Space Between

[BethMae]

What would you say is the best spacing in years between children? Is it three years, two years, five years, one year? How long should someone wait to have another child IYHO (in your humble opinion)? OR do you think having only one is the way to go?

 

[Chenoa]

Hmm... I suppose it depends on a few different things. Maybe its different for everyone...

My daughters are 12, 9 and 4. The first two were about (oh my math is sooo bad!) 2 1/2 years apart with the third coming in about 3 1/2 years later. I think I heard someone say once that 2 years apart is good, and I have to say, I wish I had had my third a bit sooner... she is left out of so much because she is so much younger.

I think 2 years is good because that gives your body time to get back to normal, and if you breastfeed it gives you plenty of time to wean, plus I think when they are closer in age they can play together better. I have known a few people who have had them about a year apart. The kids are very close and get along well, but I know it was very hard for them having more than one child in diapers at the same time.

But I think God has alot to do with the timing of our children, birth control or not.

I was an only child. I hated it. I always wanted a sister, I never had anyone to play with. But then I was spoiled... bad part, but I did become a very creative and imaginitive person..... who tends to dream a little to much! LOL When theres no one else to play with.... not much else to do but make believe.

Theres alot of different reasons for having or waiting... good luck to you!


Chenoa

 

[Christdefinesme]

Whatever you think you can handle is what is best, I think.
I personally LOVE the spacing of our kids.
Thank you, Lord! (after all, He gets the credit....)
2y9m between 1 & 2, 2y9m between 2 & 3, 4y9m between 3 & 4.
I loved this spacing, because it has given us lots of time to
"get to know" each child and grow into being a family.
Each child was old enough to understand and welcome the next child
into the family.
It gave me enough time to REALLY WANT another pregnancy and baby.
It's been a blessing.

 

[KristyAnne]

I've heard that three years is supposed to be the best amount of time, but I suppose it all comes down to what is best for you and your family. My husband is the oldest of four children, with a six year age gap between he and the youngest. It must have been difficult when they were younger (for their parents), but now they are really close, and I think the fact that they are quite close in age has a bit to do with it.

Personally, I like the idea of a two to three year age gap between siblings. I only have the one at the moment, though, so my opinion on this matter may change when faced with the reality of caring for more than one child

Kristy

 

[okiemommy26]

All I have to say is that it is in God's hands. My children are 4 yrs apart but I did not plan on it like that. I wanted to be pregnant again when Desi was 4 months old but I did not get pregnant till she was 3yrs old. Which I am so thankful for. I do not think I could handle two under two.

 

[Leanna]

It is a matter of personal preference, and I have been asking myself the same question. We are going to aim for 3 years apart.

 

[AbidingInHim]

I believed 3 years was the ideal, that's how it worked out the first time around, now there was little to no adjustment for him at 3 he was over the me stage and totally all about being a big brother....so much so that as soon as one was born he started praying for another, 13 months after the 2nd child the 3rd made his arrival. In all honesty the whole time I just kept repeating God knows best God knows best it was too overwhelming to believe, and well, He did know best, the first year and the pregnancy was really hard but now I LOVE have the 13 months difference.

 

[HoshiG]

I read the best age gaps are either 1 1/2 years difference or under, or 3 years and over. Apparently children with gaps between that tend to go through a tougher period of not getting along and jealousy.



I *wish* I could have my children about 1 1/2 years apart... but there are two reasons that we won't have this.
1) I was sick my entire pregnancy and throughout exclusively breastfeeding... I don't know if I can handle going through that again and care for my daughter. (Doesn't matter how many times I'm told every pregnancy is different, doesn't mean I won't be that sick again). I finally feel well again and I want to enjoy that.

2) My husband doesn't feel we could afford a second child at the moment. I am a stay-at-home-mom, which we both wanted, so we only have the one income. Plus, we have aspirations to move to Canada.

 

[Zoomer]

I love the spacing between my children, they are 15 months apart. Since they are so close, they enjoy the same things and are each other playmates and best friends.

 

[Princessperky]

The one God picks, he picked 11 years for one friend, she loves it the kids love it.

He picked less than a year for another friend, she loves it and the kids love it.

He picked (umm ok I admit I tried to keep the time at least a year) less than 2 years each time for me, I love it the kids love it. Who knows what the next one will be, I always say I want to wait more than a year, but....