The right and moral thing to do?

[Jennifer615]

What should I do? My husband works for a small car hire company. He employs a casual sales girl. My husband knows that she has been applying for other jobs in work time.

He and the director are planning a revenge trick on her. They are going to send her an email, making it look like it is from one of the jobs she applied for, asking her to start tomorrow. Of course, she will resign and turn up the next day, and there will be no job?

I feel like phoning her and telling her, as I think it is a rotten trick to play on her. As a Christian, what should I do? Should I submit to my husband, even though he is in the wrong or tell her and go with my conscience. Would appreciate feedback. Thanks.

 

[Prince Lucianus]

Phone her up.

She should play along with them, and then play a trick on them tomorrow.
Make them feel at least a little guilty.

Lucy

 

[spikenard]

I would probably stay out of it if you do not know this person. I would pray for God's will to be done. This is safe because joining the strangers side could hurt your marriage if He finds out. God could be punishing this girl for something or who knows what, but prayer can do more for you in a tough situation than a quick unthought plan of action. I wish I could be of more help. May God lead you through this struggle.

 

[Fuzzy]

I really can't give you a Christian perspective, just that of someone
who's been in a similar position to the girl and your husband.

1. How did you find out? Did your husband directly tell you what was going on,
and how he was going to play this joke? Or did you overhear it?

2. Has anyone found out why she's leaving? I had a similar situation years ago
(having to end one job and switch to another in less than a week), I told my bosses
I was leaving, and they tried to work with me to get me to stay. Is there anything
your husband and the director can do to get her to stay? Is she looking for a new job
because of school requirements? Money? Wants something more in line with her
goal in life? Is she a good employee? Has she been honest about any time she
takes off (if any) for job hunting? Are they willing to let her come back after the joke?
Is this really a "joke," or a way to get her to leave the company wihtout them having
to be "bad" guys? I don't know how it is where you are, but Texas is a "right to
work" state, wherein anyone can apply for a job, and the employer can fire anyone
at any time.

3. Emails can be tricky things to use for jokes. Not everyone knows how to look
at the headers to establish the delivery path, so she may very well think it's a
legitimate message. Is them sending the email saying she got the new job any
better than spammers telling you you've been chosen to participate in some
money laundering scheme? Are your husband and the director exploiting her
ignorance for their own amusement?

You ask if warning her is morally correct since it would be defying your husband.
Is it morally correct to condone him engaging in (potential) cruelty or trickery?
I'd say tell ask your husband to reconsider, since such a joke could have far
reaching consequences.

 

[Murmur]

Phone her up.

She should play along with them, and then play a trick on them tomorrow.
Make them feel at least a little guilty.

Lucy

I agree whole-heartedly.

 

[an7222]

If I were you I would advice your husband that to do that is moraly wrong, but I'd never go there and tell her the truth.

 

[Buzz Dixon]

Your husband and his partner are begging for a lawsuit. Even if the sales girl has no chance of winning it, it'll cost both of them (and you!) money either defending it or paying her off out of court. My recommendation is to call your husband and put a screeching halt to this ASAP.

If they resent the girl looking for work on company time and they want to fire her, they must be above board about it and tell her that's the reason she is being dismissed. Any trickery on their part and they'll be lucky if it's just a private attorney they have to deal with and not a union or a federal agency.

 

[Johnnz]

Your husband's behaviour would not even register of the "love your neighbour as yourself" scale - remembering that, after loving God, this is the next greatest commandment

John
NZ

 

[hyperborean]

What should I do? My husband works for a small car hire company. He employs a casual sales girl. My husband knows that she has been applying for other jobs in work time.

He and the director are planning a revenge trick on her. They are going to send her an email, making it look like it is from one of the jobs she applied for, asking her to start tomorrow. Of course, she will resign and turn up the next day, and there will be no job?

I feel like phoning her and telling her, as I think it is a rotten trick to play on her. As a Christian, what should I do? Should I submit to my husband, even though he is in the wrong or tell her and go with my conscience. Would appreciate feedback. Thanks.

First tell your husband how you feel. That is a mean,vindictive un-christian thing to do. Only atheists are supposed to do stuff like that! I would be more concerned with what kind of man you married. Yes, you should phone her, but still have a talk with your husband because that is simply illogical and wrong.

 

[Seeking...]

Tell your husband that his childish behavior is causing you to lose respect for him. Tell him that if he will not give you his word that he will give this plan up, then you will have to inform the woman of the goings-on.

