Struggling with sexual sin. Am I doomed?

[Notbybreadalone]

Hi everyone,

I'm a Christian, brought up in a Christian home and grown up in church all my life. For 4 years now, I've been paying for sexual services at brothels. This occurred sporadically over the course of the 4 years and has caused me loose a lot of money and self worth as a Christian. During all this time, I've been attending church regularly and kept going back and forth this forgiveness loop to get things right with God.

I'm to the point that I feel worthless, dirty, sinful and remorseful for what was going through my head when I visited the brothels. I have lost count of the women whom I have had sexual intercourse with and am fearful of my health (STDs) and my current spiritual state. I have a fear that I will never ever be clean in God's eyes with the amount of sexual sin I've committed. Help.

 

[Purge187]

The greatest Christian of all time knew how you felt:

Romans 7:15-20 - I do not understand what I do. For what - Bible Gateway

Be honest with God about your shortcomings and ask for His help.

 

[Hawthourne]

"I'm to the point that I feel worthless, dirty, sinful and remorseful."

Good. You heard me right, God loves it when we get to the point where we feel utterly helpless and as though our conduct is as rags. Once we hit that point, we no longer trust in our own "goodness" or ego. It is once we have utterly given up hope in ourselves and place our faith in Him that we may begin the process of healing.

If you are a child of God, and have honestly given yourself to Christ, then your sin has no power over you. You actions can not make your either better or worse. True, your habits and addictions threaten your spiritual closeness to Christ, but they cannot ever make you so bad that he will withdraw his grace from you. Obviously, these things in your life really need to go, but I would council that you first place your priority in drawing nearer to Christ. Begin to make a habit of daily prayer and devotional, seeking to spend more time in his radiance. The more your immerse yourself, the less of a hold these other things will have.

Does that make them magically go away? Of course not. However, God doesn't want you to fix your conduct so that you may draw near to him, he wants you to draw near to him so that he may help you to fix your conduct

Remember, David had a guy murdered so that he could steal his wife and Paul directly oversaw the persecution of Christians- but Christ's sacrifice was strong enough to cleanse both of those men.

 

[whitebeaches]

Mod Hat On​

This thread has been moved from the Struggles With Sexuality forum​

Mod Hat Off​

 

[AGTG]

First and foremost, confess this to Father God, if you haven't already. Recognize the blood of Jesus has cleansed you of all this sexual immorality. Then, declare boldly that you cut all ties with the kingdom of darkness related to this sin.

This is the first step in repentance. Then, pray, fast, seek His face for deliverance. When the temptation comes to do this thing, call upon Jesus for strength to overcome it. He will always give you the way of escape.

You need deliverance from this demonic stronghold within you, and that may be painful at first as you turn from this wickedness in sincere godly sorrow.

But... Deliverance will come! And Jesus will break the bondage of this sin in your life. Don't go back again! The demon who has got a handhold on your heart with this sin won't go without a fight. But Jesus can deliver you from this. Trust Him. It may take a couple days. It may take a week or two. It may take a month or more.

But... If you do as I've advised, you will wake up one morning and know that He has set you free from this sin and the power of it will then be outside of you instead of inside of you. It will be weak, and you will have a testimony that glorifies the power of Jesus to share with the world.

 

[Edouard]

This I think is not just about what you are doing - but more about why you are doing it.

You are searching to be loved. Patience - God will provide you with someone who is for you. But it is in His time not ours.

Hebrews and Romans 1 tells us that eventually - God will turn us over in our sin.


May the Power of the Holy Spirit be with you always.
Grace and Peace be with you.

 

[stormdancer0]

Sin is sin. If you were habitually lying, would you feel this way? Possibly not.

The fact that it's a sexual sin makes it feel like it's worse. But James tells us if we are guilty of breaking one part of the law, we are guilty of breaking the whole law.

So yes, pray and repent. Have a trusted person you can call, a pastor or elder, so that when you feel tempted, you have an out. Use the person when you feel tempted in the least.

But also, do get some counseling. Especially if you think you're addicted to sex. It is a very real, very widespread problem.

 

[ob77]

Hi everyone,

I'm a Christian, brought up in a Christian home and grown up in church all my life. For 4 years now, I've been paying for sexual services at brothels. This occurred sporadically over the course of the 4 years and has caused me loose a lot of money and self worth as a Christian. During all this time, I've been attending church regularly and kept going back and forth this forgiveness loop to get things right with God.

I'm to the point that I feel worthless, dirty, sinful and remorseful for what was going through my head when I visited the brothels. I have lost count of the women whom I have had sexual intercourse with and am fearful of my health (STDs) and my current spiritual state. I have a fear that I will never ever be clean in God's eyes with the amount of sexual sin I've committed. Help.

There were prostitutes in Christ's time, He told them to sin no more, but did not condemn them to death. God will not condemn you either by the desires of the flesh, for it is simply flesh that demands it. Your spirit is not flesh, nor is it destined by the flesh. None of us are worthy by the flesh, but only by spirit. That which is spirit is spirit, that which is flesh is flesh. It is only the spirit that goes back to the father. You will not have a list of bad things written on a page when you get back. If you repent and have a change of heart, nothing will be held against you.

 

[ob77]

Hi everyone,

I'm a Christian, brought up in a Christian home and grown up in church all my life. For 4 years now, I've been paying for sexual services at brothels. This occurred sporadically over the course of the 4 years and has caused me loose a lot of money and self worth as a Christian. During all this time, I've been attending church regularly and kept going back and forth this forgiveness loop to get things right with God.

