I'd have to disagree, Cartman is evil. He wants to eliminate all of the Jews, and he's fed some kid his own parents in the form of chili.
Cartman: What? You mean how how you put (hair from the lower regions) in your chili?
Scott Tenorman: What?
Cartman: Yes, I'm afraid this isn't your chili Scott. I switched it with Chef's. It's delicious Chef! I hadn't planned on that, what I did plan on however was that my friends Stan and Kyle would betray me and warn you that the chili-con-carnival was a trap. I assumed that they would tell you that I had trained Dingkin's(?) pony to bite off your weener! What they didn't tell you was that Dingkin's is a crazy redneck who shoots trespassers on sight, knowing you'd go and do something to the pony - I warned Mr. Dingkins that violent ponykillers were in the area, I also knew that you wouldn't go yourself for fear of getting your weener bitten off. You would most likely send your parents.. And I'm afraid that when Mr. Dingkins spotted them on his property he shot and killed both your parents
Mr. Dingkins: Well they was trespassing and I was protecting myself! I have my rights!
Scott Tenorman: My mom and dead are dead?
Cartman: I came just in time to see Mr. Dingkins to give his report to Officer Barbrady... And of course to steal the bodies! After a night with the hacksaw I was all ready to put on my chili-con-carnival so I could tell you personally about your parents demise - And of course.. Feed you your chili! Do you like it, do you like it scott? I call it Mr. and Mrs. Tenorman Chili!
Scott Tenorman: Oh my God! *fishes out finger* Oh my God! *throws up*
Cartman: Na na na na! I made you eat your parents! Na na na na!
Stan: Jesus Christ dude...
Scott Tenorman: My mom and dad are dead *cries*
Radiohead guy 1: Uhm excuse me.
Stan: Who are you?
Radiohead guy 2: We're that band, Radiohead
Radiohead guy 1: Jeez, what a little cry baby *points at Scott*
Radiohead guy 3: You gonna cry all day, crybaby?
Radiohead guy 2: You know everyone has problems, it doesn't mean you have to be a little crybaby about it
Radiohead guy 1: C'mon guys let us go, this kid is totally not cool
Radiohead guy 3: Yeah, that's the most uncool kid I've ever met
Radiohead guy 4: Little crybaby
Scott Tenorman: No wait! Waaaiit! Oh my god! Oh my god! *cries*
Cartman: Yeeeesss! Yeeeess! Oh let me taste your tears Scott *licks* Mmmh, your tears are so yummy and sweet!
Kyle: Dude, I think it might be best for us to never [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse] Cartman off again
Stan: Good call..
Cartman: Ooh, the tears of unfathomable sadness .. Mmh yummy ... Mmmh yummy you guys
Cartman is sick, but we all love him for that!