thinking about it all the time

[texannurse]

Hi everyone! I have a question. I spend some time each day thinking about cutting - not doing it, just thinking about it. i don't want the thoughts - they are just there. It gets pretty frustrating because I don't know how I'll ever stop if I keep thinking about it. I wish I could turn off the thoughts sometimes. Distraction is a great tool, though.
Anyone else ever feel like this? Is this totally abnormal?

 

[Daysoni]

Not doing it is a huge step. When were healing I beleave it's the action that leaves first. The thoughts are something that with time will leave or come not as often..

 

[Restoredsoul]

it is normal to think about it still... you need to try an occupy your mind with other things - i used to actually phne my friends and tell them so they would talk to me. i used to go for walks, write down how i was feeling then rip it up.

I love singing so i used to sing really loudly!

try to find things that help you to keep your mind of it

Much love
RS xx

 

[IKTCA]

TexanNurse,
My mind is inside me. But sometimes it gets thoughts that I don't want to have.

When I tell my arm to pick up a fruit, it does. When I tell my mind not to have certain thoughts, sometimes it continues to have the thoughts.

I find a principle. My mind, though inside me, is not quite mine. When I lost my job, my mind worried. I didn't want to. I told my mind not to worry. But it was of no use. My mind continued to worry.

I summarize your statement as this:
I want to be the master of my mind, but I cannot.

Neither can I. All say their mind is theirs. But none truly own their mind.

What do you think, TexanNurse?

Rupert

 

[TheMainException]

Well..saying "totally abnormal" is a bit harsh...but it shouldn't be...I'll say that. I've had the same prob for a while...I used to just think and think and think about it...focusing on it and even holding a knife a few times...at one time, i even liked it, to think about it...that was before I thought there was something wrong with me. I got help for it after confiding in a friend of mine (an older guy who worked at a mental health facility and once a youth pastor, now 36) and he said that it wasn't right, and that it wasn't healthy. I think you need to talk to someone who can work with you.

 

[texannurse]

Rupert - I see what you mean. I used to think it was a matter of willpower - that if I just told myself not to think about it then I wouldn't think about it. But that just seems to make it worse. I've been giving this subject much thought and it seems that the best way is to fight fire with fire. By that I mean, when the thoughts come, to just say to myself "yes, I would love to cut right now, but I am working hard on recovery and I choose to not do it." I guess the more I say that to myself, hopefully the easier it will be and maybe someday that thought will replace the old thought ( I mean - "I have to cut"). What do you think about that - sound logical? Pray for me as I do for everyone else.
In Him,
texannurse

 

[IKTCA]

Like you, I come to a logical conclusion: I cannot be the master of my mind. And I make a decision to give my mind to Jesus and serve him as my master. He will fill my mind with worthy thoughts. As my mind becomes filled with them, unworthy thoughts will find no place and have to leave.

Decision, in my case, was to serve Jesus as my master. I am no longer the master of my mind and body. And my master's will is recorded in the Bible, and I make efforts to know his will by reading the book.

My peace I give to you. (John 14:27)

A mind unsubmitted to Jesus is harassed by the devil. I had no rest before I served Master Jesus. Now I have rest and peace.

Rupert

 

[devotee]

Hi everyone! I have a question. I spend some time each day thinking about cutting - not doing it, just thinking about it. i don't want the thoughts - they are just there. It gets pretty frustrating because I don't know how I'll ever stop if I keep thinking about it. I wish I could turn off the thoughts sometimes. Distraction is a great tool, though.
Anyone else ever feel like this? Is this totally abnormal?

I used to express my feelings thorugh my body. It gave me a way to visualise and make tangible what I was thinking, it helped to release the pain. I got to know my "triggers" the things that set these thoughts on. I studied psychology, especially cognition, and learnt that I could re-wire my thought patterns in a systematic way. I study spiritual philosophies to focus on what is really important in life - compassion, serving, non-judgement. I discovered stategies that worked for me: I go outside immediately (air, sun,rain, beach, trees you get the idea), I watch international documentaries to see how I can contribute to the world through awareness and service, I wirte, draw and create. I have not injured myself for a very long time, and know that I will not in the future. I have alternatives...hope this helps.

 

[TheMainException]

A mind unsubmitted to Jesus is harassed by the devil. I had no rest before I served Master Jesus. Now I have rest and peace.

Rupert

My brother! My brother!!! I beg of you not to make such a mistake as this to think satan so low! The closer you get to Jesus, the more you will be attacked...but the easier it will get to handle. We will always be attacked by Satan, it's never ending, but with Jesus, things do get easier. Sometimes Jesus will take over and allow us to rest, but we will always be attacked and harassed by Satan...he loves to hurt us and always will.

 

[IKTCA]

LAWise,

I find you have much wisdom, not just in this post but in other posts as well. You have a keen and analytical mind. I am certain you will be of much help to your sisters in the future.

How true it is that Satan always tempts us until we take our last breath.

As we first start walking in the Lord, anger (which is unforgiveness) and lies disappear from our heart. The Lord sets us free from these basic flesh sins. We will be tempted with different forms of bitterness and untruth, but not outright anger and lies. Likewise, cutting disappears as we grow in the word of God. We will be set free from this elemental form of bad habit. The guilt and shame of cutting will be far from us as east is far from west. We will find rest and peace, and thanksgiving will flow from our heart. Some have already tasted the freedom as can be read in some posts.

If anger, despair, worries, lies, cutting and bad habits leave me, and my heart is filled with thanksgiving, can I not call it peace and rest? Temptations come, but peace and rest prevail as far as we are in the Lord. Occasionally a believer may fall to temptations. But only occasionally. Only then, we lost peace and rest. Temptations do not rob peace and rest. Only when we fall to temptations.

