Hello, my name is Karen and my husband died to suicide 2 years ago and I found healing through writing. I have twin daughters and through a therapist we have found these tips have helped our family in the past two years. I hope they help your family. It was published recently in Yahoo Voices.
1. See a therapist. First, take them to a counselor, therapist or child psychologist so that a grief management plan can be in place. Also, join a grief support group.
2. Make a Shirt Square. Your child can find a favorite shirt of their parent, cut a small square out of the back of it with child-safety scissors, and take it to school in their backpack.
3. T-Shirt for Nighttime. Encourage your child to go through their parent's clothes, to pick a favorite shirt of their loved one and then let them sleep with it.
4. Journals to Mommy/Daddy. At a craft store, have your child pick out a nice journal and an acid-free pen, and then write to their loved one.
5. New Traditions. Your family can make new traditions at the holidays. If their parent enjoyed snow globes buy a new one every year for Christmas.
6. Plant a tree. Your child may enjoy planting a tree in honor of their mommy/daddy.
7. Photo Albums. Maybe your child would like to create their own photo album with the photos you have collected through the years.
8. Their Own Scrapbook. It is a lovely idea for each child to make a scrapbook of their own about their loved one with inserted photos, drawings, paintings, and favorite memories recorded on card stock.
9. Your Own Scrapbook. Make a scrapbook about your spouse as a gift to your child.
10. Treasure Box. You and your child might like to make a treasure box to keep special things of their parent's.
11. Framed Pictures. Work with your child to create framed pictures of their mommy/daddy at their nightstand. Even a picture of you and your spouse on your wedding day can be comforting to your child.
12. Framed Picture of Mommy/Daddy's Hand. Have a glove or mitten of their parent? Your child can use it to make an outline of their parent's hand, then you can frame and hang it on the wall next to your child's bed so they can "high-five" it before bed.
13. Keep Contact with Teacher and School Counselor. Talk to your school's counselor and your child's teacher and have an action plan in place in the event of bullying or sad days. Coordinate communication between the school counselor and your child's therapist.
14. Make CD of Mommy/Daddy's Favorite Music. Encourage your child to make a CD of their loved one's favorite music.
15. Love Notes in Balloons. Support your child in writing love notes to put in a balloon to send off to heaven at the cemetery.
16. Read Books at Grave. Perhaps you child would find it comforting to read a book to mommy/daddy at the grave.
17. Place Flowers and Clean Grave. Your child may like to place flowers at the grave and clean it regularly.
18. Write Cards. Your child may want to write cards and leave them at the grave. (You might want to secretly collect them later).
19. Extracurricular Activities. Inspire your child to get involved in extracurricular activities such as ballet, theater or karate as a way to express their bodies and emotions.
20. Do Free Activities to Uplift Moods. On "sad" days, visit your local library or park (free!) to make it a happy day!
21. Puppets. Your child can make and use handmade puppets resembling their mommy/daddy and perform a puppet play about their parent's life or death.
22. Physical Exercise. Your child may want to join a gym, Boys/Girls Club or an athletic team at school. Daily physical exercise is good for serotonin levels and works as a natural anti-depressant.
23. Write Songs. Encourage your child to write a song about their mommy/daddy and perform it for you or their therapist.
24. Mailboxes. You and your child can set up a mailbox system to exchange mail together at home to express their feelings in a non-threatening way.
25. Go Through Parent's Clothes and Possessions. Your child may like to go through their parent's shirts and other possessions to open up a dialogue with them about their memories.
1. See a therapist. First, take them to a counselor, therapist or child psychologist so that a grief management plan can be in place. Also, join a grief support group.
2. Make a Shirt Square. Your child can find a favorite shirt of their parent, cut a small square out of the back of it with child-safety scissors, and take it to school in their backpack.
3. T-Shirt for Nighttime. Encourage your child to go through their parent's clothes, to pick a favorite shirt of their loved one and then let them sleep with it.
4. Journals to Mommy/Daddy. At a craft store, have your child pick out a nice journal and an acid-free pen, and then write to their loved one.
5. New Traditions. Your family can make new traditions at the holidays. If their parent enjoyed snow globes buy a new one every year for Christmas.
6. Plant a tree. Your child may enjoy planting a tree in honor of their mommy/daddy.
7. Photo Albums. Maybe your child would like to create their own photo album with the photos you have collected through the years.
8. Their Own Scrapbook. It is a lovely idea for each child to make a scrapbook of their own about their loved one with inserted photos, drawings, paintings, and favorite memories recorded on card stock.
9. Your Own Scrapbook. Make a scrapbook about your spouse as a gift to your child.
10. Treasure Box. You and your child might like to make a treasure box to keep special things of their parent's.
11. Framed Pictures. Work with your child to create framed pictures of their mommy/daddy at their nightstand. Even a picture of you and your spouse on your wedding day can be comforting to your child.
12. Framed Picture of Mommy/Daddy's Hand. Have a glove or mitten of their parent? Your child can use it to make an outline of their parent's hand, then you can frame and hang it on the wall next to your child's bed so they can "high-five" it before bed.
13. Keep Contact with Teacher and School Counselor. Talk to your school's counselor and your child's teacher and have an action plan in place in the event of bullying or sad days. Coordinate communication between the school counselor and your child's therapist.
14. Make CD of Mommy/Daddy's Favorite Music. Encourage your child to make a CD of their loved one's favorite music.
15. Love Notes in Balloons. Support your child in writing love notes to put in a balloon to send off to heaven at the cemetery.
16. Read Books at Grave. Perhaps you child would find it comforting to read a book to mommy/daddy at the grave.
17. Place Flowers and Clean Grave. Your child may like to place flowers at the grave and clean it regularly.
18. Write Cards. Your child may want to write cards and leave them at the grave. (You might want to secretly collect them later).
19. Extracurricular Activities. Inspire your child to get involved in extracurricular activities such as ballet, theater or karate as a way to express their bodies and emotions.
20. Do Free Activities to Uplift Moods. On "sad" days, visit your local library or park (free!) to make it a happy day!
21. Puppets. Your child can make and use handmade puppets resembling their mommy/daddy and perform a puppet play about their parent's life or death.
22. Physical Exercise. Your child may want to join a gym, Boys/Girls Club or an athletic team at school. Daily physical exercise is good for serotonin levels and works as a natural anti-depressant.
23. Write Songs. Encourage your child to write a song about their mommy/daddy and perform it for you or their therapist.
24. Mailboxes. You and your child can set up a mailbox system to exchange mail together at home to express their feelings in a non-threatening way.
25. Go Through Parent's Clothes and Possessions. Your child may like to go through their parent's shirts and other possessions to open up a dialogue with them about their memories.
