Struggling **Trigger Warning**

[believeume]

How long have you been depressed? Did anything happen to you or did it always just seem that way?

A fair while, I was trapped in an apartment for more than a year with neighbour's from hell compounding my mental illness.

The authorities watched and did nothing.

My family watched and did nothing.

The real estate watched and did nothing.

The doctors ganged up on me and threw me into hospital.

I better stop, im pretty close to smashing my phone.

 

[Received]

A fair while, I was trapped in an apartment for more than a year with neighbour's from hell compounding my mental illness.

The authorities watched and did nothing.

My family watched and did nothing.

The real estate watched and did nothing.

The doctors ganged up on me and threw me into hospital.

I better stop, im pretty close to smashing my phone.

I don't want you to smash your phone, so if what I'm talking about is too much please let me know.

What I want to know is, what does it mean to you that your neighbor did this, your family did nothing, others did nothing, etc.?

 

[believeume]

I don't want you to smash your phone, so if what I'm talking about is too much please let me know.

What I want to know is, what does it mean to you that your neighbor did this, your family did nothing, others did nothing, etc.?

Yep, they just didn't take my cries for help seriously because mentally ill people get type cast with an inability to see reality normally.

When the neighbour's found that out it was to their advantage, they used my mental illness as their excuse.

 

[Received]

Yep, they just didn't take my cries for help seriously because mentally ill people get type cast with an inability to see reality normally.

When the neighbour's found that out it was to their advantage, they used my mental illness as their excuse.

And if they don't take your cries for help seriously, what does that mean to you? It sounds like you're saying you believe that nobody really cares about you...?

 

[believeume]

And if they don't take your cries for help seriously, what does that mean to you? It sounds like you're saying you believe that nobody really cares about you...?

I think people do care, but they are so busy caring that they can't see if their caring is having adverse effects.

 

[Received]

I think people do care, but they are so busy caring that they can't see if their caring is having adverse effects.

Interesting point.

Anyways, I was asking those questions to see what beliefs you have about others or yourself. A few things determine depression. One is physiological health, and part of this could be deficits in serotonin, but also norepinephrine and dopamine. It really depends on what flavor your depression most has. If you have ruminative or obsessive thinking (and depression increases for many in proportion to how much they ruminate or think over and over again on things) then correcting serotonin can be a godsend; if lack of energy it's norepinephrine (NRIs, norepinephrine reuptake inhibitors); if it's lack of pleasure (anhedonia) it's dopamine (SDRI, selective dopamine reuptake inhibitors).

Most of psychiatry and almost all of psychotherapy and counseling stop there, but there are other health-related aspects that can increase the incidence of depression, such as inadequate thyroid hormone, B vitamins (including B12 and folate, as well as a genetic polymorphism called MTHFR which limits the body's use of these vitamins), sex hormones (one theory as to why depression rates are so much higher in women than men is because of estrogen, which can become too high in relation to progesterone or just too high in general), or adrenal hormones (cortisol especially). The newer stuff is pointing to depression as a (neuro) inflammatory disease, even related to gut health, where a "leaky gut" (intestinal permeability) can cause problems with the gut-brain axis, leading to inflammation and reduction of activity in the frontal lobes.

I hope I'm not boring you. These are real options for treatment.

Anyways, I recommend everyone who has suffered from depression, especially if it doesn't seem to be related to psychological causes mentioned below, to get bloodwork pulled, such as thyroid (TSH, free T3, free T4, thyroid antibodies, reverse T3, and run screaming from any doc who only pulls TSH, as this is a pituitary hormone and not a thyroid hormone), B12 and folate and if possible a full Nutraeval panel which looks at multiple nutrition-related deficiencies, sex hormones (estrogen, progesterone, sex hormone binding globulin), and adrenal hormones (ACTH, cortisol). For possible inflammation, I recommend anti-inflammatory supplements and diets, as well as addressing gut health, which can be done by cleaning up your diet and taking a good probiotic, and for the inflammation bit taking supplements like fish oil, krill oil, and anything else with EPA and DHA.

For psychological causes, you're looking at beliefs or attitudes you have toward yourself, the world/other people, and your future and past, so if you have one or more negative views (e.g., I'm a failure, nobody cares about me, etc.), you increase the chances of depression. It sounds like you have hurtful feelings that express as anger (anger is almost always a secondary emotion to primary softer emotions like hurt or fear) toward other people, which might mean you have negative beliefs toward others. I don't know, you'd have to answer that in more detail. I will say that a lot of people I've counseled have hurtful feelings and negative beliefs toward other people because on a deeper level they think they are the ones who are somehow responsible, believing themselves to be defective, worthless, a failure, or abandoned by others.

