The right and moral thing to do?

[Myah]

Thanks God'sgal!

Doesn't anyone here listen to Dr. Laura??

I do... My father gave me "10 Stupid Things Women Do to Mess Up Their Lives" when I was younger. It really made me think. I still have it. While I don't agree with everything Doctor Laura says, I do think that she is a very intelligent woman who gives good advice. My sister has even spoken to her and she helped my sister a great deal.

 

[HappyMomof4]

I would call her and tell her. Put yourself in her place. That's a mean trick to play.

 

[Duchess Dines Out]

I agree that it's a mean trick, but put yourself in the husbands place.

Imagine... You have a problem and you come up with a way to deal with it... Maybe it isn't a very nice way, but it's what you've decided to do. You tell your husband, who you are supposed to trust and be able to tell anything to. Maybe he says that it isn't so nice and you shouldn't do it... Maybe he outright says your wrong. Maybe you even fight about it. But either way, you don't change your mind.

Now, what your going to do isn't so nice and you probably shouldn't do it... But if your husband went behind your back, he'd be in the dog house. That's the way it is...

I was on the other end of this situation a while back. My mom started getting involved with a dangerous man and I feared for her safety. As a result, I decided to do something that was illegal, so I'm not gonna tell. In either case, my husband didn't see my side and he totally disagreed. Whether or not I decided to do it isn't the point... The point is, my husband is my confidante so I told him something. He didn't like it, but if he had gone to my mother about it, it would have done serious damage to mine and my husbands relationship. I should be able to trust him, and I can. Your husband should be able to trust you... it's not a question of if he's right or wrong, it's a question of whether you are willing to put your relationship on the line for it. If you are, there is more going on here than him trying to trick a clerk at the store and you should probably be talking to someone about your marraige, not his business affairs.

 

[seebs]

I listen do Dr. Laura for comic relief. I would never take her advice as any kind of moral guidance or guide to Christian values.

 

[The Bellman]

I think Duchess has a point in that you should be dealing with your hubby, going to the girl yourself isn't really your place. But if he refuses then tell him point blank you think he's doing the wrong thing, and if she decides to take legal action you won't lie about it. If he still decides to do it, your hands are clean and it is HIS choice to make that mistake. You can't mess with free will, not even God himself will touch that one. But if the legal issues come up, you are bound by a moral obligation to tell the truth. That's not just being a good Christian, it's just the right thing to do. There is telling someone something in confidence, and then there is standing in the way of justice, which you will be doing if you are called to testify and you contempt yourself or purger yourself.

If he still decides to do it her hands are not clean; she is as guilty as he is. If he was planning to beat her up, or kill her, and she just told him he shouldn't, but let it happen (rather than warning her) when he persisted, would her hands be clean?

 

[Jennifer615]

Problem solved. The girl put in her letter of resignation yesterday, so they didn't get time to play the trick on her. Apparently she got one of the jobs she applied for. I must admit, this is a relief! Thanks again everyone for your advice.
Jennifer