Texan looking for advice...

[Duchess Dines Out]

This is the third place I've posted this... I really need you guys. Thanks.

Here's the post:

Okay, so, the short version goes like this. About a year ago my mom ran away from her husband because of alcohol and abuse issues. They weren't horrible, but she was scared so she fled her home in Florida to come out here (TX) and live in my sisters rental. She was away from him... he didn't know where she lived, worked... nothing. Then for financial reasons she started to communicate with him. She was careful at first, but eventually she gave him her address and phone number. Last week, he SHOWED UP. Uninvited, scary looking, Lifetime movie type of appearence. He said he was looking for a job out here. That he had been following her for a few days. Now, he knows where I live, where my sister lives, where my mom works... the whole nine yards. He left without incident, but she got a call at her office today. This was the message:
"Tell Margery I'll see her on the first."
We are all figuring that he got a job, or at least is moving out here... if it's not that he's going to kill her, which I don't even want to discuss.

I have two children and I don't want anything to happen to them because my mom let this lunatic into our lives. The only thing I can figure is that after the first, I can't be around her anymore. I mean, it's not safe with Lenny lurking in the shadows. Who knows when he'll snap??? But, that means cutting my mother off completely and that really sucks. So, am I over reacting? Should I just move and call it done? Do I tell her that this is how it's going to be? Someone tell me what to do cause I'm heartbroken and confused.

Thanks,
Duchess

 

[Iron Sun 254]

I assume when you say "mom ran away from her husband" it implies that this man is not your father. You let your mother know he is not allowed in your house and that you will not be having any contact with her as long as she lets him in her life. You shouldn't have to uproot your life because of this man who is essentially a stranger to you. If your mother has a key to your house, get it changed. Call your local police and find out if there's anyway to run a criminal check on this guy. And yes, if you really feel nothing will make you safe by all means leave. Moving should be a last resort otherwise you'll spend the rest of your life running from these two.

 

[kleptobismol]

if u feel any threat from this guy contact someone in higher authority...u might be able to get a restraining order on him if he makes any threats or any more abuse. dont try to play the tough gal and suck it in and try to protect everyone by yourself cuz it wont work. kicking your mom out might not guarentee protection for everyone either.. i know it seems kinda weird that im 15 and trying to give u advice, but i've seen this before and its best to get help before its too late. its quite a predicament and if it makes u feel any better, i am praying for you.