I'm to the point that I feel worthless, dirty, sinful and remorseful for what was going through my head when I visited the brothels. I have lost count of the women whom I have had sexual intercourse with and am fearful of my health (STDs) and my current spiritual state. I have a fear that I will never ever be clean in God's eyes with the amount of sexual sin I've committed. Help.

There were prostitutes in Christ's time, He told them to sin no more, but did not condemn them to death. God will not condemn you either by the desires of the flesh, for it is simply flesh that demands it. Your spirit is not flesh, nor is it destined by the flesh. None of us are worthy by the flesh, but only by spirit. That which is spirit is spirit, that which is flesh is flesh. It is only the spirit that goes back to the father. You will not have a list of bad things written on a page when you get back. If you repent and have a change of heart, nothing will be held against you.

 

[Presbyterian Continuist]

The very fact that you see what you are doing is wrong proves that the Holy Spirit is bringing you under conviction. This is a work of God's grace in your life. Only Christ can set you free from this, but first, you need to fully embrace Christ for yourself and not trust in your Christian upbringing. Your upbringing has educated you in the religious side of Christianity and so you know the theory of it, but you need to come to Christ for yourself and give your own heart to Christ on a personal basis. You need to confess to Christ that regardless of your religious upbringing, you are still a helpless sinner without hope and deserve nothing else but God's wrath. Then you need to know that while you are in that state, Christ loves you and gave Himself for you. He died on the cross to take away the guilt of your sin and to place it on Himself. Then He rose from the dead to make you justified and acceptable to God. When you accept that and confess that you believe that before God, you are then born again by the work of the Holy Spirit in your life. Then you are on the path to sanctification. You are then deemed to be totally righteous before God. Your sinfulness is taken away and you are clothed with the righteousness of Christ. But the work of sanctification has to continue because overcoming the deeds of sin takes longer. But the victory is that you are daily overcoming sinful habits and practices from a standpoint of being totally without guilt, shame or sense of inferiority before God. This is the good news of the Gospel. You need to get the foundation right first.

Then you can say to God, "By your Grace, I will get the victory over my sinful practices. I am weak, but you are strong. Your strength is made perfect in my weakness." You will find that the desire to continue in sinful practice will slowly and surely diminish over time as the Holy Spirit does His work in you. Remember that relapse is part of the sanctification process. But the Psalmist said that when he falls, he gets up and keeps going. What goes wrong is when a person falls, gets into unbelief and does not get up and keep going. The Scripture says that he who perseveres will be fully saved. Perseverance through success and failure is the key to a successful Christian life.

 

[tturt]

Welcome to the forums.

We need Godly sorrow for our sins (II Cor 7:10-11) so repentance is necessary.

Our behavior is based on our thought life. As believers, we can ask The Holy Spirit for help. When the thought comes to pursue this behavior, stop and ask The Holy Spirit to help you and thank Him for giving you self control (or any fruit of The Spirit, Gal 5).

When the thought comes again, repeat. By relying on Him and His Word, you will be successful because of His promises such as "I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me." Phil 4:13

Blessings to you, tturt

 

[Gunny]

The very fact that you see what you are doing is wrong proves that the Holy Spirit is bringing you under conviction. This is a work of God's grace in your life. Only Christ can set you free from this, but first, you need to fully embrace Christ for yourself and not trust in your Christian upbringing. Your upbringing has educated you in the religious side of Christianity and so you know the theory of it, but you need to come to Christ for yourself and give your own heart to Christ on a personal basis. You need to confess to Christ that regardless of your religious upbringing, you are still a helpless sinner without hope and deserve nothing else but God's wrath. Then you need to know that while you are in that state, Christ loves you and gave Himself for you. He died on the cross to take away the guilt of your sin and to place it on Himself. Then He rose from the dead to make you justified and acceptable to God. When you accept that and confess that you believe that before God, you are then born again by the work of the Holy Spirit in your life. Then you are on the path to sanctification. You are then deemed to be totally righteous before God. Your sinfulness is taken away and you are clothed with the righteousness of Christ. But the work of sanctification has to continue because overcoming the deeds of sin takes longer. But the victory is that you are daily overcoming sinful habits and practices from a standpoint of being totally without guilt, shame or sense of inferiority before God. This is the good news of the Gospel. You need to get the foundation right first.

Then you can say to God, "By your Grace, I will get the victory over my sinful practices. I am weak, but you are strong. Your strength is made perfect in my weakness." You will find that the desire to continue in sinful practice will slowly and surely diminish over time as the Holy Spirit does His work in you. Remember that relapse is part of the sanctification process. But the Psalmist said that when he falls, he gets up and keeps going. What goes wrong is when a person falls, gets into unbelief and does not get up and keep going. The Scripture says that he who perseveres will be fully saved. Perseverance through success and failure is the key to a successful Christian life.

Amen and Amen.

 

[walkinginthelightnow]

Fornicators will NOT inherit the kingdom of God. Paul warns vehemently on this. Jesus said its better to cut off the offending member of our body. Literal or physical it must be done to prevent soul damnation. Some people say only figuratively but when it comes to our soul, it's best to cut it off...no matter how intense the cutting may be.

If you realize the error of your way you need to stop sinning. Jesus said, "Go and sin no more, lest a worse thing happen to you." What is the worse thing? Eternal separation from God? God only knows.