I'm needing some advice to give to a friend. She has a 16 year old daughter that has a boyfriend that is very controlling, has a bad attitude towards rules and no respect for adults. Her daughter has been dating this boy for about a year now and it has caused numerous arguments within the family because everyone sees how bad the boy is except the daughter. As a friend I have tried to give advice because my daughter also was seeing a boy similar to this, but I just made it difficult for them to see or talk to each other and it worked, now she has a really nice christian boyfriend. My friend finally reached her breaking point when she caught them using the phone at 3am and has now forbid them from seeing each other, but that has caused her daughter to hate her. What is a parent suppose to do when your child is dating someone that is bad for them? because we all know they can just go behind your back if they really want to see each other. Has anyone else been through this and have any ideas on what should be done. To me its like the boy is a bad drug that her daughter is hooked on. Thanks for any advice.
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Teen Problems
- Thread starter stormywaters
- Start date
- Aug 3, 2004
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Sadly, such things happen. The really important issue is for the parents to work hard at maintaining a good relationship with their daughter. Confrontation or forbidding is most likely to damage the relationship. Talking non jugementally and expressing their concerns without attacking either of them allows for the daughter to come to her own decisions in her own time and not losing her parents in the process. It's hard, but any break in relationship will be even harder.
John
NZ
John
NZ
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I was 16 not too long ago and if I remember correctly if your mum & dad say no it's all the while more interesting.
Instead of telling her she can't see the boyfriend, say that if she continues to see this guy she will have little or no freedom, no phone, no going out on school nights, no tv, no stero etc...and inforce the rules...if she sneeks the phone or anything else forbidden has she consdiered the loss of the bedroom door? A friend of mine at 15-16 slaked off in school and lost her tv and bedroom door, after a few weeks she decided she'd rather have a door and a tv.
Instead of telling her she can't see the boyfriend, say that if she continues to see this guy she will have little or no freedom, no phone, no going out on school nights, no tv, no stero etc...and inforce the rules...if she sneeks the phone or anything else forbidden has she consdiered the loss of the bedroom door? A friend of mine at 15-16 slaked off in school and lost her tv and bedroom door, after a few weeks she decided she'd rather have a door and a tv.
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