Something feels very off

[Seraphim19]

Hi again everyone, I made a post a few weeks ago about having issues with my girlfriend and breaking up temporarily. But now, a few weeks later after getting back together, something feels very wrong. As I said before, we had been spending way too much time together (especially alone where we failed with lust many times). Before October (the month we slipped up the first time) we were absolutely crazy about eachother in the purest form. I hate to be partially responsible, but I feel that because I made the first move in messing up, her relationship as well as my relationship with Christ has been damaged and it hasn't become better since because we keep messing up with physical stuff (never sex, just touching.)

A couple of days ago, she told me that she felt something was off in our relationship. After trying to figure it out, she told me that now that we are in the middle stage of our relationship, she is stuggling with the idea of being committed to me ( or anyone for that matter she said) because she has been single and free her whole life. She insisted that she loves me, and feels trapped because she doesn't want to lose me, but gets very frustrated because we cannot express love any deeper. We are peaked out with what we can do, and sexual sin has taken a tole on our relationship.

I feel as if I'm losing what used to be the best gift (besides the grace of Jesus Christ) - a person that seemed to have been given to me from heaven, until I blew it by getting physical. If you are in a relationship and find yourself very tempted to push the physical boundaries, take the advice of someone who is deeply hurting because of it - DON'T DO IT. The minute you let yourself go (even slightly) is the minute that sin slips into the middle of your relationship and pushes Jesus out.

I had the most beautiful relationship with this girl, you know why? because our relationship with Jesus Christ was more important than the relationship with eachother. Now, we have been struggling so very hard to put Jesus back as our priority for 5 months now. It's not worth it anymore. How could I be so terrible and blow everything.

Lust and sexual tempation kill.

I wish I could do something, but I may need to break off this relationship. I'm so sorry Jesus for wasting what you gave me.

-a lament from a hurting sinner.

 

[eyeliv4God]

our relationship with Jesus Christ was more important than the relationship with eachother

I really liked this statement; this is how it should always be.

 

[ahmunmun]

I am really glad you learned your lesson. Also, thanks for sharing. I am really glad that you care about us enough to warn us the consequence of your mistake, in the hope that we wouldn't make the same mistake.

Don't forget that Christ loves you. He will forgive you when you repent from your sins.

Hebrews 10:17, "And their sins and iniquities will I remember no more."

Philippians 3:13, "Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before."

God bless you!

 

[Leanna]

Lust can affect a relationship.... but I also think there is more going on here. You are going through the normal stages of a relationship.... first you see each others similarities and how much you have in common.... and its exciting! Then emotions calm down and you see the differences and how much you need to struggle with. For some people it takes a couple years to get to the second part, others only months.

 

[CFpetRESCUER7]

Lust definitely puts a damper on a relationship. But like someone already said, when two humans come together it is already sin. We were born sinners. Putting Jesus first and eachother second helps you grow in your relationship with both Christ and your significant other.
Just because you sin doesn't mean you need to end the relationship and destroy what you still have. Repent, try to fix the problems you had, and then try to take a step forward instead of two steps back. If it doesn't work, then atleast you know you tried.
I'd talk to your girlfriend about that "commiting herself to someone" thing though, it sounds like she has some commitment issues. It takes two to work a relationship, just like it takes two to tango . Talk to her, maybe you can work this whole thing out. You both have to want to though.
I hope everything works out for you

~~