suggest that you ask God something to happen thay you know it comes from Him.

 

[savinghopexx]

Genesis 24 12 And he said, “O Lord, God of my master Abraham, please grant me success today and show steadfast love to my master Abraham. 13 Behold, I am standing by the spring of water, and the daughters of the men of the city are coming out to draw water. 14 Let the young woman to whom I shall say, ‘Please let down your jar that I may drink,’ and who shall say, ‘Drink, and I will water your camels’—let her be the one whom you have appointed for your servant Isaac. By this I shall know that you have shown steadfast love to my master.”

I have a prayer like this for the exact same reason, as you mentioned, so I can distinguish between my desire and God's will. One brother in Christ said God does not expect us to such things, so do think about it. But yeah, I suggest that you ask God something to happen thay you know it comes from Him.

Thank you. I’m just so scared of going against Gods will and following my own. Please keep me in your prayers.

 

[Richard T]

My simple formula for God's will in any dating relationship is that the relationship brings both people closer to God. When it brings you away from God then you are on shaky ground. As to who you date, God gives some free will in that. You can always too choose not to marry or date anyone as well. If you are equally yoked, compatible and great friends then the marriage is likely to be good. God can give warnings about some people and in that case please do stay away, but if he is not saying no, then it seems fair to try at a speed that is under control. Just keep your discernment on and walk in the Lord. Trust in God for your mate, and not in any single person is always better too.

 

[TheLastGeek]

How can you tell between Gods voice vs yours? I’m trying to figure out if God wants me to date someone. I thought God was telling me to just be friends with this person but now I feel like He could be telling me to date them? I know God doesn’t go back on His word and isn’t the author of confusion but how can we know we are hearing from Him and not ourself? If I do choose to date him I don’t want it feel like I went back on Gods word and ignored him but also what if it was my voice and not God and I miss out? Any advice is welcomed.

God doesn't tell you to date people. He may have people cross your path in life, but the relationships you form with them are entirely your choice and your responsibility.

 

[bèlla]

The real question you should be asking is why He would be instructing you in this manner in light of the word. There's a consistent pattern of choice throughout the bible and few instances where couples were brought together. When it occurs it's usually for a holy work.

Derek Prince shared his experiences in his book God is a Matchmaker and holds true to the same. His first wife helped him launch his ministry and when she died the second helped him expand it. If you haven't discovered your purpose it will be difficult to discern if you're correct or making assumptions. If the Lord arranges the pairing it's for a reason and personal happiness isn't the primary motivation. It's the kingdom.

I know my calling and when I engaged with suitors in the past He provided input. But I've spent years praying and fasting for my marriage and future spouse strategically. Not only for his welfare but offensively too. When you stand in the gap for another you'll get feedback. Especially when you have authority in that respect.

I wasn't focused on romance, having a companion or tying the knot. I wanted my covering and co-laborer for the work He's assigned to us both. That was my motivation. There was point when I was told to rekindle a previous connection and given the reasons why. He was a natural fit for me personally and professionally and supported my calling wholeheartedly and possessed the skills and experience I lacked.

When we reconnected the first thing he asked is what are you doing for tzedakah. It's a charitable act commonly associated with Rosh HaShanah. A holy day in the jewish calendar. The first conversation we had was about the Lord.

~bella