On top of this, you have mindfulness meditation approaches, which teach you how to defuse from your thoughts (i.e., stop identifying with them or considering them real, as opposed to just thoughts or passing phenomena in your mind), and mindfulness and acceptance for depression is currently the hot approach in psychotherapy and counseling.

I know that's a lot, but it's the best info that's out there for depression. If you're a reader, I recommend checking out Ilardi's book The Depression Cure, Young and Klosko's Reinventing Your Life, and the book by authors whose names I've forgotten, The Mindful Way Through Depression.

There are options out there. A good therapist is always a good one, but I know that can be expensive.

 

[believeume]

Interesting point.

Anyways, I was asking those questions to see what beliefs you have about others or yourself. A few things determine depression. One is physiological health, and part of this could be deficits in serotonin, but also norepinephrine and dopamine. It really depends on what flavor your depression most has. If you have ruminative or obsessive thinking (and depression increases for many in proportion to how much they ruminate or think over and over again on things) then correcting serotonin can be a godsend; if lack of energy it's norepinephrine (NRIs, norepinephrine reuptake inhibitors); if it's lack of pleasure (anhedonia) it's dopamine (SDRI, selective dopamine reuptake inhibitors).

Most of psychiatry and almost all of psychotherapy and counseling stop there, but there are other health-related aspects that can increase the incidence of depression, such as inadequate thyroid hormone, B vitamins (including B12 and folate, as well as a genetic polymorphism called MTHFR which limits the body's use of these vitamins), sex hormones (one theory as to why depression rates are so much higher in women than men is because of estrogen, which can become too high in relation to progesterone or just too high in general), or adrenal hormones (cortisol especially). The newer stuff is pointing to depression as a (neuro) inflammatory disease, even related to gut health, where a "leaky gut" (intestinal permeability) can cause problems with the gut-brain axis, leading to inflammation and reduction of activity in the frontal lobes.

I hope I'm not boring you. These are real options for treatment.

Anyways, I recommend everyone who has suffered from depression, especially if it doesn't seem to be related to psychological causes mentioned below, to get bloodwork pulled, such as thyroid (TSH, free T3, free T4, thyroid antibodies, reverse T3, and run screaming from any doc who only pulls TSH, as this is a pituitary hormone and not a thyroid hormone), B12 and folate and if possible a full Nutraeval panel which looks at multiple nutrition-related deficiencies, sex hormones (estrogen, progesterone, sex hormone binding globulin), and adrenal hormones (ACTH, cortisol). For possible inflammation, I recommend anti-inflammatory supplements and diets, as well as addressing gut health, which can be done by cleaning up your diet and taking a good probiotic, and for the inflammation bit taking supplements like fish oil, krill oil, and anything else with EPA and DHA.

For psychological causes, you're looking at beliefs or attitudes you have toward yourself, the world/other people, and your future and past, so if you have one or more negative views (e.g., I'm a failure, nobody cares about me, etc.), you increase the chances of depression. It sounds like you have hurtful feelings that express as anger (anger is almost always a secondary emotion to primary softer emotions like hurt or fear) toward other people, which might mean you have negative beliefs toward others. I don't know, you'd have to answer that in more detail. I will say that a lot of people I've counseled have hurtful feelings and negative beliefs toward other people because on a deeper level they think they are the ones who are somehow responsible, believing themselves to be defective, worthless, a failure, or abandoned by others.

On top of this, you have mindfulness meditation approaches, which teach you how to defuse from your thoughts (i.e., stop identifying with them or considering them real, as opposed to just thoughts or passing phenomena in your mind), and mindfulness and acceptance for depression is currently the hot approach in psychotherapy and counseling.

I know that's a lot, but it's the best info that's out there for depression. If you're a reader, I recommend checking out Ilardi's book The Depression Cure, Young and Klosko's Reinventing Your Life, and the book by authors whose names I've forgotten, The Mindful Way Through Depression.

There are options out there. A good therapist is always a good one, but I know that can be expensive.

Depression comes and goes, it's not a real problem.

It's more the stigma around the schizophrenia that is causing my anger and frustration. I did have serious IBS, couldn't work out what the cause was until a year ago.

