I feel as if my step-mom is trying to seduce me. She cheated with my dad on my mom and my dad has gotten somewhat unsatisfactory you might say with age and weight. Whenever I am around my step-mom it feels as if she tries to find excuses and reasons to touch me or she tries to compliment me on things that should be kept between people in a relationship-nothing sexuall, yet at least. It sickens me and I can't stand her. Should I tell someone about this? Or just stay on guard? Any other advice would be appreciated.
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Step-mom Seducing
- Thread starter Jocklen
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TrustingmyLord
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Yes, definitely tell someone. This woman is putting you in a horribly awkward situatuin and it is wrong.
You should/could tell your dad. Depending on how he is though, he might not be the best person to tell. How do you feel he will respond? You should also tell your mother. Perhaps you could get your mother and father together and talk to them at the same time.
In the meantime, you might consider telling the stepmom something the next time this happens. Let her know you do NOT like the way she acts around you. Be firm and make it clear.
If you are not comfortable talking to your parents, do talk to someone. Perhaps a pastor, a friends parent, someone you feel you can talk to. Dont wait long.
You said there has been nothing sexual yet. Do you feel like sharing what things she is saying to you? Theres a slight chance she may be trying to befriend you, but one usually knows when someone is hitting on them. So if these are the vibes you get from her, you should definitely speak out about it.
You should/could tell your dad. Depending on how he is though, he might not be the best person to tell. How do you feel he will respond? You should also tell your mother. Perhaps you could get your mother and father together and talk to them at the same time.
In the meantime, you might consider telling the stepmom something the next time this happens. Let her know you do NOT like the way she acts around you. Be firm and make it clear.
If you are not comfortable talking to your parents, do talk to someone. Perhaps a pastor, a friends parent, someone you feel you can talk to. Dont wait long.
You said there has been nothing sexual yet. Do you feel like sharing what things she is saying to you? Theres a slight chance she may be trying to befriend you, but one usually knows when someone is hitting on them. So if these are the vibes you get from her, you should definitely speak out about it.
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you should put in prayer requests for her, and your family.
is your mom any help? you should at least tell your mom if you can. surely you can at least tell your mom this stepmother gives you the creeps and some of the other things you've mentioned here. she may not know what to do, but it will be helpful if you tell others your concerns.
is your mom any help? you should at least tell your mom if you can. surely you can at least tell your mom this stepmother gives you the creeps and some of the other things you've mentioned here. she may not know what to do, but it will be helpful if you tell others your concerns.
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TrustingmyLord
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I think he means to say that when his parents were together, the stepmom and his dad had an affair.
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Redguard
Make It So, Number One!
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Gotcha.
In any case, this sounds like a case for sexual assault if she's touching him in ways that he's uncomfortable with, expecially considering his age.
Maybe the police should be involved.
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sinneD
Well-Known Member
Jocklen...
If it is definitely inappropriate, then you should tell someone.. but based on what you said, it sounds to me as though she may be making you uncomfortable, but nothing inappropriate ("s3xual") has been done..
If that is the case, then telling someone doesn't really have much bearing, as she has not yet done anything "wrong"..
I do think you need to have a talk with her.. tell her to please not touch you or discuss things with you that make you uncomfortable..
You might also consider having a discussion with your Dad.. tell him that you feel a little uncomfortable in the situation..
Otherwise, I think you should just be on your guard.. avoid placing yourself in situations where you are alone with her (if that is possible), and if something starts that shouldn't, then by all means leave immediately and call your Dad, mom, a friends parent, or some other responsible adult.
Feel free to PM or e-mail me if you want to discuss further.. all my contact information is in my profile..
Dennis
And Jocklen, welcome to CF...
If it is definitely inappropriate, then you should tell someone.. but based on what you said, it sounds to me as though she may be making you uncomfortable, but nothing inappropriate ("s3xual") has been done..
If that is the case, then telling someone doesn't really have much bearing, as she has not yet done anything "wrong"..
I do think you need to have a talk with her.. tell her to please not touch you or discuss things with you that make you uncomfortable..
You might also consider having a discussion with your Dad.. tell him that you feel a little uncomfortable in the situation..
Otherwise, I think you should just be on your guard.. avoid placing yourself in situations where you are alone with her (if that is possible), and if something starts that shouldn't, then by all means leave immediately and call your Dad, mom, a friends parent, or some other responsible adult.
