Temptation

[Mayflower1]

I have had a hard time lately and the urge to cut has been coming back. It has been hard dealing with it, because I know it doesn't help any, but I have been feeling so very alone and so it has been hard fighting it. No one really cares about me in my family so I really can't tell anyone. If they think crying is a form of weakness, they will definitely see this as weak and laugh at me still.

 

[Mayflower1]

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[Mayflower1]

I feel better. and I didn't do anything I would regret... if that overwhelming feeling comes back though, I am trying to make plans on what to do. I haven't had them in awhile...

 

[berry2000]

Lilly...how awesome. I mean that you made it thru. I know those feelings. Struggle with them still atleast once a month. I am proud of you.

 

[livingforGod135]

I feel better. and I didn't do anything I would regret... if that overwhelming feeling comes back though, I am trying to make plans on what to do. I haven't had them in awhile...

congrats on not doin anythin you'd regret

i'll be praying for u, u r doing so well

 

[Mayflower1]

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[livingforGod135]

I failed today though. I don't know what happened... I made a mistake at work and I felt as if I needed to be punished... it was a trap and I fell into it...

It didn't happen. I am just going to keep going like it didn't happen. I didn't come this far to fall back...

u have the right attitude to this, to not let it pull u down
still praying for u

 

[Nobility]

Oh hun It's not that easy is it?

Please you go and remember you are a precious child of Jesus... And he loves you more than you can ever know Nothing you could, can make him love you even a tiny bit less, and you can't make him love you more by being "better" either.

http://foru.ms/t4465869-things-you-can-do-to-de-escalate-and-divert-an-emergency.html
That link might be helpful when you feel unhappy and like you want to cut. YOu can PM me anytime hun

 

[Kristen.NewCreation]

I'm sorry you're having a tough time. It's great you're not just giving up and giving in though. Sometimes relapse does happen, and those are the moments we try to learn from. What could I have done differently? What was I feeling? What was I thinking? And then try to identify the other options I could possibly have.

I know you don't know me well, but you could always pm. I had a long history of SI, so I do understand how tough it can be. I have several years of being SI free at this point so I don't trigger easily and I'm good at setting boundaries if I'm not in a good space.

Take good care of you.

 

[Mayflower1]

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[Mayflower1]

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[Mayflower1]

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[Kristen.NewCreation]

What has helped you before to get through these times?

You are not alone in this. We are part of your family here... not bio family but chosen family. We are not laughing and won't laugh because you are feeling weak or crying.

Don't turn back girl! You can do this and be strong. You have come this far.

God, be with my sister now. She needs you and your comfort. Give her peace inside and give her your strength.

 

[berry2000]

Dearest Lilly,

So sorry you are going thru this. Don't let the enemy drag you down. Keep looking forward instead of backwards. You have beaten this before and you will again. You are just in a rough patch right now. I think it is even harder when you have beaten it and then fall back into it cuz you feel even worse about it. I am still proud of all you have done and will do because you are fighting it.

I'm here for you via PM anytime my friend.

 

[Mayflower1]

thanks everyone. Better tonight. Wading through again. Last night I realized how much harder it is then before. It is quite worse, but as a friend I talked to last night got me to repeat, "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." Philippians 4:13

I emailed my pastor because I knew if I waited any longer I wouldn't be able to tell anyone. It is going to be hard facing him after what I told him...

 

[Mayflower1]

What has helped you before to get through these times?

as what is helping me now get through these times... the love of Christ Jesus... He did not give up on me, I will not give up on me either. Nor will I ever give up on any of you...

I felt very weak today at work and wanted to go at it again... but I didn't. Good start.

 

[Nobility]

Great for you Hun God loves you heaps

 

[scraparcs]

Jesus loves you...and so do we, hon.

 

[Mayflower1]

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