Starting over - how to avoid poverty

[shadowgem]

Hi,

I'm just about to get divorced after years of being separated. I have a teenage son, a rented home and no career. I wanted to study medicine when I was with my husband but he wouldn't support me in this and wanted me to have children - so we had a child but our relationship went from bad to worse. I got severe (very) depression and now, finally, he's in another relationship and I am on my own with part-time custody of our son. I only became a Christian relatively recently in this.

I have prayed about it but I just don't know what to do for a career or job. Because my depression was so bad I don't officially have to start work until January next year to allow time for recovery (I get benefits). This gives me time to start some kind of course or study but I don't know what.

Before I gave up work i worked as a secretary but hated it and found it very frustrating that people over me got paid at least twice as much but gave me all the jobs they didn't want to do.

I tried asking someone over me at church what should I do but she eventually said that she didn't think God would allow me to have a 'career' as such (something I've always wanted since I get bored so easily) but I can't bear the thought of being poor for the rest of my life - at the moment apart from secretarial work all I can really do is low-income shop work or care work - which won't be enough to build up a pension.

If anyone has any ideas I'd appreciate it - thanks.

 

[Brotherfromanothermother]

I'm not sure what it's like in the UK but
you mentioned medicine. It might be possible to pursue that but in a roundabout way. Here at some junior colleges they offer x-ray tech courses. It might take a couple of years study but they pay well and there's always something new to do. You can (as you progress) move into different specialties such as MRI's etc.

 

[FLANDIDLYANDERS]

Hey a Brit! Woohoo.

Totally ignore whoever you went to for advice.

Just follow your instincts. Do what it takes to get where you want (in a legal and moral way if possible!).

Your lucky you are in Blighty, cos stateside you may well be screwed! Have you talked to any Unis? Cos they have a lot of plans and options for study. Also consider timing. Sure you may be poor right now, but it'll change.

Ironicallly, I'm recently seperated and left with 4 kids and am on sick pay from being a teacher. This will end soon and I will be on benefits. But poverty isnt an issue for me, I juss dont care about "things" and we make do either way. Funny how different us humans are, eh?

Local pharmacies often help fund uni degrees and stuff once you work for them, or at least places like ICI and those giant ones definately do - I only mention local ones cos I got a mate studyin while she works.

Erm, that was quite a ramble,
Peace out.

 

[shadowgem]

Thanks for both replies. I'm now going to find out about radiology and pharmacies - I never knew that pharmacies would sponsor a degree - cool.

I also, because I get bored easily, checked out a writing course with the Open University and might do that if its free - I'm waiting to find out. Anything to keep the brain active - and also I can ease myself back into mental activity.

Thanks again,

 

[tryingtobeagain]

I would tell you to seek out all your options and find the one you would most enjoy and be able to stick to. I'm going through the same thing and I got a job at a local university because they allow you to take so many free courses each year. My probabtion will be up soon and I will be able to sign up for my first courses by summer. I know I'm going to have to suck it up and take out a bit more of my student loan to finish it faster but this is what I want. Also some community colleges have faster courses that finish quickly and give you a decent carear. Hope all goes well for you!

 

[Mskedi]

I'm not sure how the person you talked to at church came to the conclusion that God wouldn't allow you to have a career. What a bizarre notion.

It sounds like you have some leads for what you want to do, so I just thought I'd throw in a "good luck". Community colleges are great and inexpensive places to start out, and usually work well around any work schedule.

 

[madison1101]

Here in the US, we have small colleges called community colleges, like junior college. They offer career counseling and help people figure out what area of study to pursue, based on interests and aptitudes. I don't know if the universities in Britain offer similar services.

As for the advice of your friend, God would most certainly want you to find out your gifts and talents and use them in a career in which to glorify Him. When my husband left me, I went back to graduate school and began pursuing my dream career. Scary, yes. I am in my forties. But, I graduated last year, and now have two careers.

Use this time you have to pray and seek guidance as to what the Lord would want you to do in your career. Remember, with God nothing is impossible.

Hugs,
Trish

 

[shadowgem]

Hey a Brit! Woohoo.

Totally ignore whoever you went to for advice.

Just follow your instincts. Do what it takes to get where you want (in a legal and moral way if possible!).

Your lucky you are in Blighty, cos stateside you may well be screwed! Have you talked to any Unis? Cos they have a lot of plans and options for study. Also consider timing. Sure you may be poor right now, but it'll change.

Ironicallly, I'm recently seperated and left with 4 kids and am on sick pay from being a teacher. This will end soon and I will be on benefits. But poverty isnt an issue for me, I juss dont care about "things" and we make do either way. Funny how different us humans are, eh?

Local pharmacies often help fund uni degrees and stuff once you work for them, or at least places like ICI and those giant ones definately do - I only mention local ones cos I got a mate studyin while she works.

Erm, that was quite a ramble,
Peace out.

Hi flandidlyanders (great name!),
I forgot to explain that the main reason I don't want to be poor is that I had a very poor childhood and there were so many things I could do because my parents didn't have or didn't want to spend the money. Of course, looking back it wasn't just that - it was partly that when they did have the money they didn't want to spend it on me! It just makes me so down when I struggle financially though I realise a lot of people are in that situation.
By the way, that's a lovely photo you have of your family - happy new year!

I would tell you to seek out all your options and find the one you would most enjoy and be able to stick to. I'm going through the same thing and I got a job at a local university because they allow you to take so many free courses each year. My probabtion will be up soon and I will be able to sign up for my first courses by summer. I know I'm going to have to suck it up and take out a bit more of my student loan to finish it faster but this is what I want. Also some community colleges have faster courses that finish quickly and give you a decent carear. Hope all goes well for you!

Thanks for your post - I'm checking out more courses with the Open University right now.

I'm not sure how the person you talked to at church came to the conclusion that God wouldn't allow you to have a career. What a bizarre notion.

It sounds like you have some leads for what you want to do, so I just thought I'd throw in a "good luck". Community colleges are great and inexpensive places to start out, and usually work well around any work schedule.

Thanks for your post - I don't understand that person's advice anymore! She had a lot of influence over me but I think some of things she said have been basically wrong and led me off on to the wrong track. I'm much more wary of listening to her now.

Here in the US, we have small colleges called community colleges, like junior college. They offer career counseling and help people figure out what area of study to pursue, based on interests and aptitudes. I don't know if the universities in Britain offer similar services.

As for the advice of your friend, God would most certainly want you to find out your gifts and talents and use them in a career in which to glorify Him. When my husband left me, I went back to graduate school and began pursuing my dream career. Scary, yes. I am in my forties. But, I graduated last year, and now have two careers.

Use this time you have to pray and seek guidance as to what the Lord would want you to do in your career. Remember, with God nothing is impossible.

Hugs,
Trish

Thanks Trish - your story is so inspiring! I'm pushing forty (39) so its great to hear of someone else pursuing their dream career around this age. Great advice to pray and seek guidance from the Lord too - I will.
Thanks again,

God bless you all,

Shadowgem