Struggling with temptation and anxiety

[Kromagg73]

For the last three years i have been playing a very bad game, a virtual world that has taken up almost all of my time during the day and night. I have even ignored my five year old daughter and my wife. I quit over a week ago, but i am finding it so hard to be strong, not in the fact that i want to go back, but more the addiction of wanting to talk with others, preferrably female.

I was always talking with women from all over the world, i became addicted and after realizing what it was doing to my life, i had to quit. I am trying so hard to just find things to do with my time during the day instead of trying to log onto yahoo messanger or check my email constantly. It is rough, i would rather spend my time trying to apply for a job, read the bible or just find better things to do with my time. It is an addiction that i need to quit. I also pay a mmorpg called Star Wars: The Old Republic and i'm in a christian guild. I have told them and i'm hoping i can put this behind me.

I know it's not easy to not want to talk to people when that's all i've been used to for the last three years. Also, part of my problem is that i have failed to take any of my meds, so my diabetes, thyorid and bipolar depression is out of control. I just need to try and get back on my feet, but it all seems so difficult. However, i have been praying, but i feel i am outweighed with the devil really trying to keep me down.

Please pray for me, i just need to talk to people who can encourage me to be strong. It is hard and this is so not like me, but right now i feel like i have hit rock bottom.

 

[If Not For Grace]

Poor choices will always net poor results. You have already identified some problems.
Correct that. Get back on the meds-that's an easy step. God will not do for you what you are to do for yourself. If you think otherwise, ask Him to fix dinner for you. He will provide you with the means but if you don't use em, you will starve to death. Look round the world for proof.

Once you do that you will be able to make better decisions and NOT have to fight your body and mind at the same time-Addictions are not easy to break, but you must first have the ability to think clearly which in your current state-you are doing remarakable just to get where you are already. Give the meds a chance to get the body back in balance and things will look alot brighter.

 

[justlikeThomas]

Hello there brother,
You have already taken the largest step toward defeating your addiction- and that is stopping. congratulations!

my suggestion to you is that, if you plan on quitting these online games and chats, you must stop it completely. that includes any forums or IRC chats or anything of the sort that may attract you back. you have done so well in quitting, so don't give up. hold your ground

it is also very important that you find something to replace your old habits. I find that the best way to do this is to find some kind of church service and join. it will help you by occupying your time in a positive manner, and you get to meet new people and make friends.

nothing is too difficult for you. with the support of your wife and young daughter, I am confident that you will succeed and put this behind you and never look back.

finally, as a pharmacist, it is very hard for me to ignore the fact that you do not take your medication. your health is very important. diabetes, when uncontrolled can cause other diseases and we do not want that. do not forget that our bodies have been given to us by God and we must take care of them as best as we can. may I suggest a pillbox to remind you to take your medication every day? taking your medication properly and being consistent will make you feel great!

if you have any questions, just ask

I pray you succeed in all your goals.

 

[Kromagg73]

Thank You for your kind words, the worst thing i have right now is the anxiety, the feeling of "oh i want to go chat with someone", it's just stuck in my brain and trying to resist it is hard enough. I do know that i need to find other things to take up my time as i know i will get through this.

Some of it i think is just the way my mind is being right now due to not taking my meds for depression. I started tonight, but it's the lowest dose, but as long as i stay on it i can increase it each week.

I know it may not be easy to just quit something i am so used to for so long, but i know i can do it. It's the same as looking at a nice yummy cake and then trying to resist from taking a bite, it's hard to do when we all know how good it tastes.

 

[justlikeThomas]

if you want to chat, we are all here for you I see that you are new to this site, and forgot to welcome you! its a great place here. when you have 15 posts, you'll be able to send Personal Messages to people. it is very easy to find someone to talk to in this wonderful community.

keep strong, my friend. I know someone who was quitting a bad habit, and instead of giving in, he would go read a story to his son who was 4 at the time. try and find something like that to avoid giving in, you will find that it gets much much easier.

when you are able to send PMs, feel free to message me about anything. I hope you have a wonderful night!

 

[Kromagg73]

Yeah, for me it is more taking the time to find something else to do with my time. I did think that i can always open Teamspeak and talk to my guild members who i play with in an online game. Even if i am not talking, it will keep me from trying to enter chat rooms, that's where i go wrong. I should also start to read the bible, so many interesting stories in there and with all my time i have being unemployed it would be nice to use that time wisely.

It is hard when i am home alone all day, it gets boring and being used to chatting all day long does become a part of my life, but i know i can break it. I am glad i found these forums, it will be nice to talk to people who are encouraging.

 

[If Not For Grace]

Make a list of all the things you WANT to do-like be around awhile, like keep your family, etc.

Get rid of the toys-have your wife handle the blocks and passwords and no need for you to know them. Find another activity to do in place of the time you were spending-like woodworking, hunting, playing chess w/the wife, cooking,exercising, Sex -whatever you got a good chance of enjoying and sticking with and develop a routine of doing these things so you won't have as much time to dwell on it. IF the computer is a temptaion, put it in a PUBLIC place and limit the TIME you will spend on it-make it ODD like 5-7 am (not alot of people to talk to then) Develop relationships with real people as well as virtual friends...Little by little.