Kaibeto said:
I was mocked by other christians, talked about behind my back by other christians and when I need help the people I thought I knew passed me by . . .
Hmmmm....unfortunately not uncommon. As a protestant myself and whose parents left their church over what you experienced let me cast a few stones at my fellow protestants on this. Catholics do not have this problem as much. Not as many cliques. The poorest Catholic, illiterate, the owner of one pair of shoes can walk into St. Peter's and consider it his church. We protestants all too many times do tend to make a point of attending the
right church, having the
right circle of friends, having the
right schooling and connections. And not paying attention to or even putting down those who do not.
Material suffering is easy to see. Those distressed inside are not so obvious. Sometimes their pain manifests itself in ways which make us uncomfortable. Easy to hang with those not in distress.
A Jewish friend of mine was an evangelical Christian for five years. It was a profound religious experience for her. She was charitable to the point her own finances suffered. When she had a serious illness, her finances tanked. And her circle of friends (which was a small Christian group and, I hope, not representative of many of us) did not support her. So she left. But she missed it. She so loved Christ...so much wanted the experiece of walking with God. Hanukkah at her house was like a wake. She was so sad.
The moral of this I guess is the problem was not you, is not the faith but is the failings of some in the faith. We all need to do better.
All I can suggest is to concentrate on the Holy and try to put aside the mundane, flawed trappings of the Faith. This is best not done alone. It it worth it to find that one person who will direct you toward the Holy and not to his or her thoughts about the Holy or to a shallow transitory experiental relationship with the Holy.
