Something few people consider...

[LonelyTraveler]

How to prepare for death when you're alone and unloved? Some of us have kids/grandkids from previous relationships who will get our stuff. And hopefully those same ones will be at our side during our last hours. But what about those of us who were never accepted? Those like me who have no friends or loved ones or children to care for us and become the new stewards of the stuff God loaned us while we were here?

I've already decided that I need to draw up a will to leave everything to a relative so that at least that part of the ordeal will be easy. My life insurance will take care of my debts. But what about my body? This morning while I was walking, I got to thinking about how I should die. I figured that when the time came, I'd make sure that what stuff I hadn't given away was organized. Then I'd leave the house and head to the hospital where I would die near the front door with a note pinned to my shirt: "I'm an organ donor. Contact my mother to confirm. Take what you need. Throw the rest in the river for the fish." No need for a grave or lengthy service. A one-car funeral isn't worth the trouble of pre-arranging. A simple prayer for those who benefit from my death is enough. I don't feel that anyone would be too inconvenienced by my passing. Hospital people probably deal with unknown dead bodies all the time. Nothing new to them.

But it seems like I'm missing something. People usually make a big to-do about someone dying. But to me it seems so simple and if the Lord wills it I'd hope that it would be that way. My soul will be in heaven singing with the angels and the vessel that it occupied will return to the earth. Everything will be good. Am I missing something?

What are y'all's opinions? I'd love to hear others' perspective.

 

[Inkachu]

I think, that given your current no family/children situation...your perspective is perfectly healthy and understandable. I think that everyone should get their "affairs" in order as soon as they hit adulthoood, since we never know when we're gonna kick the bucket.

And I should take my own advice, since I haven't done my own will yet, lol.

I don't have a huge circle of family and friends to worry about. My biggest thought is for my son, of course. I really don't believe God will take me from him, but I should be practical and make a will anyway.

But since you're only 29...you've got SO many years ahead to encounter new friends and romances. Don't rule it all out just yet

 

[country woman]

you are still young and in good health I hope. What happens if you meet that someone special then you have to change you will, I am not saying postpone your will I think every one should have a will
I just went through all this when my dad passed away, he said one thing and the will said another and my foster sister got everything

I was raised in a foster home since I was 18 months old

 

[faithopelove]

I to think it's good to prepare for death but I sense you may need to talk to someone about why you may have trouble connecting to others. I would suggest a good christian counselor if you can afford it or maybe a minister or mature christian at your church. I'm a social worker and I know social problems are fixable. I am a witness that interacting with others does not come naturally to everyone.

 

[JohnDB]

Take your cell phone with you and have an ICE name and number..someone who knows will call that number...

ICE stands for in case of emergency...
and sometimes people will look for it in your cell phone...it will get them in contact with someone that knows you and your family.

other than that...

most don't and wont go that way...

Likely you will die in your bed or in a hospital...maybe a skilled nursing facility.

Ask a coroner or funeral home. They will tell you.

 

[LonelyTraveler]

Thanks y'all. I'd heard about the ICE thing before, but just now went ahead and put a number there.

I've been to a counselor in the past. She didn't help. Told me I would become a drug abuser. I stayed away from drugs just to prove her wrong, and wound up never making any real friends.

I don't have that much stuff, so I doubt anyone will be hurt if I just leave everything to one person and let others get what they want from her.

Yes, I'm only 29. But if I'd had my way I would've went to heaven 12 years ago. But God wouldn't let me die.

 

[Jenster]

I think your presence counts more than you realize, LonelyTraveler.

Good question about planning for the eventuality. I think we should leave well, as well as live well. That way the question becomes: How could I benefit people, even in death? Could I state in my will that I'd like to donate my books to the library? Could I give my old clothes to the local homeless shelter?

We never know when the Lord will call us home. But in the meantime, we can try to do the things that He's calling us to do. Helping other people and stuff.

 

[Mrs. Luther073082]

I've been to a counselor in the past. She didn't help. Told me I would become a drug abuser. I stayed away from drugs just to prove her wrong, and wound up never making any real friends.

That was one counselor. Obviously, that one wasn't very professional to tell you she thought you would become a drug abuser. However, to assume all counselors will be like her is overgeneralizing about counselors, which is no more fair than people overgeneralizing about overweight individuals (for example, saying that anyone who is overweight must be lazy, must not care about themselves, "does not deserve to be loved", etc).

 

[ido]

I think your presence counts more than you realize, LonelyTraveler.

Good question about planning for the eventuality. I think we should leave well, as well as live well. That way the question becomes: How could I benefit people, even in death? Could I state in my will that I'd like to donate my books to the library? Could I give my old clothes to the local homeless shelter?

We never know when the Lord will call us home. But in the meantime, we can try to do the things that He's calling us to do. Helping other people and stuff.

Agreed. Great post.

 

[ido]

That was one counselor. Obviously, that one wasn't very professional to tell you she thought you would become a drug abuser. However, to assume all counselors will be like her is overgeneralizing about counselors, which is no more fair than people overgeneralizing about overweight individuals (for example, saying that anyone who is overweight must be lazy, must not care about themselves, "does not deserve to be loved", etc).

So true. I've been to a few counselors over the years and they were all very different. Counselors are like doctors - you have to find one that suits your needs. Not all doctors are good - not all counselors are, either.

JMHO

 

[HoosierCanuck]

How to prepare for death when you're alone and unloved? Some of us have kids/grandkids from previous relationships who will get our stuff. And hopefully those same ones will be at our side during our last hours. But what about those of us who were never accepted? Those like me who have no friends or loved ones or children to care for us and become the new stewards of the stuff God loaned us while we were here?

I've already decided that I need to draw up a will to leave everything to a relative so that at least that part of the ordeal will be easy. My life insurance will take care of my debts. But what about my body? This morning while I was walking, I got to thinking about how I should die. I figured that when the time came, I'd make sure that what stuff I hadn't given away was organized. Then I'd leave the house and head to the hospital where I would die near the front door with a note pinned to my shirt: "I'm an organ donor. Contact my mother to confirm. Take what you need. Throw the rest in the river for the fish." No need for a grave or lengthy service. A one-car funeral isn't worth the trouble of pre-arranging. A simple prayer for those who benefit from my death is enough. I don't feel that anyone would be too inconvenienced by my passing. Hospital people probably deal with unknown dead bodies all the time. Nothing new to them.

But it seems like I'm missing something. People usually make a big to-do about someone dying. But to me it seems so simple and if the Lord wills it I'd hope that it would be that way. My soul will be in heaven singing with the angels and the vessel that it occupied will return to the earth. Everything will be good. Am I missing something?

What are y'all's opinions? I'd love to hear others' perspective.

It's a good question and a good idea. My mum has commented to me before about having a 'living will' in the event something would happen to me. I just hope I outlive my cats because no one in my family wants them.

As for my body...I don't know what I want yet. I've joked that I'm clausterphobic so burial wouldn't work and yet I'm not keen on being burned either so cremation kind of creeps me out. Maybe I should be buried at sea since I like the ocean. lol (sorry, I probably shouldn't make morbid 'jokes', eh?)