It was sugar, now my IBS is gone.

My views about the world and people is otherworldly, it does not fit in this newsprint world. And because of those ideas I am close to be thrown into jail, hell I still could if I go on another mission.

 

[ToBeLoved]

Yep, they just didn't take my cries for help seriously because mentally ill people get type cast with an inability to see reality normally.

When the neighbour's found that out it was to their advantage, they used my mental illness as their excuse.

Yes both of these things are true.

We are especially judged harshly by Christians because they invalidate what we have and any issues as not being saved or not having enough faith. There are many avenues they can take from your mental health issues are not real, but perceived or faked to no one should be on any medication.

That is why you only trust certain people with the information. It is not everyone else's business, your health issues.

 

[ToBeLoved]

Depression comes and goes, it's not a real problem.

It's more the stigma around the schizophrenia that is causing my anger and frustration. I did have serious IBS, couldn't work out what the cause was until a year ago.

It was sugar, now my IBS is gone.

My views about the world and people is otherworldly, it does not fit in this newsprint world. And because of those ideas I am close to be thrown into jail, hell I still could if I go on another mission.

Are you taking meds for your schizophrenia? Regularly and every day?

 

[believeume]

Yes both of these things are true.

We are especially judged harshly by Christians because they invalidate what we have and any issues as not being saved or not having enough faith. There are many avenues they can take from your mental health issues are not real, but perceived or faked to no one should be on any medication.

That is why you only trust certain people with the information. It is not everyone else's business, your health issues.

Ahha, I understand your thinking.

 

[believeume]

Are you taking meds for your schizophrenia? Regularly and every day?

Why, it's not a cure.

 

[believeume]

Well things have gotten to breaking point, I'm better off living outside forever.

If it doesn't work out it's building time.

 

[ToBeLoved]

Why, it's not a cure.

Because it will regulate your body with the things that your body is not getting naturally. It will even out your thinking and allow you to make the best and most rational decisions with your mental illness.

It's very important.

 

[believeume]

Because it will regulate your body with the things that your body is not getting naturally. It will even out your thinking and allow you to make the best and most rational decisions with your mental illness.

It's very important.

Here we are talking about being assisted by science, but you know it would be more simple for Jesus to just heal me.

Why keep on my meds?

Does Jesus need meds to heal me?

 

[ToBeLoved]

Here we are talking about being assisted by science, but you know it would be more simple for Jesus to just heal me.

Why keep on my meds?

Does Jesus need meds to heal me?

I can say with great confidence that God chooses who He will heal.

I am giving you my best advice on the meds situation. But you can study up a little on the side effects of certain medication and see what happens when someone experiences withdrawl from not being consistant. Been there myself a few times. Would advise against it.

 

[aiki]

Here we are talking about being assisted by science, but you know it would be more simple for Jesus to just heal me.

Why keep on my meds?

Does Jesus need meds to heal me?

No, he doesn't. But why would Jesus heal you only to have you die someday and go to Hell? What sort of healing is that? He wants to give you eternal healing and that is only found in himself. He is eternal life. He is joy, peace, and love. Do you want him? Or do you just want to be free of your problems? Most people just want God to fix them, to take away their problems, but they have no interest in surrendering their lives to Him. They pray, and pray, and pray for healing and never get it because they have no interest, no love, for the Healer. But real healing, enduring, eternal healing is found in the Healer; He is Himself the healing we need. Do you want Him?

Selah.

 

[ToBeLoved]

Well things have gotten to breaking point, I'm better off living outside forever.

If it doesn't work out it's building time.

Can you please explain to me how living outside would be better? How can that be?

 

[ToBeLoved]

Here we are talking about being assisted by science, but you know it would be more simple for Jesus to just heal me.

Why keep on my meds?

Does Jesus need meds to heal me?

God chooses who He will heal and who He does not. I've been through what you are talking about for a long time, over 6 years. God chooses. That's the way it is. It took me a long time to come to that conclusion and accept it. Don't do that to yourself. Trust God and let that go.

 

[aiki]

Just wanted to reiterate:

Most people just want God to fix them, to take away their problems, but they have no interest in surrendering their lives to Him. They pray, and pray, and pray for healing and never get it because they have no interest, no love, for the Healer. But real healing, enduring, eternal healing is found in the Healer; He is Himself the healing we need. Do you want Him?

Selah.