The Five Love Languages

[clairysage]

I've just received my copy of "The Five Love Languages" I ordered recently. I just had to post and say "WOW!". I haven't even finished reading it yet, and already it's like a light is turned on, and things are becoming clear!! I haven't come to a final conclusion as to what me and my hubby's love languages are but I can see that they are quite different. It seems like our problems are all to do with speaking different languages and I can see how it becomes a viscious circle - he doesn't feel I love him because I don't express love in the way he understands, so he withdraws and doesn't express his love in a way I understand so much ... so we get further apart and feel unloved and blame the other one for stopping loving us. I must get hubby to read it too - please pray that he will and won't dismiss it . Things have been much better anyway since he's been back from his travels and I can see it improving more if we follow some of the ideas in the book. It seems so obvious once you've read it, but it isn't atall until you do!

I recommend this book - if you are having difficulties in your marriage, and feel unloved, or your hubby feels unloved. Try it - you might well find it really helps!

Clairy

 

[HeatherJay]

I agree. It's truly eye opening. It's helped my hubby and I tremendously.

His language is most definitely Acts of Service...he feels loved when I keep the house clean and have dinner ready when he comes home.

My language is Physical Touch...I feel he loves me when he hugs and kisses me and holds my hand...and of course all the other types of physical touch. *winkwink*

LOL...anyway, yes, it's a wonderful book and ministers should hand it to newlywed couples on their way out of the church doors! Hehe...well...they should!

Love, Heather

 

[cjba]

You and your hubby will be in my prayers. I pray that he will devote this time with you to work on the areas of your marriage that are needed. May he have an open heart to the suggestions that may be found. My hubby and I started reading this book. We are on the first chapter.

 

[Jenna]

I have the book also, and find it very helpful. The more I read on these things, and the deeper that I get into my "Homebuilders" group, the more ironic I find all of these helpful resources. It's an odd day when we find ourselves reaching out for help and understanding when full communication between spouses would go SO far. Isn't it funny how we all need so much help, just in learning how to talk to each other? Let alone how to express ourselves through our actions? Wow. I wonder where things went wrong.... or if they were ever actually "right" to begin with.

*wanders off, thinking*

 

[ManInTheBox]

I was really looking forward to the changes that I was sure would come after my wife and I both read this book. It all made perfect sense to both of us.

My wife is acts of service... and I am Physical Touch.

It's been 8 months or more since we read this book, and I am sad to say that I really can't see any change. My wife is just NOT COMOFORTABLE showing the kind of emotion that I miss in our relationship.
What I had hoped for was that my wife and I would begin spending more quality time together laying on the couch together watching TV or just laying in bed together with her head on my shoulder. I miss seeing the emotion in her eyes and feeling the love in her touch.

My wife is from a family that didn't show much emotion, and rarley even hugged each other. Her for of Love is Acts of Service. She will do things for me and that is great and I do appreciate it, but it doesn't make me feel loved. She is a good Christian woman and she will read any marriage book I ask her to or that she finds herself. She will go to Christian Marriage retreats with me and read devotions on Marriage, but when it comes to actually Applying what she has learned she just doesn't feel comfortable so she doesn't do it.

I really don't know what to do anymore. It is so hard to keep a positive outlook when I don't see any change in the future.

As far as her Acts of Service go, I love to do things for her, she feels loved when I do it and that does make me feel good. It has become harder lately to motivate myself to do as many acts of service (daily) as I have become somewhat depressed over the situation.

Anyway, my adivce to you is to make sure that YOU make sure that YOU put your heart into filling your spouse's love language...... Hopefully he will respond and fullfil yours too. I do think this book has helped ALOT of couples and hopefully you and your husband will be another happy couple after reading it!

 

[Svt4Him]

I just did a talk on this on Tuesday. Great book.

 

[EmSchmem]

I've just received my copy of "The Five Love Languages" I ordered recently. I just had to post and say "WOW!". I haven't even finished reading it yet, and already it's like a light is turned on, and things are becoming clear!! I haven't come to a final conclusion as to what me and my hubby's love languages are but I can see that they are quite different. It seems like our problems are all to do with speaking different languages and I can see how it becomes a viscious circle - he doesn't feel I love him because I don't express love in the way he understands, so he withdraws and doesn't express his love in a way I understand so much ... so we get further apart and feel unloved and blame the other one for stopping loving us. I must get hubby to read it too - please pray that he will and won't dismiss it . Things have been much better anyway since he's been back from his travels and I can see it improving more if we follow some of the ideas in the book. It seems so obvious once you've read it, but it isn't atall until you do!

I recommend this book - if you are having difficulties in your marriage, and feel unloved, or your hubby feels unloved. Try it - you might well find it really helps!

Clairy

Clairy
5 Love Languages is great. Gary Chapman also does a marriage seminar that is AMAZING. I suggest looking for it and seeing when it is coming to a town near you. My husband and I went in January.

 

[HeatherJay]

That seminar is coming to Nashville in September. I'm trying to talk my husband into going. We have friends going, as well. He's being 'responsible' and thinking about spending money that close to Christmas (bless his heart), but I think it would be well worth it.

 

[Marie]

Great book! And equally brilliant concept!

I'm not married, but I enjoy anything related to social science, therefore I have read it. I also recommend The Five Love Languages of God- If any book can make you feel Gods love, that would be the one! Well, besides the Bible, of course