If her behavior is violating company policy then they should let her go. Playing with her head is just as unprofessional as anything this young lady is doing.

 

[seebs]

I would tell him not to do it. If he does it anyway, I would warn the girl.

The words for the way your husband is behaving are prohibited by the censor filter.

 

[Jennifer615]

Just a quick note to say thanks to everyone who responded.

Well, I told my husband how I feel. He got quite angry, saying what they do at their work is none of my business, to stop mithering him about it, and that it probably won't happen anyway, and that what the director (owner) decides to do at work has nothing to do with him. However, the director is hopeless with computers and he would need my husband to set up the email so it looks like it came from a place of employment she applied to.

I don't know the girl that well, but we are on friendly terms, as I go into his office every Monday to get a lift home from work. I get the impression that she is a nice girl, who does her work, but isn't the most hard-working person they ever had. At the same time, they pay her a low wage, and have employed her on a full-time casual basis, which means she doesn't get paid for sick leave or holidays, and they can sack her anytime they want. She has however been with them for about 6 months and is often left in charge of the office by herself when my husband and the director are on business trips. She may not be brilliant, but I think she is good at her job.

As I said to my husband, sack her if he wants, or give her a warning, but please don't do this horrible thing to her! Someone mentioned that if I told her about their trick, she might get lawyers ready, and I may have to testify against my husband, which as Christian I just cannot do. I am not going to tell her, but I think I will send my husband an email today explaining exactly how I feel and how this could be dangerous if she decides to sue.

Thanks again everyone. Jennifer

 

[seebs]

Er, why couldn't you testify against your husband? If he has done a wrong thing, justice demands that the truth come out, for better or worse. Your duty to your husband means you have to hold him responsible, and remind him of his moral duties; not that you should support him in sin.

 

[The Bellman]

I may have to testify against my husband, which as Christian I just cannot do.

Why not? I thought Christians were supposed to tell the truth?

 

[Duchess Dines Out]

Your husband should be able to tell you something in confidance without worrying about what you'll do behind his back.

 

[The Bellman]

As a christian, you should tell the truth, if asked. But, why would you tell on your husband. Your loyalties should lie with him, not her.

Shouldn't her loyalties lie with the truth? Or with what is right?

Even though what he's doing isn't right, it's not illegal. It wouldn't be in your best interest for your marraige to come apart as a result of this. His being able to tell you something in confidance without worrying about what you'll do behind his back is an important thing.

I believe that we - all of us - have a responsibility to every other person on the planet to ensure, as far as we can, that they are treated morally. If a person is treating them (or planning to treat them) immorally, then we have a responsibility to either redress or prevent that treatment. For the OPer to NOT act to prevent this injustice would, IMO, make her as immoral as her husband in perpetrating this injustice.

If her husband were planning an illegal act - say, having the woman beaten up - would you counsel that she should not act to prevent it? If not (and I think you would answer no to the above question) then what's the difference? The legality of the act? Laws change. The illegality of an act does not change its morality.

 

[seebs]

Your husband should be able to tell you something in confidance without worrying about what you'll do behind his back.

Sure, and the girl should be able to assume that people aren't lying to her.

You waive a lot of your rights when you do something willfully malicious.

 

[Duchess Dines Out]

The girl also has the right to go to work and do her job. She should be looking for a new job in her free time.

Clearly, you are misunderstanding me. I don't think what he's doing is right and I would have a lot to say about it if it was my husband, trust me... But I'd say it to him. Whether you like what he has to say or not your husband should be able to trust you. He should know that if he says something to you, even if you disagree, you are not going to go behind his back. Say it to him, then let the grown man make his own decisions.

 

[God'sgal]

I think Duchess has a point in that you should be dealing with your hubby, going to the girl yourself isn't really your place. But if he refuses then tell him point blank you think he's doing the wrong thing, and if she decides to take legal action you won't lie about it. If he still decides to do it, your hands are clean and it is HIS choice to make that mistake. You can't mess with free will, not even God himself will touch that one. But if the legal issues come up, you are bound by a moral obligation to tell the truth. That's not just being a good Christian, it's just the right thing to do. There is telling someone something in confidence, and then there is standing in the way of justice, which you will be doing if you are called to testify and you contempt yourself or purger yourself.

 

[Duchess Dines Out]

Thanks God'sgal!

Doesn't anyone here listen to Dr. Laura??