The Golden Rule

[rickster]

I hope this is the right forum for this question.

Someone recently said to me

"Here's a neat little mental trick: Love thy neighbor as thyself. That has two parts, but you're overdoing the first and underdoing the second in the name of convincing yourself, and the rest of the world, that you're morally superior. It's a natural, self-protective instinct, that allows you to avoid examining your own flawed, dangerous, perhaps even immoral true animal self, and leaves you the simple out of denying it."

Say I was overly nice to someone to the point where it caused me great pain, emotional pain. I would want to be treated the same way but I don't want the other person to inflict the same amount of pain on him/her. Thus I would not be following the golden rule. I hope that made some sense.

Basically I can't think of a way to refute that quoted statement, and I need your help into justifying my masochistic ways while still following the Bible.

 

[Phoebe]

Are you asking if we should love someone else to the point it damages us?

Being too nice to someone can do more harm than good. For them and yourself.
A parent that does everything for their child will end up cripling their child. That child becomes so dependant on the parent, that they can make no decisions for themselves. What becomes of the child when the parent dies?

 

[rickster]

I was thinking more along the lines of a person using/abusing you.

This story happened to me.

This girl and I spent a lot of time together during the summer. We both liked working out and exercising so we decided to go to the gym. I took her to the gym everyday where we did our routine workouts. Over the course of the summer I found out that there is more to this girl than meets the eye. I found out she is very moody, up to the point where she is taking Zoloft to combat her depression. I figured that she likes to go to the gym because it boosts her self-esteem, and she seems more joyful when we are working out. I later found out she wanted to "get with" my cousin behind my back. I wouldn't really care, except for the fact that she said she didn't want to have any sort of relationship this summer because she is going away to college when summer is up. So she lied to me. To make matters worse she never wanted to get to know me. I was holding up the conversations up all by my own asking her questions and putting in my 2 cents here and there. Very few times did she seem interested in getting to know me. Sometimes the rides home were very quiet, since she wasn’t very talkative. Now what totally ticked me off is when I asked her to do other things with me besides the gym. I asked her on five separate occasions to have lunch with me or go to the movies or the beach. Each time she flaked out. So I flat out asked her if I was really her friend and she said yes. I kept telling her that she shouldn’t treat her friends the way she treated me. Though a couple of the times I didn’t word it that nicely and we got in a few verbal fights. We apologized to each other each time, but of course I had to start apologizing first. Even with all that commotion going on I still took her to the gym. I dreaded taking her to the gym because she is an evil person, but I knew that she needed the gym as an outlet to relieve stress and to become less depressed. It pained me to take her to the gym because I couldn’t get her to change her wicked/deceitful ways. I saw good in her heart but I couldn’t get it to break through.

With that said, I guess there is a fine line between helping someone out and hurting oneself in the process. Be true to yourself and don’t hurt yourself when you know what you are trying to do is hopeless. I thought I could help this girl be a better person because I saw some good in her heart; sometimes its hard to know when to stop though. It’s hard to tell when somebody doesn’t really want your help.

Anyways, does anyone have a better way to refute that quoted statement in my first post?

 

[SAVEVERYONE]

There will be know need to try to help someone if your flowing in your anointing, your able to do what you do with ease if your in your anointing. From the overflow with your relationship with Jesus will it come from, for when your in his presence fellowshipping and talking with him throughout the day, his presence will touch her, instead of you trying to touch her. Lots of Love

 

[Light Keeper]

Greetings Rickster.
The secular/philosophy rendering of the golden rule is different to the teaching Jesus taught, the essence is the same but Jesus added some thing extra for the children of God, He added LOVE, (see Mark 19:19).
The "do" has become Love, who's love, Gods Love!
We can know Gods Love for us and then we can show that Love in our lives and by showing the same to our fellowman, explaining that ours is only a poor reflection of the Love that God has for them.
To see what love is read Corinthians 13:4 - 7
13:4 Love never gives up. Love cares more for others than for self. Love doesn't want what it doesn't have. Love doesn't strut, Doesn't have a swelled head,
13:5 Doesn't force itself on others, Isn't always "me first," Doesn't fly off the handle, Doesn't keep score of the sins of others,
13:6 Doesn't revel when others grovel, Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth,
13:7 Puts up with anything, Trusts God always, Always looks for the best, Never looks back, But keeps going to the end.
What was the reason behind your attempt to help this person, was it your love or Gods Love, this question is asked of all believers
SHALOM.