Feel free to PM or e-mail me if you want to discuss further.. all my contact information is in my profile..
Dennis
And Jocklen, welcome to CF...
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JeCrois
Je Crois (zshuh kwah) = 'I believe'
By the way, welcome to CF.Is this a new marriage for your dad and step-mom?
Maybe...this is just a maybe...she might be trying a little too hard to make you feel accepted and comfortable with her. I don't know the woman, but maybe she is one of those naturally touchy-feely, flirty girls who doesn't know that her behavior comes across as seductive. In that case she might completely understand that she over-stepped her boudaries if you explain to her how you feel.
Just a thought from the other side of the situation.
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Yes that does somewhat describe her personallity. However, she has only started doing this in the past half year when I have almost finished puberty. She has never done anything like this before I was "developed" which is why I am worried and every day it seems to get worse.
Is this a new marriage for your dad and step-mom?
Maybe...this is just a maybe...she might be trying a little too hard to make you feel accepted and comfortable with her. I don't know the woman, but maybe she is one of those naturally touchy-feely, flirty girls who doesn't know that her behavior comes across as seductive. In that case she might completely understand that she over-stepped her boudaries if you explain to her how you feel.
Just a thought from the other side of the situation.
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TrustingmyLord
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I think you need to be bold and speak out. Let her know she is making you feel uncomfortable. You can first do this politely (but firmly) and if that doesnt work, get bolder.
I dont know a whole lot about women with this personality, but maybe this is her way of getting you to like her, her way of trying to make you feel "special." Some people have warped minds and no common sense. Also, its all in the news lately about older women and young guys. She may keep doing this more and more until you put a stop to it.
No matter why she is doing this, it needs to stop.
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micbmac
Veteran
How can you tell a 15 year old boy to "smack" or "knock the crap" out of a woman? Never Never hit anyone. Especially a woman. And yes he does need to tell someone, his dad, his mom and perhaps a counciler. Good grief, don't give advice to a child if it's going to involve violence. Instead of hitting her, walk away. Never lay hands on anyone. particularly a woman.
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Solidlyhere
Well-Known Member
I guess it depends what the OP hopes to accomplish. 1) Get rid of her? Call the Child Protective Service, and file a complaint against her, for hitting on you. This will bring a Social Worker to your house, who will explain the facts of under-age goofing around to her. 2) Have her stop? Tell her, flat-out: I don't want you touching me. It makes me sick. 3) Tell Daddy about her constant touching, and ask him to have a talk with step-Mommy.
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Weasel7711
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u r at the age still needs protection and a v important age period in your life, u must be sure to have a good growing envorionment for your spiirtual and physical . So must tell someone u can trust. your male friend or someone else, or your mom , and must take this matter seriously
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JeCrois
Je Crois (zshuh kwah) = 'I believe'
If everyone would read the OP....we don't know if what this woman is doing is illegal, so we can't suggest that she be threated with jail time. And for heaven's sake definitely not violence!
All we know is that she is making her step-son feel uncomfortable...not in a sexual way, and not in an abusive way. We don't even know if her behavior is with or without good intention. She may just want his acceptance and is expressing that want in an inappropriate manner. Then again, maybe she is just a crazy broad with a whacked up emotional problem...we can't be the judges of that.
The bottom line is that what she is doing to Jocklen is unacceptable. He is no longer a child and that should be respected.
So Jocklen, there are only two options if you want her to stop treating you this way. Either you, yourself talk to her, or get someone you trust to talk to her...Unless you just avoid her altogether, but then where is there a solution to that? The problem will still be there if no one ever talks to her.
All we know is that she is making her step-son feel uncomfortable...not in a sexual way, and not in an abusive way. We don't even know if her behavior is with or without good intention. She may just want his acceptance and is expressing that want in an inappropriate manner. Then again, maybe she is just a crazy broad with a whacked up emotional problem...we can't be the judges of that.
The bottom line is that what she is doing to Jocklen is unacceptable. He is no longer a child and that should be respected.
So Jocklen, there are only two options if you want her to stop treating you this way. Either you, yourself talk to her, or get someone you trust to talk to her...Unless you just avoid her altogether, but then where is there a solution to that? The problem will still be there if no one ever talks to her.
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