I'm bringing out the old sheet of paper my AI buddies know so well.
Alright, so Thayne and the sassy Chelsea are doing jazz. It stunk. There was no dancing. It was just some jerky movements. Nothing impressive. It was boring and stupid and I hated it. And Nigel's right, her ruffle was hideous.
Mark and the other Chelsea of puffball dress fame did an Argentine Tango. I don't know one tango from the other, so okay. Her outfit was very... Princess Leia in Episode 6. Yeeeeeek. My notes, quoted verbatim, are, "Yeah. OK. Good. Not awesome." It was better than last week's tango anyways. And they're right, there was no "sexual tension" or whatever. Now, for all you old timers, I have a question. Does Mia Michaels always make up words like that? She sounds like a dippy pre-teen.
Jessica and Will attempted a hip-hop routine. There was not even the slight resemblance to a story, which put me off. They looked like backup dancers, honestly. I don't watch this show for backup dancer material!! I don't spend FOUR HOURS every week to see someone who's not a headliner. And, uh, I think I missed something. They keep heaping praise on this boy, but I thought
she did better than he did. It was all just meh though.
Kourtni and Matt are doing a foxtrot (again, means nothing to me outside the comic strip). Awwww, he gets lost in her eyes. Bonus points for him right there. Um, the whole thing was just so-so for me. I mean it was good, but don't link them in my mind with Ginger and Fred unless they can deliver it. And her hair was kinda icky. And what does "twee" mean? And WHO on earth did Cat say was in Singin' in the Rain? The name is Debbie Reynolds, hun, not whatever you said. Please, please, please don't mess with my classics.
Courtney and Gev (of the hideous tango) are going to try to change my opinion of them with a contemporary routine. The TMI about the dance belt isn't helping things. But the dance did. The dance did ALOT. I think it might be my favorite of the night, actually. Their expressions, hers especially, were just beautiful, and it was all so pretty and lovely and heartfelt, like something from a book. Very nice, very nice, indeed.
Katie and Joshua can probably never top last week, but they did great with Broadway this week. It was fun and happy and cheesy and quirky. Nigel obviously loved it and I'd love to see Simon act like that one year.
Susie and Marquis attempted a salsa and I REALLY mean attempted. Her outfit was hideous. He WAS too jello, even though in some parts he was very masculine with his shoulders and chest. The spin over the head was nice, but that was really the only part I liked.
Kherrington and Twitch did this Viennese Waltz thing (again, don't know one from the other). I loved it. I loved seeing Twitch unbuttoned
blush: ), I loved how her dress flowed, I loved their movements, I loved her smile. But should he have stayed in one spot when twirling her above his head? I thought Mia was a bit out of line and very snippy, but it all made Mary cry, so I suppose it evened out.
Comfort and Chris are doing crump... oh dear. Chris was rather cotton candy (to borrow last week's phrase), while Comfort looked drop-dead evil. Nigel was right in that they needed to just nail that thing to the floor instead of tapping it with a Preskool tinker toy hammer. And the geeky moves Chris pulled when Cat was reading off their number really didn't help.