Rupert

 

[Im-revived]

Whilst reading your thread, it actually came to mind that as well as having the problem youve mentioned you may also be suffering symptoms also related to OCD, although your not responding to your thoughts, they do seem to be obsessive thoughts, that happen many times daily. Something for you to think about anyway, but it isn't abnormal to suffer both issues, I have many clients with both problems.

Im-revived (BAMH)

Hi everyone! I have a question. I spend some time each day thinking about cutting - not doing it, just thinking about it. i don't want the thoughts - they are just there. It gets pretty frustrating because I don't know how I'll ever stop if I keep thinking about it. I wish I could turn off the thoughts sometimes. Distraction is a great tool, though.
Anyone else ever feel like this? Is this totally abnormal?

 

[Kahalachan]

Hi everyone! I have a question. I spend some time each day thinking about cutting - not doing it, just thinking about it. i don't want the thoughts - they are just there. It gets pretty frustrating because I don't know how I'll ever stop if I keep thinking about it. I wish I could turn off the thoughts sometimes. Distraction is a great tool, though.
Anyone else ever feel like this? Is this totally abnormal?

It is completely normal to think about it because you want to stop thinking about it. It's psychologically supported that when we try to avoid thoughts they pop up.

If you try to think of the direct opposite of something, a lot of times the thing itself is retreived.

The best advice is a distraction, and not thinking "I need to stop thinking about SI" If SI pops in your head, don't get too worried about it and think you need to avoid it. Simply distract your thoughts.

 

[texannurse]

I have never been diagnosed as OCD; depression, anxiety and general mood disorder - but never OCD. I must admit that "label" scares me. And no, that does not really cause me any extra anxiety, just a new thought. My biggest concern is how to stop the thoughts of SI. So far it's been a month and 3 days since I last cut! And actually, each day the thoughts get less and less. That is something to be grateful for. And maybe the thoughts will never go away. I don't mind as long as i can learn to control them in some way. ANy suggestions??

 

[Im-revived]

Hi, OCD is nothing to be scared of honestly, as youve been doing so well recently and your thoughts are reducing, thats excellant. I mentioned OCD as many think its something just to do with checking things etc, but in actual fact OCD can also be brought on by many months or years of doing or thinking the same. A bit like a habit, thats got out of control. Very much like someone smoking cigarrettes for a week, then not being able to stop, so it becomes habit forming. Although it started with thoughts of self harm for you, as times gone on its a regular way of you trying to feel more in control. This then leads to OCD, also like many you don't like labels, and like I try to tell all clients, a label is something others see. All mental health issues are the same as having a sore throat in a way, you can't see it Love. No-one would turn round in the street and call you a sore throat would they. Labels are on jars and cans, not written on your body. Letters are just shortened words for an illness.

Im-revived

I have never been diagnosed as OCD; depression, anxiety and general mood disorder - but never OCD. I must admit that "label" scares me. And no, that does not really cause me any extra anxiety, just a new thought. My biggest concern is how to stop the thoughts of SI. So far it's been a month and 3 days since I last cut! And actually, each day the thoughts get less and less. That is something to be grateful for. And maybe the thoughts will never go away. I don't mind as long as i can learn to control them in some way. ANy suggestions??

 

[Kahalachan]

I have never been diagnosed as OCD; depression, anxiety and general mood disorder - but never OCD. I must admit that "label" scares me. And no, that does not really cause me any extra anxiety, just a new thought. My biggest concern is how to stop the thoughts of SI. So far it's been a month and 3 days since I last cut! And actually, each day the thoughts get less and less. That is something to be grateful for. And maybe the thoughts will never go away. I don't mind as long as i can learn to control them in some way. ANy suggestions??

I wouldn't worry about having OCD yet. These thoughts would have to basically plague you and persist constantly.

Here is the diagnostic criteria for OCD with the definition of Obsessions.

Obsessions as defined by (1), (2), (3), and (4):

1. recurrent and persistent thoughts, impulses, or images that are experienced, at some time during the disturbance, as intrusive and inappropriate and that cause marked anxiety or distress
2. the thoughts, impulses, or images are not simply excessive worries about real-life problems
3. the person attempts to ignore or suppress such thoughts, impulses, or images, or to neutralize them with some other thought or action
4. the person recognizes that the obsessional thoughts, impulses, or images are a product of his or her own mind (not imposed from without as in thought insertion)

B. At some point during the course of the disorder, the person has recognized that the obsessions or compulsions are excessive or unreasonable. Note: This does not apply to children.

C. The obsessions or compulsions cause marked distress, are time consuming (take more than 1 hour a day), or significantly interfere with the person’s normal routine, occupational (or academic) functioning, or usual social activities or relationships.


D. If another Axis I disorder is present, the content of the obsessions or compulsions is not restricted to it (e.g, preoccupation with food in the presence of an Eating Disorder

E. The disturbance is not due to the direct physiological effects of a substance (e.g., a drug of abuse, a medication) or a general medical condition.


It may be true that the thoughts never go away. When you artificially introduce an addiction that is so strong it felt like a necessity of life, then thoughts of it will probably persist. But since it is gradually reducing I would be happy about that, cause that is also normal and will continue.

But what is important is to know that what was once an addiction is not a necessity of life. If the thought pops up, does the desire pop up? Or is it merely a thought?

The best thing to do is simply and non-chalantly focus your attention elsewhere. Realize that SI won't help in anyway and is just a thought and not an action that should be taken.